"SIMPLY COMMUNICATING"

By Lloyd J. Thomas, Ph.D.

       Communication defines the quality of our relationships.

Communication is the "stuff of life."  In all the psychological

studies that have been done describing "satisfying relationships,"

only one dynamic appears in all relationships studied: daily effective

communication.  There are only two principles of effective

communication: sharing information and exchanging care.  Since sharing

is a mutual activity, when we share information, we listen first.  We

open our minds and hearts to what is true, necessary and nurturing.

We seek first to understand what our partner is communicating.  That

understanding requires focused listening.  Secondly, we speak of our

own thoughts, feelings, needs and desires.  We speak honestly,

clearly, directly and expect to be understood.

       When we exchange care, we label our love for each other without fear of the other's response.  We listen to the other's heartfelt

communication.  Then we express our genuine compassion for the other

and his/her well-being.

       In our childhood families, simple communication is often absent.

Accurate, simple information is not always shared.  Caring is not

always exchanged.  When hidden motives, double meanings, deception,

lies, secrets and manipulations characterize our family patterns of

communication, we grow up listening for what is not said, what is

really meant, what might hurt us, and what we may need to protect

ourselves from.  The focus of our attention is not on the simple, the

obvious, the present.  When other family members never listened to us,

we felt unimportant, neglected and not worthy of attention and care.

       We often make our lives more complicated than they need be.  When

our childhood is distressed, we often overlook the power of the single

action, the simple sentence, the uncomplicated gesture.  We don't

trust the simple.  We find only the complex is of value.  We pride

ourselves in the complexity of our minds, our relationships and our

lifestyles.  We fail to appreciate simple elegance.  We miss the

beauty of a caring gesture.  We miss the healing of a single word or

touch.  We miss the fulfillment of an honest, loving moment.  When we

are attentive to the simplicity of the moment, alive to the present

instant, it becomes more difficult, if not impossible, to view life

through the lens of our past.  Memories and habits of our childhood

have less impact on our present lives.

       Life itself is very simple.  We are the ones that make it

complicated.  Here are some simple, but powerful principles, simply

expressed, any one of which, if followed, can make a profoundly

positive difference in your life.

       Speak the truth.  Love your neighbor as yourself.  Revere Life.

Simplify.  Be happy.  Enjoy yourself.  Travel lightly.  Act kindly.

Be gentle.  Breathe deeply.  Focus your attention.  Be aware.  Learn

through practice.  Take action.  Exercise.  Eat right.  You reap what

you've sown.  Take charge of yourself.  Act compassionately.  Know

yourself.  Make a plan.  Think ahead.  Laugh a lot.  Be fully

conscious.  Practice creativity.  Accept everything, condone little.

Read great books.  Forgive everything.  Judge not.  Be peaceful

inside.  Be a friend.  Cooperate.  Fear not.  Share.  Learn as you go.

 Make conscious choices.  Preserve nature.  Understand natural laws.

Make music.  Live abundantly.  Death is inevitable.  Care for

children.  Perform useful work.  Practice stillness.  Be well.  Take

full responsibility for yourself.  Accumulate only what you need.  Let

go of the past.  Live in the present moment.  Think positive thoughts.

 Do small things with great caring.  Be generous.  Know yourself.  Be

curious.  Appreciate the little things.  Dream big dreams.  Risk

making mistakes.  Create your happiness.  Pursue your envisioned

future.

       Pastoral counselor, Wayne Muller writes, "When our eye is attuned

only to things dramatic, sophisticated, or spectacular, we may miss

the birth of something strong, simple, and beautiful right in front of

us."

       Communicate information and care with simplicity and truthfulness.

Make your communication reflect both your heart and your intellect,

and your relationships to yourself, others, and the world will

dramatically improve, perhaps even be healed.

       Henry David Thoreau wrote, "Go confidently in the direction of your

dreams.  As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be

simpler."  Communicate simply. Live simply.  Live and communicate in

the present, while dreaming a brighter future, and you will certainly

experience more joy about your being alive.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Dr. Thomas is a licensed psychologist, author, speaker, and life

coach.  He serves on the faculty of the International University of

Professional Studies. He recently co-authored (with Patrick Williams)

the book: "Total Life Coaching: 50+ Life Lessons, Skills and

Techniques for Enhancing Your Practice...and Your Life!" (W.W. Norton

2005) It is available at your local bookstore or on Amazon.com.

"The Proof That We Are Sheep" (Shoeple)....by Steve Beckow

9/11 Commissioner Slips, Says Missile Used Against Pentagon

9/11 Commissioner Tim Roemer slips up and names the machine that struck the Pentagon as a missile, instead of an airplane. Oh, well, tangled webs.
Click here to view the embedded video.
Here is an analysis of why an airliner could not have hit the Pentagon that day.
Click here to view the embedded video.

I just had a discussion with a reader on the objections to the theory that a plane was used against the Pentagon. Here is a summary of the objections to that theory.

There are several problems with the explanation that a plane hit the Pentagon. One is that no wreckage of a plane has ever been found. If a plane had hit, there would be bodies of passengers, seats, baggage, tail assembly, wings. They would been all over the place and prominent in pictures of the site.

A second is that the marks on the building are not consistent with a plane. There are no indications that the wings or tail assembly struck the building.

A third is that there are no marks on the ground consistent with a plane flying that low. The jet would have had to come so close to the ground that the grass would show indications of it.

A fourth is that there was no fire at the Pentagon consistent with a plane carrying that amount of jet fuel, as compared say with the explosion at the World Trade Center when planes hit them. You can see that a book still sits on a filing cabinet next to the building and a wooden desk is not even singed. Papers are strewn about indicating that no fire took place.

A fifth is that Hani Hanjour could not have flown a plane that had to make those maneuvers. He did not have the skills to have flown it in such a tight circle as it made on approach or so low to the ground.  In fact few well-trained pilots could have flown that flight pattern in a passenger airliner.

A sixth is that the FBI have never released any of the security tapes that would confirm that a plane hit and would be expected to if they wanted to settle the question.

There are increasing numbers of professional organizations, be they architects, space engineers, pilots, firefighters, and others who are convinced about the truth being covered up.


If you are more curious, watch "Loose Change", FINAL cut....available on the web, or on a CD.  The folks that made this were so conscientious that the made it several times....each time following questions that people wanted to see documented more empirically.  They responded to each challenge, and recreated the film, time after time, in their quest for perfection in reporting.


If you watch it, you will find a compelling film and proven facts....you will forever then see life just a bit differently.  My only advice is to PAY ATTENTION!  It is not a film to "drowse" to....there are too many details that are amazingly shocking, and the creators put as much in as they could.  You need a fresh and alert mind!


After viewing it, if you are not impatient about questions...many, many questions, being answered, you might as well just return to sleep....for it will be some time before you are AWAKE (conscious)!


http://www.loosechange911.com/

"Tea Party in Full Meltdown Over Boehner's Cave"

by "joelgp" Daily Kos


http://www.dailykos.com/story/2011/04/09/965129/-Tea-Party-in-Full-Meltdown-over-Boehners-Cave

YEAH!!!! What a wonderful way to start a day by kicking off the endorphins through laughter!

"Just the Facts, Ma'am!!!"

Before we get bounced around (yet again) on a turbulent sea of "non- facts", let us not forget these simple ones:

• when Bush, Sr. left office he left a......... $290 BILLION DEFICIT
• when Clinton left office, he left a......$236 BILLION SURPLUS
• when Bush, Jr. left office he had burned through all of that surplus, PLUS left a ......$1.2 TRILLION DEFICIT !!!!!
• THIS is what Obama inherited!

(On THAT note, Eisenhower was the last Republican president to balance the budget!!)

(These were checked through Politifact!)

NOW, the Republicans deflect that horror by pretending they are competent financial stewards (seriously ?!?!?!?), but they do this by viciously attacking 

1. Only 12% of the budget is what they fight about NOW.......and that portion is what affects women, children, troops, seniors, the poor, and the most economically fragile in our land.
2. The OTHER 88%, about which Obama fiercely toes in about, is the percentage that contains the trillions of dollars of breaks to the uber-wealthy.

Be sure you know what the "riders" really are: 

a CLASS and GENDER WAR!


If you believe this is an extreme view, you clearly have not done your homework as a citizen!


What in the world makes the common U.S. voter so passive?  What makes them so disinterested and lacking in compassion about their :endangered species?

North Carolina Criminalizing Non-Conventional Medical Practitioners

North Carolina Criminalizing Non-Conventional Medical Practitioners

"How to Fix Congress!"

I received this in my email today, but do not know the author, nor do I have any resource indicating where it was published.  That said, that individual has some ideas which are spot on, in my view.  Thus, I pass his/her concept on to you.

Congressional Reform Act of 2011

1. Term Limits.

12 years only, one of the possible options below:

A. Two Six-year Senate terms
B. Six Two-year House terms
C. One Six-year Senate term and three Two-Year House terms

2. No Tenure / No Pension.

A Congressman collects a salary while in office and receives no pay when
they are out of office.

3. Congress (past, present & future) participates in Social Security.

All funds in the Congressional retirement fund move to the Social
Security system immediately. All future funds flow into the Social Security
system, and Congress participates with the American people.

4. Congress can purchase their own retirement plan, just as all Americans do.

5. Congress will no longer vote themselves a pay raise. Congressional pay
will rise by the lower of CPI or 3%.

6. Congress loses their current health care system and participates in the same health
care system as the American people.

7. Congress must equally abide by all laws they impose on the American people.

8. All contracts with past and present Congressmen are void effective 1/1/12.

The American people did not make these contracts with Congressmen. Congressmen made all these contracts for themselves.

Serving in Congress is an honor, not a career. The Founding Fathers envisioned citizen legislators, so ours should serve their term(s), then go home and back to work.

If each person contacts a minimum of twenty people then it will only take three days for most people (in the U.S. ) to receive the message. Maybe it is time!

A Primer on Class Struggle | Common Dreams

A Primer on Class Struggle | Common Dreams

"When Are We Going to Level the Playing Field?" HUH? HUH?

No one has been able to explain to me why young men and women serve in the U.S. Military for 20 years, risking their lives protecting freedom, and only get 50% of their pay. While politicians hold their political positions in the safe confines of the capital, protected by these same men and women, and receive full pay retirement after serving one term. It just does not make any sense.

Monday on Fox news they learned that the staffers of Congress family members are exempt from having to pay back student loans. This will get national attention if other news networks will broadcast it. When you add this to the below, just where will all of it stop?

35 States file lawsuit against the Federal Government

Governors of 35 states have filed suit against the Federal Government for imposing unlawful burdens upon them. It only takes 38 (of the 50) States to convene a Constitutional Convention.

This will take less than thirty seconds to read. If you agree, please pass it on.

This is an idea that we should address.

For too long we have been too complacent about the workings of Congress. Many citizens had no idea that members of Congress could retire with the same pay after only one term, that they specifically exempted themselves from many of the laws they have passed (such as being exempt from any fear of prosecution for sexual harassment) while ordinary citizens must live under those laws. The latest is to exempt themselves from the Healthcare Reform... in all of its forms. Somehow, that doesn't seem logical. We do not have an elite that is above the law. I truly don't care if they are Democrat, Republican, Independent or whatever. The self-serving must stop.

If each person that receives this will forward it on to 20 people, in three days, most people in The United States of America will have the message.. This is one proposal that really should be passed around.

Proposed 28th Amendment to the United States Constitution: "Congress shall make no law that applies to the citizens of the United States that does not apply equally to the Senators and/or Representatives; and, Congress shall make no law that applies to the Senators and/or Representatives that does not apply equally to the citizens of the United States ."

The Army Video the Pentagon Does Not Want You to Watch

From Steve Beckow:
This video exposes the targeting of civilians in war zones, the poisoning of infants from depleted-uranium weapons, the use of the army to build an oil and drug empire, etc. It’s not for the faint of heart. Don’t watch it if you’re not willing to witness some pretty grim sights. But do watch if you want to know what I regard as the truth.  One statistic: 51% of tax dollars goes to military spending.

The Army Video the Pentagon Does Not Want You to Watch

Wits - Julia Sweeney "Sex Ed." Monologue

.....I'm just sayin'..........

 I opened up the online papers this morning to "CIA ON GROUND IN LIBYA".  My first reaction was "Yup!  Git 'er done!"  (This "done" part, I might add,  easily rides along side my peaceful, loving nature.  And I fully embrace it!!!)  At the same time, I can count on one hand the number of times I have specifically chosen to give this side a well-deserved "15 miutes" of mental attack mode!

I had many clients, generally women, who would say, "Oh, I could never be that mean (as someone in the media we discussed)....I couldn't kill anyone .... blah ... blah ... blah!"  My next question would be speculative, and along the lines of asking, "what if someone were to come along, when we were out with our child or grand child, and physically threaten them in front of us .... to punch them .... to try to kill them? "

 Well, thus began some work on the dualities of our human natures....the Jungian shadow side, would now became available to the client for her own scrutiny.  I had extra therapeutic fun in asking the client, hypothetically, what they would actually do in that situation. 

 I might then even say, "Is that all?"  

Or if the person would reply that they are not physically strong enough to help, I might then query, "Well, let's just suppose you were very strong ... even stronger that the attacker ...what might you imagine you might do?

(Let the games begin, folks! ) 

The client's ability to "draw blood" started to become apparent.  In the end, the lesson was that we don't want to 'stamp out' that fierce side of us, but to honor, train, and respect it.......for future possible use if the occasion arises! 

So, back to the news.  I am a very marginal (if at all) CIA fan, but sheesh......there are times. Further, I believe in transparency ... most of the time!

I read about all the furor about Obama's not being transparent during these times in the Middle East, and not telling the citizens E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G!  SERIOUSLY?  Have the shoeple lost their minds?!   Spell it  C-O-V-E-R-T, folks!  When will the common voter get that this part IS NOT our business....in the moment, at least.  That is, if we value our collective butts!

The common voter  ("shoeple") frequently reminds me of an out-of-control, unruly teen who runs their household, and has tantrums if he/she doesn't know the parents personal business!  Entitled, they want battles, forged skirmishes, and acknowledged primacy ..... announced and completed in FOUR days!  You're kidding me, right?!  Knee jerk need for satisfaction?!  Like folks on a cocaine quest!  Okay, I don't have enough coffee to go further.......but you get it, right?

Whether it's black ops or pink ops, CIA or any other necessarily covert group.....I wish them well, and have no particular need to know. We'll all know when the job is done.  Folks....let's sit back and "let go"....not of our power as a citizen, but about an area where full disclosure in the here and now........may be hazardous to our national health!!!