• Certified Transpersonal Hypnotherapist ; Past experiences: Dream Analysis /10 Years Experience •Psychotherapist / Use of Gestalt, Jungian, Zen, Reality and Energy Therapies /10 Years Experience •EMDR • Men and Their Journey: the neuroscience of the male brain, and the implications in sexuality, education and relationship • Women: Their Transformation and Empowerment ATOD (Alcohol, Tobacco and Other Drugs) / 21 years experience •Ordained Interfaith Minister & Official Celebrant • Social Justice Advocate • Child and Human Rights Advocate • Spiritual Guide and Intuitive • Certified Reiki Practitioner • Mediation / Conflict Resolution • “Intentional Love” Parenting Strategy Groups • Parenting Workshops • Coaching for parents of Indigo, Crystal, and Rainbow Children • International Training: Israel & England • Critical Incident Stress Debriefing • Post-911 and Post-Katrina volunteer

MSW - UNC Chapel Hill

BSW - UNC Greensboro

"An Unending Love"

This blog and video is devoted and dedicated to my daughter, my grand daughters, and my grand son. They are hearts of my heart. Our connection through many lives..... is utterly infinite.

The Definition of Genius


"ONLY LOVE PREVAILS" ...."I've loved you for a thousand years; I'll love you for a thousand more....."

The degree of our enlightenment is the degree of passion that we will have for the whole world." ~The Greystone Mandala

~The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.

Winston Churchill

"Do not go gentle into that good night, Old age should burn and rave at close of day; Rage, rage against the dying of the light. Do not go gentle into that good night."

Dylan Thomas


In “Conversations with God”, by Neale Donald Walsch, there is a warning I think of. I refer to it as the Atlantis passage, and I've quoted it a few times before." As I have said, this isn't the first time your civilization has been at this brink,"

God tells Walsch. "I want to repeat this, because it is vital that you hear this. Once before on your planet, the technology you developed was far greater than your ability to use it responsibly. You are approaching the same point in human history again. It is vitally important that you understand this. Your present technology is threatening to outstrip your ability to use it wisely. Your society is on the verge of becoming a product of your technology rather than your technology being a product of your society. When a society becomes a product of its own technology, it destroys itself."

Thursday, December 22, 2011

I love you, I am sorry, I forgive you, thank you........

It seems more and more that the holidays are becoming mercenary, and sanitized of human compassion and love. People attack each other in stores, for a gift for themselves .. and other head-shaking tales become a norm, rather than a bizarre incident. 
   As a mom, who loved the entire season and celebrated the last quarter of the year, I have found it curious that many parents I observe in public are so focused with 'eyes on the prize'... the material prize.  As they walk, they appear to be oblivious to the holiday's joys through the eyes of the smallest members of their family. Their toddler's cries which are so obviously ones of exhaustion and sensory stimulation, yet go unheeded (at best) or greeted with a Merry Christmas smack on the butt.  Antithetical. Simply antithetical.  
   I just read an article about a Vet who came home, and sold one of his two Purple Hearts to be able to afford some food and gifts for his young family. I admit that took my breath away.  Antithetical. Simply antithetical.
   The holidays, at the very least, are a reminder (allegedly) of the higher sides of us ... some days to reflect on who we are.....even if that reflection takes place cooking a turkey, or wrapping of gifts. What have our minds become that we cannot 'take custody' of them, if you will such a manner?
   This post, one of Ho'Oponopono, is one I post at least twice a year.  It seems timely to do so again. 

     Both as a therapist and a human being, it is an interesting clue to me when folks are uncomfortable with regular use of, "I'm sorry" or "Thank you".  However this blog is not for the psychological hints of character.  It is about a celebration for those who can do that, or who actively aspire to and work towards that.
     A couple of years ago, a good friend introduced me to Ho'Oponopono.  I had never heard of the Hawaiian practice until then, but I discovered it to be immensely healing and with a strong code of personal accountability all at the same time. It is used, among other things, as a form of therapy. me it certainly is.  Some (me included) initially discovered a little resistance to saying (even in private) "I'm sorry" or "I thank you" or "I forgive you" or "I love you" someone who might have egregiously hurt us.  Therein lies a real point of exploration and personal truth ... and squaring with the Universe!    While I believe some faith in a higher power is likely necessary to truly feel the impact of the process, I think the exercise is immensely humbling, empowering, loving, compassionate ... all at once. Sometimes Ho'Oponopono can seem simple and esoteric at the same time. When we have accountability for our human actions is loving and freeing all at once.

     I am including the video in this blog (above). I shared it with my adolescent male group therapy, actually wondering what the reaction would be.  I was surely surprised with the comments they made to me, one by one, after the group.  As I would hear what they had to say about their experiences, I was joyful.

     I made a practice to play it most evenings as I would fall asleep ... it simply seemed to provide great clarity and comfort to me.  The practice really makes life simple in its own way.  The above meditation also has some directions for EFT, so if you have not experienced that,  just focus on the actual meditation.

     Here is a paste from one of the sites which "breaks it down" into simplicity.  Exploring other sites is also immensely uplifting and :



Ho'oponopono (Ho oponopono, Hooponopono) is a process for solving problems. But ho'oponopono does more than just solve problems - it's a means for getting aligned with existence. This might sound complicated or "out there" and maybe it is, but ho'oponopono isn't necessarily easy to put into a neat little package. The truth is, ho'oponopono is both simple and complex. Most important of all, ho'oponopono (ho oponopono, hooponopono) is a big help.


If you were looking for the key aspect of ho'oponopono, it's probably this: everything comes from you. Within ho'oponopono this is often referred to as 100% responsibility, and it means that every problem you experience is happening because of you. It's a safe bet that ho'oponopono wasn't intended to win popularity contests, because telling someone they are responsible for every problem that's experienced is a sure way to meet up with some strong resistance and also rejection.

Though it is often held up as a virtue, individual responsibility is almost never meant to convey 
absoluteindividual responsibility. In fact, some people who are heavily into the idea of responsibility will place blame on others very quickly. This may seem completely reasonable to these people and to many others too; but placing blame like this is in opposition to the ho'oponopono (ho oponopono, hooponopono) belief system. In ho'oponopono the problem is never with someone else - it's in you.


Can a person not accept 100% responsibility and still practice the ho'oponopono method? Yes. But the belief here is that seeing circumstances as being caused by external events, while at the same trying to use ho'oponopono, is neutralizing the method's effects. You simply can't apply ho'oponopono in full, and probably not even close to full, if you're looking external for causes. Responsibility is too key to how ho'oponopono works.

For those who might reject ho'oponopono 100% responsibility, it may help to know that 100% responsibility in ho'oponopono (ho oponopono, hooponopono) is not the same as blame. You don't need to blame yourself for problems - just know that problems you experience are there for you to resolve.


Putting ho'oponopono into practice is not difficult, though it can take discipline. Problems are going to come up, and maybe even come up a lot. The way to resolve problems with ho'oponopono is to use ho'oponopono and to keep using it. This might feel burdensome to some people, but sticking to it ultimately brings about problem resolution and an enhanced life experience overall. The results from using ho'oponopono on a consistent basis can be quite incredible. So how to use ho'oponopono?

Ho'oponopono can be applied through different processes. Mentally saying 'I love you, I'm sorry, please forgive me, thank you' is a ho'oponopono process. Drinking what's referred to as blue solar water -- tap water poured into a blue glass bottle and set in the sun or under a non fluorescent light for an hour or more -- is considered to be a ho'oponopono (ho oponopono, hooponopono) process. The key to these and any other ho'oponopono process is consistent application. The more you put ho'oponopono to use, the more you can experience life changing results.

"there were no words, but images flooded every cell in her being ...

"there were no words, but images flooded every cell in her being ...