MY WORK ... MY PASSION

• Certified Transpersonal Hypnotherapist ; Past experiences: Dream Analysis /10 Years Experience •Psychotherapist / Use of Gestalt, Jungian, Zen, Reality and Energy Therapies /10 Years Experience •EMDR • Men and Their Journey: the neuroscience of the male brain, and the implications in sexuality, education and relationship • Women: Their Transformation and Empowerment ATOD (Alcohol, Tobacco and Other Drugs) / 21 years experience •Ordained Interfaith Minister & Official Celebrant • Social Justice Advocate • Child and Human Rights Advocate • Spiritual Guide and Intuitive • Certified Reiki Practitioner • Mediation / Conflict Resolution • “Intentional Love” Parenting Strategy Groups • Parenting Workshops • Coaching for parents of Indigo, Crystal, and Rainbow Children • International Training: Israel & England • Critical Incident Stress Debriefing • Post-911 and Post-Katrina volunteer

MSW - UNC Chapel Hill

BSW - UNC Greensboro


With immense love I wish Happy Birthday to my three grandchildren!

May 22: Brannock

May 30: Brinkley

June 12: Brogan

All three have birthdays in the same 22 days of the year ....what a busy time for the family!

"An Unending Love"

This blog and video is devoted and dedicated to my precious daughter Jennifer, my grand daughters Brogan and Brinkley, and my grand son Brannock. They are hearts of my heart. Our connection through many lives..... is utterly infinite.




The Definition of Genius

"THRIVE"

https://youtu.be/Lr-RoQ24lLg

"ONLY LOVE PREVAILS" ...."I've loved you for a thousand years; I'll love you for a thousand more....."


As we are in the winter of our lives, I dedicate this to Andrew, Dr. John J.C. Jr. and Gary W., MD, (who has gone on before us). My love and admiration is unfathomable for each of you..........and what you have brought into this world.....so profoundly to me.
The metaphors are rich and provocative; we're in them now. This world is indeed disappearing, and the richest eternal world awaits us!
The intensity, as was in each of the three of us, is in yellow!
In my heart forever.........

Slowly the truth is loading
I'm weighted down with love
Snow lying deep and even
Strung out and dreaming of
Night falling on the city
Quite something to behold
Don't it just look so pretty
This disappearing world

We're threading hope like fire

Down through the desperate blood
Down through the trailing wire
Into the leafless wood

Night falling on the city
Quite something to behold
Don't it just look so pretty
This disappearing world
This disappearing world


I'll be sticking right there with it
I'll be by y
our side
Sailing like a silver bullet
Hit 'em 'tween the eyes
Through the smoke and rising water
Cross the great divide
Baby till it all feels right

Night falling on the city
Sparkling red and gold
Don't it just look so pretty
This disappearing world
This
disappearing world
This disappearing world
This disappearing world


TECHNOLOGY..........

In “Conversations with God”, by Neale Donald Walsch, there is a warning I think of. I refer to it as the Atlantis passage, and I've quoted it a few times before." As I have said, this isn't the first time your civilization has been at this brink,"

God tells Walsch. "I want to repeat this, because it is vital that you hear this. Once before on your planet, the technology you developed was far greater than your ability to use it responsibly. You are approaching the same point in human history again. It is vitally important that you understand this. Your present technology is threatening to outstrip your ability to use it wisely. Your society is on the verge of becoming a product of your technology rather than your technology being a product of your society. When a society becomes a product of its own technology, it destroys itself."

Monday, December 28, 2015

Donald Trump Leads an Insane White Cult — and Pat Buchanan Just Explained How It Works | Alternet

Donald Trump Leads an Insane White Cult — and Pat Buchanan Just Explained How It Works | Alternet

All is Lost | Film Reviews | Films | Spirituality

Recently, I blogged about Robert Redford and his passion for the natural earth.  Synchronistically, I was sent this review by a friend just prior to watching "All Is Lost", with Robert Redford.  Since the review contains the particulars of this outstanding film, I was struck personally by his final note, stating, "I tried."



When I was 11, I went to my grandmother's funeral, the marker was discussed at some point.  For some reason, I was intrigued by what one says on a marker, and wondered if they (the deceased) predetermined that. I vowed I would.  Already my life had its share of chaos, but even then I considered myself in certain ways ... a sense of nonduality already prevailed, but certainly not in that word or theory.  I recall then, and through the years, that the phrase, "I tried", certainly captured what I knew to be the deepest essence of me. Thus, this film ... add that to my age, life experiences, and my belief system ...  had a deep impact. This film says it for many of us, I think......

*********************************************

"An immersive drama about being resilient and facing the fear we all have of dying alone..."

CLICK HERE TO READ THIS REVIEW

Saturday, December 26, 2015

"The Beauty in Authenticity" by Anna Trishch

Through my entire life, I believe that I value authenticity most highly.  My own interpretation of it is that it underscores integrity and love ... hence neither of those are possible without authenticity.........


By Anna Trishch

Self-empowerment comes from owning your life. A strong and happy person is authentic and genuine no matter what happens, and by being authentic you release everything that no longer serves you and connect with your true identity. Life treasures become available when you are aligned in harmony with your true inner Self.
Authenticity starts in the heart, when you fully embrace your life experience and your personality with all the victories and defeats.
You grow when you learn from mistakes. You progress by setting higher and higher standards. Once you admit imperfections and vulnerabilities, you know which way to move to improve. It’s ok to be imperfect. That’s the beauty of life.
Authenticity is a choice we have as a human being—one who can make mistakes and learn from them. Life becomes easier that way. Very often, the greatest benefits flow from ill fortune. Success usually results by learning from multiple failures.
Authenticity is the courage to admit that something is wrong. Unless you look your fears/problems in the eye, they will remain present in your life spreading negative energy.
Authenticity is accepting and loving who you are, but aspiring to become more. It doesn’t matter what you have or what you achieved—your life is precious and you are worthy. By loving yourself unconditionally, you attract powerful and pure energy that works miracles.
Authenticity is not playing the game of “looking good.”
Authenticity is not pretending. In life, you must wear different hats to develop your personality and perform the various roles required to fulfill your life mission. However, this is different from wearing masks—pretending and playing to be something you are not, which eventually alienates you from who you really are and deprives you of your personal power.
Authenticity is not worrying about what others think of you. Strong and successful people are never concerned about public opinion. Don’t waste your energy on anything that doesn’t serve you.
Authenticity is living your life, not fulfilling the expectations of others. You are the creator of your life. You design your life according to your dreams and aspirations. You don’t need external approval to feel good about your actions.
Authenticity is the courage to show up for life and live it.
Life opens up when you dare to pursue your dreams. Your life journey becomes exciting when you have a sense of purpose.
Authenticity is asking for what you really desire. You are not alone in the big world. The energy you put out is always returned. The universe always answers.
You have a gift called life. It is unique, amazing, and beautiful. It is up you what you do with it. Quite often there is treasure in the trash, a diamond in the rock, or a butterfly in the caterpillar. You discover your own gift by opening your heart, by being truthful with yourself. Your life path is engaging and thrilling when you are honest and genuine.
You were born to be real not to be perfect! That is the beauty found in Authenticity!
Anna Trishch is a lover of life, an author, a life coach and a public speaker. Coming from a very modest background in a small Ukrainian town, she faced many challenges and financial hardships as a child and teenager. Although Anna’s parents were loving and caring, they came from a victimhood mentality that did not resonate with her soul. A believer that we are the creators of our own life, Anna went on to study at Ostroh Academy, one of the best Ukrainian universities. Today, she speaks four languages and lives her dream life in Miami. She helps people to discover the universal truth about human greatness and unlimited human potential; it is never about resources, but always about resourcefulness. Visit her online at www.annatrishch.com, email annatrishch1@gmail.com or call 786-768-4130.

The Tipping Point Is Here --- and It's All About You!! by Zen Gardner




30 310

image_printby Zen Gardner"There’s no question about it. We’re there. And I’m not just talking about the globalist takeover bid they’re hastily and clumsily trying to execute.The awakening is erupting.Many feel lost and afraid right now all across the spectrum of humanity. This deliberate creation of chaos is designed to do just that. However, parallel and simultaneous to their psychotic designs is a massive arousal of the human spirit, spurred on by an arising of conscious awareness and a deep sense of growing personal realization and empowerment.Most may not recognize these rising seemingly confusing energetic changes as being the creative process at work, but it is. Awakening is first of all a destructive process, eliminating everything that is unreal and inhibitive of personal development and progress. These two dynamics work concurrently.
When you stand back and observe with washened eyes you’ll see it, and it brings great peace in the midst of these stormy times.

What Price Awakening?

Being awake comes with a price, and it may have been upped a bit or even a lot lately. You’re being worked on. Letting go and getting the most out of challenging circumstances and conditions is vital to growth. Don’t fight it, whatever you do.
It’s very sad to see unawakened humanity being tossed to and fro without a clue as to what is really going on. But even that is an “engineered” shake up designed by Universe to help every one of us come to our senses and transcend this false reality. Millions are flocking to alternative news sources to try to make sense of what’s going on, and they’re stumbling on realities they never considered before.
And that’s a wonderful thing. It will cause a lot of pain to make the realizations they’re being presented with but again, that’s alright. Truth comes with a cost – the end of the lies and illusions they had previously based their entire lives on. And it’s an ongoing process.
Many will be forced to enter the “dark night of the soul” whether they want to or not. I can tell you from personal experience that it’s a hell of a lot easier and quicker if you elect to let yourself go through it, and in many ways the sooner you do, if you haven’t already, the better.

What Do We Do?

So what should we do? If we know the truth, we’re responsible not only to share it passionately, but also to live it. This is where it gets even more uncomfortable, but it must be done. The hour is late and the times we are living in are dire. There’s no alternative any more.
We have to rise to the occasion. It’s virtually us or them, life or death, truth or lies, freedom or slavery – for not just ourselves but our loved ones, progeny and the entire human race. That’s what makes this the opportunity of a lifetime, and our marvelous creative Universe is there to meet you if you dare walk the path.
In fact, you’ll even meet your true self, what you’ve been looking and longing for your whole life!

The Tipping Point

I posted two remarkable videos today, clear signals that the tide is not , turning, but the tide of humanity awakening is rising quickly. What we do from here is supremely important as we have a growing array of opportunities for active participation unfolding before us. And there will be more, but waiting to start somewhere is not an option.
The time to activate is now. Let anything that hinders this fall away from your life, whatever the cost. The call for our inner warriors to rise could not be any clearer.
You’ll see these manifestations of the tipping point we’ve reached everywhere if you look. People’s tones are changing, minds are tossed about but exploring new perspectives, truths are being outed like never before. It’s an amazing time. Don’t stare at the machinations of the powers that shouldn’t be, they’re designed to distract and disempower. This is crucial.
And don’t think Gaia is going to take all this lying down either. We’re talking about a massive energetic change we have the privilege to be a part of. Remember, nature bats last.

Fed Up? Good!

Many are getting fed up with false flags, mass shootings, war drums, complete media bullshit and the fear riddled bloviations of the psychopaths in the news. That’s actually good, and one of the main symptoms of what I’m addressing here. You’re fed up – you’ve had enough. So turn it off. Just get the essentials from the independent and alternative news to keep an eye on things then turn it off. Draw on empowering sources that feed your soul and inspire your heart and draw close to supportive loved ones.
Take the exploration of self you’re no doubt being presented with and see where it takes you.
That’s the primary battle at hand. We need to become who we truly are if we’re to finish this out the way we should, could, can and will. But don’t dwell on your own damn ass all day either. Activate and proliferate the truth and build community and bonds of love with those you’re being called to be with. We all need this support and strength, and environments where we can be our authentic selves and grow into the full stature of awakened, empowered souls.
Enjoy the ride, but don’t buck at the pain and sacrifices when they present themselves. They’re small fry compared to the glorious new world being birthed in the hearts of our beloved mankind.
"
 http://www.zengardner.com/the-tipping-point-is-here-and-its-all-about-you/

Thursday, December 24, 2015

The Power of Authenticity | Psychology Today

"Being authentic in relationships is easier said than done. It requires that we tend closely to our actual felt experience. Rather than defend and protect ourselves, it means finding the courage to allow ourselves to be vulnerable and then show that to a person we want to be close to....."CLICK HERE TO READ MORE

To Thine Own Self: The Psychology of Authenticity | Wray Herbert

"One of the core principles of Alcoholics Anonymous, the 12-step addiction-recovery program, is authenticity. At least two of the steps emphasize the importance of honest moral inventory, and the AA "chip" -- the medallion handed out to commemorate periods of continued sobriety -- reads, "To thine own self be true."
The people who created AA back in the 1930s were not scientists or philosophers...."To Thine Own Self: The Psychology of Authenticity | Wray Herbert

Thursday, December 17, 2015

If the Last Republican Debate Did Not Scare You, You are Unscarable/Joe Carl/ Daily Kos





One of the ways I evaluate pretenders to the presidency is what I call the October Test.  I remember walking home from school one day in October of 1962 to parents who seemed unusually subdued and glued to the television set.  Over the next few days, I noticed that they watched a lot of news broadcasts.  (This was before cable news.  Midnight to midnight, Monday to Sunday coverage of important events like the Jodi Arias trial had not yet been perpetrated against the American public.)
It all passed, nothing changed in my young life, and I forgot about what I never had paid much attention to anyway.  It was not until decades later that I picked up a book on the Cuban Missile Crisis.  Other books and TV documentaries followed as I began to understand how deeply frightened a lot of people in knowledgeable positions had been and how close we had come.  Delve into those two sobering weeks and you never again will look at politics or politicians in the same way.
Now, I try to imagine a candidate in the role of JFK.  I try to imagine that candidate, huddled with whomever I think they might surround themselves with, waiting for the next communique from Moscow and facing Armageddon.  I try to imagine whether they would have the character and the prudence, the steadiness and the humility, the patience and the creativity and the overall judgement that it took to save the world during those dark negotiations.
Last night, that pathetic collection of belligerent, sable rattling, self-amplifying warmongers, each trying to outdo the other like schoolboys, failed the October Test — and not by a little.  I am properly scared.

Not a peep in the debate about that other terrorist attack on U.S. soil

"I suppose we should have guessed, but so far there's not been a peep from either CNN or the other candidates about theother terrorist attack on American soil in the last few weeks, the murder of...."   CLICK HERE FOR "SKETCHY" REPORTING!

Sunday, December 13, 2015

PROFOUND JOY!

JOY!

Yes, it is the time of year when this word is used more than any other.  This post is surely not about proselytizing because, for me, I truly dislike that.  I grit my teeth when anyone (since I live in the Bible belt) questions “what I do for my religion”, and proceeds to tell me I have the “wrong beliefs”.  My sense of logic then is “head-shakin’ ”, and I usually ask a rather penetrating question of them.  Yes, often with one eyebrow raised with discernment.  Accompanied by my direct and sustained eye contact, I do confess to “poking the bear” a bit.  Or, I politely smile, bid adieu, and walk away.  

My closest friends smile, for my capability for delivering the poke has increased in softness of voice and caring in my eyes.  On occasion, they say it was so “gentle” the person may not have even gotten it.  I usually think they did.  On some level, for sure!  I am too much of an instigator in the name of Truth (whatever that  is).  No, that is not  solely My Truth, but rather a bringing forth  of that person’s Truth.  Then, hopefully, our conjoined Truth.  And that is where the conversation really begins.  

As the years have gone by, I have decidedly gone through metamorphoses and intentional reconstruction as a result of intense inner work.  
I fully accept adjectives formerly used about me:  intense, authentic, impassioned, ernest.  I was frequently  called ‘guileless’ in my midlife, and I disowned that inwardly then with a “Yeah, right”.  Some decades later, I begin to see the truth in that descriptor as it has to do with each of those other descriptors.  Now, I am fiercely protective of that notion for, in a way, I have labored long and hard to retain that simplicity and belief in many things innocent.  Not the least of which is my view of many people and events.  Also, through the years , much has evolved the balancing factor for “guileless”.  It harmonizes, in that amalgam, with  my candor and authenticity … birthed by much hard work.  

That work was some decades of dear mentors and significant others,  for which I  have the deepest gratitude for their intersection with my life.  The wonder is that the work was also the human transaction with people whom I loved and revered, and who intentionally chose to hurt me for their own ends. This, then, is the most interesting phenomenon to me.  

Over a decade ago, I started taking a path  towards a more observant (than reactive) role.  With sadness and occasional irritation, I “watched” as they did or said things, which I knew full well were fully intentional to hurt me or even harm me. I noticed in myself that this hurt or anger was eventually underscored by love for each.   Wisdom was evolving, and I was amazed at what I could now see … really see.   

This occurred with regularity about every family member, friend, mentor (present and former).  That is not to say I did not shed some tears, or utter a  brief expletive, but over time I experienceed the forward movement of … get this …the process … replete with loving forgiveness and … JOY.   My firm belief is that  and EVERY  human being is there to move us on that forward movement with our learning.  

The catch?  Therein lies the growth.  We  must have humility and acquiescence, yet cloaked with self-protection and reality.  Many people are those from whom we need to detach, and whose very presence is no longer a call to grow through lifely connection Those people need to grow, on their own, until they learn that hurting others, gaslighting, dishonesty, etc., are simply not what one needs for spiritual forward movement.  Yet, as we turn from them, it is with a lump in one’s throat for the teaching they brought into our (my) life. 

That contract is indeed holy.  

It is JOY.  And it is LOVE. 

And, though I suspect that any earthly involvement with their physicality will be no more in my life, I occasionally fantasize, if even for a fleeting moment, that in the afterlife, we might just hang out with a beer (hopefully, they have that in the afterlife!!)… and talk about our perspectives then.  I know that whether Truth, or my projections, I saw some extraordinarily fine points in each … points that stirred me to love profoundly … points, potent enough to ultimately transform me.  Tough education.

Hence … eventually to learn the exquisitely hard lessons each brought.  


The profound proof is that joy  and  fun … can be mutually exclusive.

Saturday, December 12, 2015

The Beauty in Authenticity | by Anna Trishch

By Anna Trishch
Self-empowerment comes from owning your life. A strong and happy person is authentic and genuine no matter what happens, and by being authentic you release everything that no longer serves you and connect with your true identity. Life treasures become available when you are aligned in harmony with your true inner Self.
CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING THIS EXCELLENT ARTICLE

Memories of Heaven by Dr. Wayne Dyer |

By Dr. Wayne W. Dyer
"I have enjoyed a lifetime love affair with children, particularly newborns, infants, and toddlers. If a baby is in the room, it’s almost as if there is a magnetic connection that draws my attention and I must make contact. Being the father of eight children, I have spent countless hours simply gazing into the eyes of a brand-new arrival into our family. In these private moments, I often send silent inquisitive messages asking them to tell me about God and what the formless spiritual world is like."  
CLICK HERE TO READ: Memories of Heaven by Dr. Wayne Dyer |

Wanting vs Having, Disabling Hypnotic Language, Working with Subconscious Mind | Jack Elias

Wanting vs. Having: Disabling Hypnotic LanguagePosted: 02-02-2011 12:41 pm by Jack Elias, CHT
LINE
art11_elias_imageI was particularly struck by the disabling hypnotic power unleashed by the unwitting imprecise use of language in a family session recently. Each member sincerely expressed that they wanted peace and even gave a brief explanation of why they valued it. But they were in my office because they did not have peace and were constantly fighting.

How to Get What We Want 

Wanting vs. Having -- I hear it from almost every client, but hearing it from all these people at once somehow made it a fresh new phenomenon. This is one way I like to look at the problem:
......CLICK HERE TO READ JACK ELIAS' ARTICLE

ROBERT REDFORD'S MOVIE: STAND WITH HIM AND DEMAND CLIMATE ACTION!!!



When I was about 28 and happily single, Robert Redford was the hottie of the screen, and I was certainly one of his greatest fans.  At the time, I was working in a huge hotel, multiplex in nature.  It was absolutely my favorite part-time job, ever.  Since it was near a theatre/entertainment center, the hotel has numerous celebrities as their guests. Almost any job in that sphere intersected in some service manner with the stars on a daily basis.

One evening, I was told to take room service to one Robert Redford! Ecstatic was certainly my core emotion!  So, I rang his doorbell with his food.  The person who answered was somewhat of a surprise to me.  First, he was very average height, and I had expected the the immensely tall person of my projections.  Well, okay...

Then I expected a degree of patronizing, detached response we had from many stars, no matter how perfect one had made the service. Not so, by any means.  I certainly anticipated a brief, gentlemanly acceptance of his food.  But Redford was amazingly gracious, friendly, and one would have thought he was that favorite older cousin you looked up to.  Warm, respectful, and witty, yet he was serious, intentional, and seemingly with substance.  I intuited  after several minutes that Redford had substance and character far deeper than a generic Hollywood image. Generally, I am pretty spot on with that, once I get my projections out of the way!

Redford took a few extra minutes to chat.  Immediately engaging in a very authentic manner, I was a bit wistful that ....  the job was done.For decades since then, I been interested in Redford's intense advocacy on many levels.  I sense he is the real deal.

I offer this movie created by him, as Trustee of NRDC (Natural Resoures Defense Council). While brief, it makes the point and needs to be heard. 

Friday, December 11, 2015

Bernie Sanders Will Become President, Despite Rigged Debate Schedules, Skewed Polls, and Clinton's 'Inevitability' | H. A. Goodman

To certain people, Hillary Clinton is definitely going to win, simply because of poll numbers. However, people forget that in December of 2007, Gallup reported Clinton Maintains Large Lead Over Obama Nationally. Of course, in American society today, looking back only eight years is ancient history.   

CLICK HERE TO READ RATIONALE

Sunday, December 6, 2015

Native Hawaiian Spirituality. Researching When the Words Aren't There | Sarah Beck

BY 
Master of Divinity student at the University of Chicago Divin

2015-11-26-1448506960-2520464-IMG_3651.jpg
There are downsides to being a graduate student. Debt, for starters. Sanskrit translations take a close second. And of course endless reading that has caused me to despise all forms of outside "pleasure" reading. (As if in my spare time - which isn't as plentiful as my working friends would like to imagine - I want to sit down and read a magazine or book. For fun. Ha!)
There are some upsides as well. Long summers. The opportunity to spend years studying a subject that intellectually stimulates me. And, my favorite of all, research. Oh, how I love research!
You may be thinking, "Oh how great for you, Sarah. We're all so thrilled that you get to leave the bitter cold of the Midwest and study in beautiful, tropical places like Hawaii." I get it, I get it, mainly because I hear it weekly from divinity school classmates who are bundled up in Chicago as I Skype in for class with waving palm trees as my backdrop.
I am here to tell you, however, that contrary to popular belief, sunshine and surfers are not the reason I am in Hawaii. (Although those don't hurt.) I am in Hawaii because I feel drawn to these islands. As I begin to dig into what it means to be Hawaiian, which in one native Hawaiian's words, is to be able to connect to the land, and the water and the sky and the sea, the more I realize that if this is research, I want to be a researcher forever.
It is an immense honor to learn the history, culture, and spirituality of native Hawaiians from native Hawaiians, not from the neatly packaged missionary and colonizer versions. Yet, as I embark on this journey, I am left with a set of nagging questions: What exactly am I researching (I can sense how thrilled my professors are to read this), and how do I quantify my experience? As I mull over these questions, I am reminded of a brief encounter I had a few months back at a hospital in Chicago.
"On a scale of 1-10, what level of pain are you currently experiencing?" the nurse asked me one miserable afternoon as I sat holding my screaming index finger wrapped in a bloody bandage - raw, wounded, and now without a fingernail.
"Well, what's a 10?" I countered, images of torture victims and horrific car accidents and raging fires coming to mind. "The worst pain you've ever experienced," she answered.
My mind, despite the intensifying throbbing sensation in my hand, contemplated for a moment. Did heartache count? Or the death of a loved one? Or the loss of a childhood dream? "I guess a 2.5," I responded sheepishly.
I realized in that moment that it is extremely difficult to accurately describe pain. Medical professionals are certainly making strides to help give language to the varied manifestations of pain in order to provide more effective and appropriate treatment to patients. Yet, with so many types of pain - physical, emotional, and psychological - and so many ways to experience it, how many words do we actually have at our disposal to accurately describe the depth of our sufferings?
I'm finding this same phenomenon - this inability to articulate an inner knowing to others - present in the sphere of divinity studies as I move around these islands attempting to complete research on native Hawaiian spirituality. After all, what isspirituality? How do we describe it? Measure it? Prove its existence? How do we separate it from the study of culture, and language, and institutionalized religion? What makes one person more spiritual than another (does such a distinction exist?) or adamantly "spiritual but not religious?"
As the weeks pass, and I realize that the answers to these questions are both beautifully and exasperatingly elusive, I open myself to the possibility of being on this quest for a while, which, of course is fine by me. While the locale may not always be as beautiful as Hawaii, for now - as my friends back home deal with the aftermath of the first snow of the season and break in their new winter boots - I'll happily soak in the sunshine and aloha spirit from this side of the world. All in the name of research, of course.  CLICK HERE TO READ MORE

Sunday, November 29, 2015

Let's Pretend- Michael Crawford - YouTube

This is one of my favorite melodies about our children.  There is an optimistic defiance ... sort of a celebratory visualization ... in the context of the song.

I was at a Thankgsgiving F-E-A-S-T this past week.  It was not only a feast of food, although it surely was that.  From any aspect, it was very clear about the abundant outcomes that happen when we humans join forces.... for anything.

I experienced a group of people, thankfully all very human.....but it was the tapestry of their individual divinities  that showered over all of me. As I slept that evening, it was like "visions of sugar plums dancing in my head", as I would remember one moment after another.

The man who asked the blessing gave his own special brand of depth and insight to the day: a total gift.  Until then, I had always seen his ready wit, sense of "I'm in" fun, and athletic, buffed appearance.  I am not really sure what I expected from his blessing over family and food, but profound is what I got!  He later teased that he had shortened it somewhat, because he usually got the collective "throat clearing" of the family members eager to "dig in".  I have to say, I was wishing he had gone longer.

What amazed me throughout the day, and which was very different than my own very extended family, was the mature, and even sacred, way they had of putting aside the everyday silliness of the "stuff" we humans manage to inflict on one another.  Oh, sure, there were teeny, almost imperceptible, ripples ... but those were so fleeting and brief.  Why?  The underpinning of caring, respect, and love trumped that.  We even got into some family pictures towards the end of the evening .... the biggest gift here?  It was what the family members pointed out was really important over the years. Therein was the sacredness...and the Divine at work.

This family redefined my concept of family, love, and strength.  I still feel a high measure of enjoyment from that extended family who know what the priorities  in this life are.  They knew the vississitudes, the bumps in the road ... all of that.  That, for me is what defines heroines and heros: those people who literally smirk at what life sometimes throws our way ... that which could buckle the best of us.  In the most blessed character, these people showed me how they stand indomitably and indestructibly .. and try to keep character and compassion as their staunch and main theme.

They know who they are, this family of five adult children, all raised by their single mom.  This family tries very hard to make the lyrics of this song come alive. Simply compelling!

And so, this family made "let's pretend"...very REAL!

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN, AND READ FURTHER

Saturday, November 28, 2015

Giving Thanks for a Nation of Migrants, Refugees, and Immigrants | The Nation

 "The Pilgrims were, of course, migrants seeking refuge from intolerance and threats, hardship and violence. It is the recollection of their experience that underpins the deeply rooted American values not just of welcoming the stranger but of respecting religious diversity...."

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Is Narcissism Genetic? - The Narcissistic Life

"Can you inherit narcissism? Is it genetically-based? These are questions that have some scientists, geneticists and researchers searching for answers. The exact cause of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is not known. However, most researchers and mental health professionals believe it results from a combination of factors. These factors include biological vulnerability, social interactions with early caregivers, and psychological factors that involve temperament. There are studies that suggest that a gene (or genes) for narcissism can be inherited but tha..."

Is Narcissism Genetic? - The Narcissistic Life

Wednesday, November 25, 2015

"6 Types of Emotional Abuse" / found on afternarcissisticabuse.wordpress.com


6 Types of Emotional Abuse by Narcissistic Parents

1. REJECTING 
Narcissistic Parents or caregivers who display rejecting behavior toward a child will often [purposefully or unconsciously] let a child know, in a variety of ways, that he or she is unwanted. Putting down a child’s worth or belittling their needs is one form these types of emotional abuse may take. Other examples can include telling a child to leave or worse, to get out of your face, calling him names or telling the child that he is worthless, making a child the family scapegoat or blaming him for family/sibling problems. Refusing to talk to or holding a young child as he or she grows can also be considered abuse.
    • constant criticism
    • name-calling
    • telling child he/she is ugly
    • yelling or swearing at the child
    • frequent belittling and use of labels such as “stupid” or “idiot”
    • constant demeaning jokes
    • verbal humiliation
    • constant teasing about child’s body type and/or weight
    • expressing regret the child wasn’t born the opposite sex
    • refusing hugs and loving gestures
    • physical abandonment
    • excluding child from family activities
    • treating an adolescent like he is a child
    • expelling the child from the family
  • not allowing a child to make his own reasonable choices
2. IGNORING 
Adults who have had few of their emotional needs met are often unable to respond to the needs of their children. They may not show attachment to the child or provide positive nurturing. They may show no interest in the child, or withhold affection or even fail to recognize the child’s presence. Many times the parent is physically there but emotionally unavailable. Failing to respond to or interact with your child, consistently, constitutes emotional and psychological abuse.
    • no response to infant’s spontaneous social behaviors
    • failure to pay attention to significant events in child’s life
    • lack of attention to schooling, peers, etc.
    • refusing to discuss your child’s activities and interests
    • planning activities/vacations without including your child
    • not accepting the child as an offspring
    • denying required health care
    • denying required dental care
    • failure to engage child in day to day activities
  • failure to protect child
3. TERRORIZING
Parents who use threats, yelling and cursing are doing serious psychological damage to their children. Singling out one child to criticize and punish or ridiculing her for displaying normal emotions is abusive. Threatening a child with harsh words, physical harm, abandonment or in extreme cases death is unacceptable. Even in jest, causing a child to be terrified by the use of threats and/or intimidating behavior is some of the worst emotional abuse. This includes witnessing, hearing or knowing that violence is taking place in the home.
    • excessive teasing
    • yelling, cursing and scaring
    • unpredictable and extreme responses to a child’s behavior
    • extreme verbal threats
    • raging, alternating with periods of warmth
    • threatening abandonment
    • berating family members in front of or in ear range of a child
    • threatening to destroy a favorite object
    • threatening to harm a beloved pet
    • forcing child to watch inhumane acts
    • inconsistent demands on the child
    • displaying inconsistent emotions
    • changing the “rules of the game”
    • threatening that the child is adopted or doesn’t belong
    • ridiculing a child in public
    • threatening to reveal intensely embarrassing traits to peers
  • threatening to kick an adolescent out of the house
FACT: Children and youth who witness family violence experience all six types of emotional abuse.
4. Isolating
A parent who abuses a child through isolation may not allow the child to engage in appropriate activities with his or her peers; may keep a baby in his or her room, not exposed to stimulation or may prevent teenagers from participating in extracurricular activities. Requiring a child to stay in his or her room from the time school lets out until the next morning, restricting eating, or forcing a child to isolation or seclusion by keeping her away from family and friends can be destructive and considered emotional abuse depending on the circumstances and severity.
    • leaving a child unattended for long periods
    • keeping a child away from family
    • not allowing a child to have friends
    • not permitting a child to interact with other children
    • rewarding a child for withdrawing from social contact
    • ensuring that a child looks and acts differently than peers
    • isolating a child from peers or social groups
    • insisting on excessive studying and/or chores
    • preventing a child from participating in activities outside the home
  • punishing a child for engaging in normal social experiences
5. Corrupting
Parents who corrupt may permit children to use drugs or alcohol, watch cruel behavior toward animals, watch or look at inappropriate sexual content or to witness or participate in criminal activities such as stealing, assault, prostitution, gambling, etc.
Encouraging an underage child to do things that are illegal or harmful is abusive and should be reported.
    • rewarding child for bullying and/or harassing behavior
    • teaching racism and ethnic biases or bigotry
    • encouraging violence in sporting activities
    • inappropriate reinforcement of sexual activity
    • rewarding a child for lying and stealing
    • rewarding a child for substance abuse or sexual activity
    • supplying child with drugs, alcohol and other illegal substances
  • promoting illegal activities such as selling drugs
6. Exploiting
Exploitation can be considered manipulation or forced activity without regard for a child’s need for development. For instance, repeatedly asking an eight-year-old to be responsible for the family’s dinner is inappropriate. Giving a child responsibilities that are far greater than a child of that age can handle or using a child for profit is abusive.
    • infants and young children expected not to cry
    • anger when infant fails to meet a developmental stage
    • a child expected to be ‘caregiver’ to the parent
    • a child expected to take care of younger siblings
    • blaming a child for misbehavior of siblings
    • unreasonable responsibilities around the house
    • expecting a child to support family financially
    • encouraging participation in pornography
  • sexually abusing child or youth
Credit to teach through love. com

"there were no words, but images flooded every cell in her being ...4 and a half decades!"

"there were no words, but images flooded every cell in her being ...4 and a half decades!"