MY WORK ... MY PASSION

• Certified Transpersonal Hypnotherapist ; Past experiences: Dream Analysis /10 Years Experience •Psychotherapist / Use of Gestalt, Jungian, Zen, Reality and Energy Therapies /10 Years Experience •EMDR • Men and Their Journey: the neuroscience of the male brain, and the implications in sexuality, education and relationship • Women: Their Transformation and Empowerment ATOD (Alcohol, Tobacco and Other Drugs) / 21 years experience •Ordained Interfaith Minister & Official Celebrant • Social Justice Advocate • Child and Human Rights Advocate • Spiritual Guide and Intuitive • Certified Reiki Practitioner • Mediation / Conflict Resolution • “Intentional Love” Parenting Strategy Groups • Parenting Workshops • Coaching for parents of Indigo, Crystal, and Rainbow Children • International Training: Israel & England • Critical Incident Stress Debriefing • Post-911 and Post-Katrina volunteer

MSW - UNC Chapel Hill

BSW - UNC Greensboro


With immense love I wish Happy Birthday to my three grandchildren!

May 22: Brannock

May 30: Brinkley

June 12: Brogan

All three have birthdays in the same 22 days of the year ....what a busy time for the family!

"An Unending Love"

This blog and video is devoted and dedicated to my precious daughter Jennifer, my grand daughters Brogan and Brinkley, and my grand son Brannock. They are hearts of my heart. Our connection through many lives..... is utterly infinite.




The Definition of Genius

"THRIVE"

https://youtu.be/Lr-RoQ24lLg

"ONLY LOVE PREVAILS" ...."I've loved you for a thousand years; I'll love you for a thousand more....."


As we are in the winter of our lives, I dedicate this to Andrew, Dr. John J.C. Jr. and Gary W., MD, (who has gone on before us). My love and admiration is unfathomable for each of you..........and what you have brought into this world.....so profoundly to me.
The metaphors are rich and provocative; we're in them now. This world is indeed disappearing, and the richest eternal world awaits us!
The intensity, as was in each of the three of us, is in yellow!
In my heart forever.........

Slowly the truth is loading
I'm weighted down with love
Snow lying deep and even
Strung out and dreaming of
Night falling on the city
Quite something to behold
Don't it just look so pretty
This disappearing world

We're threading hope like fire

Down through the desperate blood
Down through the trailing wire
Into the leafless wood

Night falling on the city
Quite something to behold
Don't it just look so pretty
This disappearing world
This disappearing world


I'll be sticking right there with it
I'll be by y
our side
Sailing like a silver bullet
Hit 'em 'tween the eyes
Through the smoke and rising water
Cross the great divide
Baby till it all feels right

Night falling on the city
Sparkling red and gold
Don't it just look so pretty
This disappearing world
This
disappearing world
This disappearing world
This disappearing world


TECHNOLOGY..........

In “Conversations with God”, by Neale Donald Walsch, there is a warning I think of. I refer to it as the Atlantis passage, and I've quoted it a few times before." As I have said, this isn't the first time your civilization has been at this brink,"

God tells Walsch. "I want to repeat this, because it is vital that you hear this. Once before on your planet, the technology you developed was far greater than your ability to use it responsibly. You are approaching the same point in human history again. It is vitally important that you understand this. Your present technology is threatening to outstrip your ability to use it wisely. Your society is on the verge of becoming a product of your technology rather than your technology being a product of your society. When a society becomes a product of its own technology, it destroys itself."

Thursday, October 13, 2011

How Conservative Politicians Wait for God to Fix the Economy, With Frightening Results

The theology embraced by American religious conservatives may render them immune to evidence and reason when it comes to economic management.

continue reading........

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Actual audio: Herman Cain vs the protesters

Click here for some humorous (?) INSANITY!!!

Occupy Wall Street May Be Too Big To Fail


It’s not just Occupy Wall Street anymore.
According to occupytogether.org, there are nearly 500 cities in 46 states across the country that are currently running, or are planning Occupy events in the month of October. This is proof that Occupy Wall Street is growing, not only in its numbers, but in its ability to spread its message to as many Americans as possible in an attempt to end the financial manipulation of our government by those who bastardize the freedoms and ideals of the United States of America.
Continue reading.......

Saturday, October 8, 2011

"WITHHOLDING" and Emotional Abuse


Withholding...
The most common form of withholding is what we commonly call "the silent treatment," but withholding encompasses any unwillingness to express your true feelings. It is the dominant form of emotional abuse, and of passive-aggression. It includes an unwillingness to give support, praise, or positive attention to the people you love. It is not much less damaging when you use withholding on friends, co-workers, etc., for it also signals an inability to have appropriate human intimacy...the flaw of the withholder.  
We have all known someone, or may currently be experiencing someone's pattern of emotionally draining and hurtful behaviors. Many of you may have suddenly found yourselves at the other end of a chilly silence with no explanation. 
No one deserves to be subjected to withholding. Feeling ignored, disrespected, or shut out, and to not know why, is a terrible feeling. The first thing to remember if this is happening to you is that you are not to blame. You are caught in someone else's pain pattern. This person does not know how to express feelings in a healthy way probably because this is what they learned when she or he was a child. The second helpful thing to remember is that the withholder is acting out of pain. They are stuck in a habitual mode of response that is self-defeating and alienating to the people they love. Remembering this will help you feel compassion for the person hurting you. However, if you have suffered too long with this pattern, you may need to get some space. Take some time to look at your own patterns and understand why you have taken part in this drama. If you are dealing with people in a family situation, you can step up to the plate to help break the chain of this behavior pattern. 
At the same time, many of us will recognize our own tendency to withhold our emotions rather than express them. At times though, when one is in the process of attempting to mend these same relationships, they are in need of silence... but a constructive bout of silence is the key to distinguishing whether one is going to be helpful, or hurtful. 
Sometimes, people distance themselves and during this time force blame, rationalize their side of the disagreement and seek refuge and validation from those around them about the matter in question. Sometimes however, you may see that this is not the case at all. Perhaps, someone has taken themselves out of the equation to figure out where they went wrong, how they hurt those they love the most, and most importantly... how to begin to mend the broken bonds that were left in their narcissistic, self-absorbed mad dance. Often times, this continual pattern lands us at a spot of looking back at a path of emotional debris we trailed along the hurricane we call our life. It is devastating and miraculous in the same breath when we see this. 
Upon this realization, and if we are the "withholder", there is often a pronounced experience of almost clairvoyance insight from a never before seen perspective of neutrality. This position often has us looking at ourself as we truly are, and not who we have attempted to be for as long as we can remember. We often will experience this because we are tired of lying to ourselves, we have run into the truth about ourselves and wish to carry forward to rebuild the bonds which have subsequently deteriorated as a result of this pattern. 
Most of us have seen both sides of the withholding dilemna. Emotional pain is at the root of our tendency to withhold, and withholding causes pain to the people subjected to it. For the withholder, it is a means of pseudo-power and control (or so they believe). It is a dysfunctional pattern that creates a breakdown in communication and understanding. 
If, on the other hand, it is you that tends to withhold, understand that this is a learned response and it can be unlearned. Find safe places to begin to express all that you've been holding back. Begin to make an effort to say what you're feeling and thinking. Give praise to someone who deserves it. The more you do this, the healthier you and your relationships will become. What was learned over a course of a life cannot be changed overnight-remember, one day at a time. 

Occupy the Federal Reserve Launched by Alex Jones

The Intel Hub, Avalon, 10-5-11
In a historic development launched today, October 6, 2011, Alex Jones has called for an Occupy the FED campaign that is destined to go nationwide. Millions of people are now poised to join history in the making.




....continue reading .....

Not All Men Are Sex Crazed Horn Dogs, Not All Woman Are Prudes -- Yet Sexual Double Standards Rule Our Relationships

The sexual standard is something that creeps into our relationships and deteriorates our sex lives every time we double-check ourselves.....

Click to continue reading.......

Thanks to the FDA, You Really Have No Idea What's In Your Food | Food | AlterNet

An estimated 60 to 70 percent of processed foods contains genetically modified organisms, but unlike 50 other countries, the US doesn't require labeling.
Click link below to continue reading.........

Thanks to the FDA, You Really Have No Idea What's In Your Food | Food | AlterNet

Rand Paul Is Worried Occupy Wall Street Protesters Will Loot Rich People's IPhones | AlterNet

Just as crazy as his father!!!!!!
Rand Paul Is Worried Occupy Wall Street Protesters Will Loot Rich People's IPhones | AlterNet

6 Ways the Rich Are Waging a Class War Against the American People / Steve Beckow


There hasn’t been any organized, explicitly class-based violence in this country for generations, so what, exactly, does “class warfare” really mean? Is it just an empty political catch-phrase?
The American Right has decided that returning the tax rate paid by the wealthiest Americans from what it was during the Bush years (which, incidentally, featured the slowest.........(click link to continue).....
6 Ways the Rich Are Waging a Class War Against the American People

William Rivers Pitt: Class Warfare My A$$ by Steve Beckow

I have been saying this for years upon years, but it bears repeating: the most awesome, fearsome, and effective weapon in the arsenal of the modern Republican Party is their total, utter and complete lack of shame...................



http://stevebeckow.com/2011/10/william-rivers-pitt-class-warfare-my-ass/

Friday, October 7, 2011

10 Things to Know About Wall Street's Rapacious Attack on America

But now Americans are fighting back and there's no telling where Occupy Wall Street can lead.

.....continue reading .....

Thursday, October 6, 2011

5 Facts You Should Know About the Wealthiest One Percent of Americans

It may shock you to learn exactly how wealthy this top 1 percent of Americans is.
Continue reading ........

The Real Reason Why Police Cage Peaceful Protestors

With Occupy Wall Street protesters kettled on the Brooklyn Bridge this weekend, we look at how kettling was used on protesters during the London riots earlier this year.

Continue reading .....

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Van Jones on America's Uprising: It's Going Be an Epic Battle

Jones talked to AlterNet about the growing social movements for change, running real progressives in 2012, and how we can train a million new leaders.

Continue reading.....

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Why the Kochs (Tea Party) Want to Make Chris Christie President

Neither Romney nor Perry has done the one thing that truly excites the Koch brothers and their fellow deep-pocketed Christie fans: take on the public sector unions in a big way.

CONTINUE READING........

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Ron Paul, Rick Perry and Other Right Wingers Want to Turn Back the Clock to 1900 -- What Was Life Like Back Then? | Tea Party and the Right | AlterNet

Thank goodness for the progressive era, the New Deal and the Great Society, and heaven (or the founders) help us if we allow the demolition of their gains.

READ MORE.......

By Cutting Taxes on the Rich, We've Incentivized Greed--How Do We Return to Fairness?

The Right wants to return to the "happier days" of the 1950s--but forgets that one of the main reasons for that era's prosperity was very high taxes on the wealthy.


READ MORE.......

Thursday, September 22, 2011

What Awful Reality TV and Suburban Living Have to Do with the Tea Party's Lack of Empathy

The Tea Parties are partly a product of the suburbs, where social isolation leaves communication about social mores to reality TV. Is it any wonder the movement lacks empathy?

CLICK TO CONTINUE READING.....

Why the Anti-Science Creationist Movement Is So Dangerous

They want to wipe out all the findings of hundreds of years of scientific investigation and have taken to schools, the courts and political leaders to get things done.


READ MORE.......

The Elizabeth Warren Quote Every American Needs To See

The Elizabeth Warren Quote Every American Needs To See

10 Signs God Is Furious With the Right | Tea Party and the Right | AlterNet

Whatever disaster strikes, there's always an upside in religious rightland, always somebody to point the finger at with glee. Let's turn the tables.
 
 
 


 
 
 
 
Editor's note: the following is satire... for the most part.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Americans Actually Like What's In the American Jobs Act | AlterNet


 The New York Times/CBS News poll, released in full last night, has plenty of results you'd probably expect to see. President Obama's support continues to slip; Congress' support has fallen off a cliff; Dems are slightly more popular than Republicans (though both are unpopular); and an increasingly pessimistic public wants policymakers to work on jobs and the economy, not deficit reduction.
 But we knew all of that. What I found far more interesting are the specific economic policies the American mainstream supports.
On President Obama's American Jobs Act, for example

READ MORE.....

Gardasil HPV vaccines found contaminated with recombinant DNA that persists in human blood

(NaturalNews) In seeking answers to why adolescent girls are suffering devastating health damage after being injected with HPV vaccines, SANE Vax, Inc decided to have vials of Gardasil tested in a laboratory. There, they found over a dozen Gardasil vaccine vials to be contaminated with rDNA of the Human Papillomavirus(HPV). The vials were purchased in the United States,.....

READ MORE!

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Exclusive book excerpt: David Richo | Soul's Code


According to one of the leading psychotherapists and spiritual authors in the United States, trust is a four-fold path......


READ MORE...

Toronto Hearings to examine 'state crime' of 9/11

TORONTO — As people across Canada and the United States publicly remember the tragedy of 9/11 in the lead-up to its tenth anniversary this weekend, a small group in Toronto began a series of hearings Thursday to examine another angle altogether: the "myth" of 9/11 ......
READ MORE.....

Auto industry loans worked, Cantor angry about that

Rep. Eric Cantor wishes the Ford Focus was still being built in Mexico.

Cantor's plan........
READ MORE.......

Is Rick Perry's Budget Feeding Texas Wildfires? Local Fire Departments Suffer $23 Million in Cuts

In a summer of record drought and heat, did climate-change-denier Rick Perry's budget imperil public safety with millions in cuts to volunteer fire department coffers?
READ MORE...

The Bin Laden Cover-up / Pentagon Scrubs Documents to Hide Truth

Whistleblower says he was told to stop tracking Bin Laden and suspected al-Qaeda terrorists in the months prior to 9/11.

READ MORE...

Friday, September 16, 2011

Would God Be A Republican Or Democrat?

Would God Be A Republican Or Democrat?

The Power of Authentic Smiles / Guy Winch, PhD

Published on December 2, 2010 by Guy Winch, Ph.D. in The Squeaky Wheel


Because we view complaints as acts of self-assertion rather than the requests for help they indeed are, we often fail to utilize the most effective tool we have for eliciting help in complaint situations-conveying an implicit optimism about getting the outcome we want by using authentic smiles.
How smiles affect helping behaviorAuthentic smiles convey optimism and strong confidence that the complaint reciient will respond favorably to the issue we're presenting, thus making them more likely to do so. It all boils down to how authentic smiles effect our mood and the mood of those who are exposed to them. Authentic smiles have the power to elicit a reflexive response in the recipient-they smile back. Consequently, we can induce a better mood in others simply by flashing them authentic smiles. Smiles can be a powerful tool in complaint situations because people tend to be far more helpful when they are in a good mood.
The impact of mood on helping behavior has been demonstrated using mood enhancing devices such as sunshine and even cookies. Smiles are equally effective in inducing good mood and they have the added advantage of being readily available, glycemic friendly and weatherproof. The problem is that flashing an authentic smile is not necessarily easy after we've waited fifteen minutes to speak to the service representative we view as responsible for the fact that our new auto-drip coffee maker refuses to drip.
But let's think about that for a moment; is it fair to be angry with the service representative?
The person who can solve our problem is rarely the one who created itAlthough customer service employees do represent the company, their job is merely to resolve our complaints to the best of their ability using predetermined guidelines. Certainly, they did not manufacture the defective toaster oven that lobs our toast seven feet into the air, nor were they responsible for our St. Patrick's Day sweater arriving in pink instead of green. Similarly, the manager of the restaurant was not the one who spilled the beet soup on our wife's white dress and the municipality clerk was not the one who composed the 600 page permit application for repaving driveways.
Reminding ourselves of these facts will help us manage our frustration so we can flash an authentic smile at the manager or service representative and increase their motivation to help us. Authentic smiles are also called Duchenne smiles, for the French physician Guillaume Duchenne, who studied the physiology of facial expressions in the nineteenth century. The question is how does one tell the difference between an authentic smile and a forced one?
Why crow's feet are good for happiness despite what the Botox industry thinksTake a trip down memory lane and look at your class yearbook pictures from middle school (if your pictures are from the 70s or the 80s, try not to get too distracted by the hair...). It shouldn't take long for us to realize that we can indeed distinguish between authentic smiles and smiles that appear forced even if we cannot put our finger on exactly what it is that makes a smile seem un-authentic (and no, it's not the acne).
So, what does make a smile authentic? One basic thing-crow's feet. When the muscles around our mouth and lips try to go it alone by saying "Cheese!" our smile looks forced. But when we involve the muscles around our eyes and cheeks and create crow's feet, our smiles appear natural and authentic and they truly light up our faces.
Duchenne smiles are highly associated with happiness and not just because they affect our mood for the better. Studies found that people who displayed deeper crow's feet in their childhood pictures were less likely to divorce as adults than those whose childhood pictures had less intense crow's feet. And a study of smiles in pictures of baseball players found that players with deeper crow's feet lived five years longer on average than those with non-Duchenne smiles.
The steps for using authentic smiles in complaint situationsTo elicit good will in a complaint recipient our smiles must be authentic because only authentic smiles elicit authentic smiles in return. However, Duchenne smiles are not easy to fake and they can require some rehearsal to deliver convincingly. Following these steps will make you more likely to get the result you want and they will also make the entire complaint process far more pleasant for all concerned.
1. Start by practicing in the mirror. If making faces in the mirror makes you self-conscious, use a cell-phone camera to assess your progress. Try to involve your cheek muscles by thinking happy optimisitc thoughts such as I'm going to get a refund! or I hated that white dress anyway!2. The true test of any Duchenne smile is whether it elicits one in return. Take your Duchenne out for a spin. Practice on neighbors, colleagues or sale associates in stores (avoid sample sales-way too cutthroat and Darwinian). If your smile has deep crow's feet, theirs will too.
3. Once you've perfected your Duchenne smile and a complaint situation presents itself, make eye contact, say hello and flash the service representative or manager your best Duchenne smile. Then present your complaint in a calm and civil manner.
Smiles, like many effective complaining techniques, are simple tools we can all use. Indeed, once we acquire the right skill set, becoming an effective squeaky wheel, getting results and reaping emotional rewards by doing so, is often easier and more worthwhile than we realized.

Read my website blog to find out about my adventure practicing authentic smiles with the scariest worker at my local Post Office branch.
Follow me on Twitter @GuyWinch
Copyright 2010 Guy Winch
Abel, E. L., & Kruger, M. L. (2010). Smile intensity in photographs predicts longevity. Psychological Science 21 (4) 542-544
Hertenstein M.. J., et al (2009), Smile Intensity in Photographs predicts Divorce later in Life: Motivation and Emotion 33 (2) 99-105,

Rick Perry: Selling Sixth-Grade Girls' Health to the Highest Bidder? | | AlterNet

Perry's mandate of an HPV vaccine for young girls is part of a larger pattern of doing favors for campaign contributors--risks and conservative principles be damned.




CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE .......

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

This Week, Another Racist Execution Is Set to Take Place in TX Under Rick Perry | AlterNet

This Week, Another Racist Execution Is Set to Take Place in TX Under Rick Perry | AlterNet

An awareness-raising email!

ONE AT A TIME
  This probably sounds crazy, but just yesterday I was in
 Wal Mart looking for a wastebasket. I found some made in
 China for $6.99. I didn't want to pay that much so I asked the
 lady if they had any others. She took me to another department
 and they had some at $2.50 made in USA. They are just as good.

 Same as a kitchen rug I needed. I had to look, but I found some
 made in the USA and they were $3.00 cheaper.  
We are being brain washed that everything that comes from China and Mexico
 is cheaper. Not so. That is also why I don't buy cards at Hallmark
 anymore. They are made in China and are expensive. I buy
 them at Dollar Tree....50 cents each and made in USA.


 One Light Bulb at a Time
 A physics teacher in high school, once told the students that while one
 grasshopper on the railroad tracks wouldn't slow a train very much, a
 billion of them would.   With that thought in mind, read the following,
 obviously written by a good American . . .
 
Good idea . . .. one light bulb at a time . .. ..
 
 Check this out.  I can verify this because I was in Lowe’s the other day
 for some reason and just for the heck of it I was looking at the hose
 attachments... They were all made in China .

 The next day I was in Ace Hardware and just for the heck of it I checked
 the hose attachments there. They were made in USA. Start looking . . ...
 
 In our current economic situation, every little thing we buy or do
 affects someone else - even their job. So, after reading this email, I
 think this lady is on the right track..  Let's get behind her!
 
 My grandson likes Hershey's candy.  I noticed, though, that it is marked
 made in Mexico now. I do not buy it any more.
 
 My favorite toothpaste Colgate is made in Mexico... now I have switched
 to Crest.  You have to read the labels on everything....
 
 This past weekend I was at Kroger . . . I needed 60W light bulbs and
 Bounce dryer sheets.
 I was in the light bulb aisle, and right next to the GE brand I normally
 buy was an off-brand labeled, "Everyday Value." I picked up both types
 of bulbs and compared the stats  they were the same except for the
 price . . ..
 The GE bulbs were more money than the Everyday Value brand but the thing
 that surprised me the most was the fact that GE was made in MEXICO and
 the Everyday Value brand was made in - get ready for this - the USA in a
 company in Cleveland , Ohio.
 
 So throw out the myth that you cannot find products you use every day
 that are made right here...
 
 So on to another aisle - Bounce Dryer Sheets... yep, you guessed it,
 Bounce cost more money and is made in Canada... The Everyday Value brand
 was less money and MADE IN THE USA! I did laundry yesterday and the
 dryer sheets performed just like the Bounce Free I have been using for
 years and at almost half the price!
 
 My challenge to you is to start reading the labels when you shop for
 everyday things and see what you can find that is made in the USA - the
 job you save may be your own or your neighbors!

How to Live, Work, or Cope With a Control Freak — Self Help Daily


http://www.selfhelpdaily.com/self-help-articles/how-to-deal-with-control-freaks/
September 14, 2011

The following is a guest article by Mark Tyrrell from Hypnosis Downloads.com:
Five Steps for Dealing With a Manipulative Control Freak
by Mark Tyrrell
Control freaks don’t tend to make people around them happy. Okay, this is an understatement. Being in the constant orbit of a control freak can make you downright miserable.
Colleagues, friends, and partners can feel their every thought, action, and opinion is only valid if it concurs totally with the control freak’s take on things. We all need to feel we control some things to help us feel secure and safe; but the constant judging, micromanaging, interfering, bossiness, and manipulation of a dictatorial control freak goes way beyond this.
Feeling constantly judged, micromanaged, and manipulated eventually builds resentment, bitterness, and anxiety. The lack of tolerance or credit given for any initiative of our own makes us feel subjugated, like dejected subjects of some despotic ruler whose one role is to hear and obey. Remember that control freaks are “status junkies”. Anything they feel you say or do to undermine their own sense of inflated self won’t be tolerated, regardless of your thoughts and feelings.
And whether they intended to bully or not, the fallout is that people feel steamrollered and bullied.
So how can you best deal with a control freak?
Understand that yes, you are dealing with a control freak
No matter how intelligent, ingenious, and prone to being right your control freak is, despite all that or whether they are wonderfully helpful sometimes, you still have to deal with that controlling behavior, that tyrannical bit of them. Separate all the wonderful good they might be doing through their tremendous drive to get things done from the fact that you feel totally controlled by them.
We can make excuses for other people at the same time as they make us feel acutely bad. So right here and right now, whatever their “saving graces”, understand what you have to deal with by separating in your own mind the good stuff about them from this overbearing control.
Respect your own autonomy
We all need to feel a sense of independence and self-direction. Even if the control freak is your boss, don’t feel you have to automatically say yes to every little whim and demand.
A client of mine was amazed by the idea she could sometimes turn down her boss’s demand she do unpaid overtime after work. “Treat your boss’s unreasonable orders as if they were requests,” I suggested to her. Whenever he “ordered” her to work unpaid, she would tell him she’d get back to him about it after seeing whether it was possible. This started to alter “the game”. He began to appreciate she wasn’t a doormat.
Sometimes you have to force people into the situation of behaving decently rather than waiting until they “see the light”. If you don’t behave as if your own sense of autonomy is important, than neither will the dictator in your life.
Don’t always be “nice”
Control freaks don’t play by the rules of “niceness”. Helpfulness, a willingness to pull together and “not make waves”, is part of human nature. Many of us like to help if we can because we are “hard-wired” to. Human beings are social creatures and after all, we don’t want to hurt the control freak’s feelings.
But control freaks sometimes like to meet their match. They’ll respect people who have a will and mind of their own or even those who don’t overly care whether they are liked or respected by the CF. Control freaks are so hard to please that you might waste many lifetimes trying to please, placate, and pacify them only to inevitably fail. If someone is pathologically mean with their praise or consideration of your feelings and needs, then don’t treat them as if they are not like this.
Don’t argue; it won’t work
Don’t be too nice because control freaks don’t really work in the realms of “niceness” (as opposed to charm), but don’t get into long-winded arguments trying to justify your position, either. Control freaks are great at arguing why you and everyone else in the world should feel, think, do, and say just as they see fit. Just make your point once and keep coming back to it. If you don’t want to paint your bedroom wall the color they demand is best, then tell them so but don’t feel you have to justify your position. This “broken record technique” is hugely effective. Just state your position (“I want to paint my walls lime green!”) and repeat whatever they say. They’ll soon get bored.
Life’s too short
If you don’t have to have this person in your life, consider cutting them loose to go on their way dictating and steamrollering others. We risk becoming control freaks ourselves when we feel it’s our divine role to change them. We may help others to change by adjusting our own responses, but ultimately they are responsible for themselves.
Part of their journey to maturity needs to be a realization that other people are not just puppets to be bent to their will. This is how very small children may see the world, but a mature human being knows what they can and cannot influence and control.
Some control freaks really do want to change and they might need help. I am reminded of the cartoon in which a man tells his wife: “You know, my New Year’s resolution is to stop telling you what to do all the time and I’ve also written down what your New Year’s resolutions are going to be!”
Mark Tyrrell is a trainer, therapist and author and co-founder of Hypnosis Downloads.com where he has created downloads on How to deal with the control freak and other difficult people.

"The Control Freak and Their Vulnerability"


"Control freaks" or "perfectionists"[4] can be seen as defending themselves against inner vulnerabilities, as with the man who was "a dominating control freak because of his mistaken belief that if he wasn't in control, he would re-experience his childhood angst".[5] Such a figure will "cajole, wheedle, pressurise, get 'difficult' all the time, to get his own way. He's always behaving like a puppet-master, tying strings on other people … because he can't bear to be changed himself".[6] Similarly, a woman who 'is not grounded either in her own imagery or her own musculature … finds her identity in power over (sometimes called love of) her body, her family, her friends, her garden … Without that control, she is nobody'.[7]When such a control freak pattern is broken, 'the Controller is left with a terrible feeling of powerlessness … But feeling their pain and fear brings them back to themselves.[8]
Control freaks have been linked to codependents, in the sense that "codependency stems from a deep-rooted fear of abandonment, which leads to an excessive need to control and dominate … to control others because they fear they cannot control themselves".[9] Recovery entails recognising that being "a control freak … kept me in codependency, and pushed people away from me. To grow out of controlling, we learn to be, instead of do".[10]
In terms of personality-type theory, "the Control Freak … is very much a Type A … driven [by a] need to be in control".[11

~Wikipedia~

Three Things I Learned WHile My PLane Crashed: Ric Elias/compliments of TED

http://www.ted.com Ric Elias had a front-row seat on Flight 1549, the plane that crash-landed in the Hudson River in New York in January 2009. What went through his mind as the doomed plane went down? At TED, he tells his story publicly for the first time.


Monday, September 12, 2011

Witness to a Cover-Up

by Steve Beckow
Col. Kwiatkowski saw no aircraft debris at the Pentagon
I watched a CBC program called “102 Minutes that Changed the World” Sunday night, chronicling events from the first crash into the WTC on 9/11 until the fall of the second tower. I was stunned, unable to move, unable to think.
That was it for me. The only thing I could do was go to bed. And so I changed the channel, surfing to find a show to help me forget what I’d seen and fall asleep. I landed on the Turner Classic Movie channel.
There a “9/11 first responder” by the name of “Vernon Webb” was about to give his 9/11 selection of a movie. First Responder chooses 9/11 fare.
I couldn’t believe what I heard............


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9/11: Explosive Evidence: The Experts Speak Out

CLICK HERE FOR MORE FACTS.......FOR 9/11 TRUTH

The Whistleblowers’ How-To Guide

Frederic Whitehurst and other famous U.S. whistleblowers are donating a book their lawyer wrote on how to do it right to libraries across the country. By John Solomon

Frederic Whitehurst had no idea what being a whistleblower entailed. He simply became outraged when he witnessed a colleague in the FBI laboratory giving misleading testimony in a criminal case two decades ago. So the supervisory agent decided to speak up, telling the defense experts about the inaccuracies.

It cost him nearly a decade of his career, almost all his life savings, severally emotionally draining internal investigations, the humiliation of a psychiatric exam, and an epic legal fight with the bureau. But the proudly stubborn Vietnam veteran persevered and ultimately prevailed in forcing sweeping ethical and scientific reforms at the vaunted FBI crime lab that began in the 1990s and still reverberate today.....


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Sunday, September 11, 2011

The criminalization of speech since 9/11


Last week, a 24-year-old Virginia man named Jubair Ahmad was arrested and charged with providing "material support" to an officially designated terrorist organization, the Pakistani group Lashkar-e-Taiba (LeT).
But Ahmad is not accused of sending money or weapons to LeT, or scouting out targets for the group. What had Ahmad allegedly done? Uploaded a "propaganda video to YouTube on behalf of LeT" that showed "so-called jihadi martyrs and armored trucks exploding after having been hit by improvised explosive devices," according to the Justice Department. Ahmad allegedly had spoken to the son of an LeT figure about making the video.
The case is an example of prosecutors' aggressive use, in the decade after Sept. 11, of the preexisting law that bars providing "material support" to officially designated terrorist groups. In a landmark case last year, the Supreme Court endorsed the...... 


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Schizoid personality disorder

They said he had weeks to live


My son Joshua was born too soon. But in the years that followed, he struggled to hold on. So did we.

BY DEBBI HARRIS

I suppose I seemed a bit too self-assured, strolling into the Family Surgery Waiting room as though I owned the place. I knew to wear warm clothes and comfortable shoes; it was always so frigid in there, and my boy's surgeries seemed to take longer than most. I'd often venture into the gray-white hallways of the hospital, loitering like a familiar vagabond.......


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Why we can never escape our siblings


New science sheds light on how birth order and brother-sister relationships shape our lives. An expert explains



Click here to read article..........

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Why the Breakfast Most Americans Will Eat Today Is a Corporate Scam!

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Are Wikileaks and Anonymous Hackers All There Is Left We Can Rely on, with Trust in Business and Government at Rock Bottom?

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Paul Craig Roberts: 9/11 After a Decade: Have We Learned Anything?

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This 9/11, Vindicate the American Muslim Community

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Is This the NBA or the NFL? Or............

Most of us have seen this come by as an email joke.  Perhaps we might view this in the serious vein.......and make changes ASAP!!!  Then, we wonder why things are the way they are? REALLY?


36 have been accused of spousal abuse
7 have been arrested for fraud
19 have been accused of writing bad checks
117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2
businesses
3 have done time for assault
71 repeat 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
14 have been arrested on drug-related charges
8 have been arrested for shoplifting
21 currently are defendants in lawsuits, and
84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year


Guess which organization this is? NBA Or NFL ?
Neither!




It's the 535 members of the United States Congress.

"there were no words, but images flooded every cell in her being ...4 and a half decades!"

"there were no words, but images flooded every cell in her being ...4 and a half decades!"