James Kavanaugh~Poet, writer, priest, advocate

There are few poets as poignant as James Kavanaugh.. He was a visionary, and recognized what he ultimately used as a title for his poetry, "There Are Men Too Gentle to Live Among Wolves".   I used one of his poems in a small men's group, and there were tears in many eyes, as well as mine. 

His poetry, as well as that of Robert Bly, were monumental in my ideas of the consummate male. I even watched myself, through some years, share some about him to a potential love.  The ones who had absolutely no connection were "on the road soon". There were a few ,,, a very few ,,, who strongly resonated with Kavanaugh's heart, and brilliance, and in digging deep into the male heart.

He was a Catholic priest who most remember as an advocate for reform in his Church. He became famous in the mid-sixties with his controversial bestseller, "A Modern Priest Looks at His Outdated Church". He lived to be 81, and not many writers can express so much emotion in such a truly poignant way. I discovered him when I was in  school, and his poetry  moved me deeply. As time went on, I saw that he was, indeed, representative of those men who, while strong and charactered men, were gentle ... who were really capable of love.

This next, had me cry at the authenticity and integrity with which he thinks.

Kavanaugh writes this about himself:

“I am one of the searchers. There are, I believe, millions of us. We are not unhappy, but neither are we really content. We continue to explore life, hoping to uncover its ultimate secret. We continue to explore ourselves, hoping to understand. We like to walk along the beach, we are drawn by the ocean, taken by its power, its unceasing motion, its mystery and unspeakable beauty. We like forests and mountains, deserts and hidden rivers, and the lonely cities as well. Our sadness is as much a part of our lives as is our laughter. To share our sadness with one we love is perhaps as great a joy as we can know - unless it be to share our laughter. 

We searchers are ambitious only for life itself, for everything beautiful it can provide. Most of all we love and want to be loved. We want to live in a relationship that will not impede our wandering, nor prevent our search, nor lock us in prison walls; that will take us for what little we have to give. We do not want to prove ourselves to another or compete for love.

For wanderers, dreamers, and lovers, for lonely men and women who dare to ask of life everything good and beautiful. It is for those who are too gentle to live among wolves.” 

― James Kavanaugh, There Are Men Too Gentle to Live Among Wolves

"The Struggle of Being A Deep Thinker" by Anna LeMind

This article really made me smile, because my own Meyers-Briggs would attest to this very strong leaning. The rest of the quadrants balance me out.  If you take either the Myers-Briggs, or the Kiersey Temperament Sorter ( and I recommend doing it early in life, e.g., your teen kids), but even doing it in the early eighties, you will see how each of the "poles" will indicate how many people (in percentages) have those poles.  So, when part of you feels a little different, you will discover that perhaps 8% of the people tested has that same result. Okay, so you are different, and in a really good way!

While simple, it is also paradoxically  complicated. In any case, it is enlightening to take. Being honest with each question is, of course, necessary.  Once you have taken the test/survey, the results rarely change.  Over 40 years, mine have always been the same, with only two changes, e.g., as I was approaching and moving into retirement, I saw some changes. Yet, were they really changes? Or were they really the core of my personality, adjusted by school, marriage, kids, etc.?  Fun to think about!

When my daughter was about 13, we took it at the same time.  It was suppossed to be something to do on a rainy day.  The results had me know my daughter in a very different way, and I was able to respect those differences, and to separate them from normal "teen angst". It was wonderful seeing her in that light ... the light of her real temperament.

The Kiersey and M-B are the most reliable, but there are a few others which were better designed for movie magazines. You might want to avoid those.

This article seems to be written with certain results being illuminated.

Being a deep thinker is a great gift as it allows you to delve into the very essence of things and be more conscious.

Still, in modern society with its materialistic consumer mentality, this constant inquiry and profound awareness that accompany being a deep thinker can be quite challenging.

Here are some struggles that only deep thinkers can relate to:

1. Feeling of detachment

In a world ruled by greed, primitive desires and material interests, where people’s intellectual, moral and spiritual level is constantly going down, it’s no surprise that deep thinkers often feel like they don’t belong here.

Sometimes, you just can’t understand other people and their actions, which makes you wonder why you are such a misfit and feel like you come from another planet.

2. You have no interest in mainstream culture and popular activities

Similarly with the feeling of detachment, you don’t resonate with the interests and aspirations that are common to the majority of people and don’t enjoy things everyone loves. Those popular TV shows everyone talks about or usual activities like going for shopping with your friends and talking about clothes only irritate you.

You often wonder how it’s possible to waste so much of time on the things that don’t really matter. In general, you have little or no interest in the mundane and material side of being.

3. You have a profound frustration with modern society

Whether you follow what’s happening in the world or not, the only thing is clear – you are quite pessimistic about the future of humanity. It’s all because you deeply realize that humankind is constantly moving away from the true values and the things that really matter. All this ignorance and superficiality of modern people often make you think that the human race is doomed.

4. Others confuse you for being arrogant/weird/absentminded

For the most part, deep thinkers are introverts who remain immersed in their thoughts most of the day and don’t open up to other people easily. For this reason, those who don’t know you well may get a wrong impression that you are full of yourself and are acting snobby, avoiding small talks and group activities.Some may think you are a weirdo or an absentminded daydreamer who just sits there and has his/her head in the clouds all day long.

5. The necessity to solve everyday problems can be a real challenge

You may have reflected on the questions that most people have never asked themselves and have read more books than anyone around you, but solving everyday problems can make you feel really helpless. The mundane aspects of being have never really interested you and your practical thinking skills are not that good, so you try to avoid dealing with such issues at any cost.

6. Periods of introspection and causeless sadness. 

If you are a deep thinker, you are probably familiar with the feeling of sadness you may have from time to time for no obvious reason. It can be compared to depression of a sort. In these periods, you are just drawn into yourself, analyzing your life or reflecting on existential and esoteric issues. Nothing can really get you out of this state unless the flow of your thoughts comes to some conclusion.

7. Lack of understanding

When you have that thoughtful expression on your face, even your close ones may assume that something is wrong with you and start worrying about you, asking questions like “Is everything all right?” or “Are you ok?”

The problem is that it’s not always easy to explain the cause of this mood. It may be something as simple as a book with a sad ending or a thought-provoking documentary you recently watched – literally anything can put you in deep thoughts.

8. It can be difficult to get out of your head and return to reality

When you are reading a book or are simply immersed in your thoughts, it’s like if you were traveling to an alternate reality. A real struggle is when you have to come back to the “real” world and return to your job, everyday duties and activities. This return is always accompanied by a feeling of confusion and even frustration. Remember those mornings when you are having a beautiful dream and it is suddenly interrupted by the sound of the alarm clock? This is what it feels like when you realize it’s time to get out of your head and come back to the real life.

Anna LeMind

Anna is the founder and lead editor of the website Learning-mind.com. She is passionate about learning new things and reflecting on thought-provoking ideas. She writes about science, psychology and other related topics. She is particularly interested in topics regarding introversion, consciousness and subconscious, perception, human mind's potential, as well as the nature of reality and the universe.

"Little Kids Are Already Watching You" - Joshua Alvarez

When I saw this article in Psychology Today, I chuckled.  My now adult daughter, mom of three little ones, was her own brand of advocate in her then 4-year-old way.  Her grandmother had been in a wheelchair most of her life, and Jenn was vigilant and knowledgeable about handicapped laws. She knew some of the logos, and symbols. Well, anyway, when we were out in public she was like a hawk and watched any misuse of handicapped zones. (I mean any!).  I rapidly learned that if she saw someone who was vigorously walking into a store after having driven into a handicapped space, her brows furrowed and she pursed her lips. I was a coward at times, and just looked at something else, before she barraged me about the "now, the people who need to park there can't, Mom!"

She was a bright one and asked endless questions all day (one day her grandmother and I once counted about 230 questions from wakeup to bed...6a to 9p), so I knew it was going to be that kind of morning. I had company coming and food shopping and cooking was my goal that day.  On this day, she watched one man drive into a handicapped space, just like the example above. He jauntily and athletically sped into the store. After we were in the store for about ten minutes, she momentarily slipped away. As I looked over my shoulder, I saw her literally stalking that man, two feet off his heels,  as he put a few items in his cart. Her body language was focused: calm, strong.  Before I could call out, she walked up to him, and tugged on his jacket sleeve .  He was absorbed, and gave her a quick, "Hiya, honey", and went back to his shopping. "Dude, that was a mistake", I thought! I looked at her expression, and inside my head, I said, "Ah, it's on". She frowned again, knowing, even at four years old, that he had just completely blown her off.  But, she persisted, and tugged on his sleeve again.

"Mithter, you are walking great now, but I thaw you park in a thpace out thide, that ith for people like my grandma! That ith not right! Not right! You are not handicapped"  As this 3-foot-plus kid looked up into the face of this 6-foot-plus man, delivering her verbal firestorm,  she looked directly into his eyes, unwavering. By now, I was spell- bound. Was it the smell of blood in the water? I wondered if he would cross a kiddy line. I was ready! His expression softened, as his eye caught momma bear in the background, probably thinking I would have a soft motherly smile.  Nope, I had completely elongated my spine, stood up very straight and stared. I had a real sense of non-betrayal of my little warrior in this event.  He said to her: "Okay, honey, I'll remember that." She slightly tipped her head backwards, looking at him from narrowed eyes. She nodded her head as if she would believe him for now.

So I use that personal story to introduce this piece by Joshua Alvarez. Anyway, I LOVED the expression on that little girl in the picture!

Little Kids Are Already Judging You

It doesn't take us long to start evaluating others' (mis)deeds.

By Joshua Alvarez, published on January 3, 2017 - last reviewed on March 7, 2017

Yuliya Yesina/ShutterstockYoung children are surprisingly skilled at evaluating other people. Here's what they are picking up. Right and Wrong Behavior

Children as young as 3 can watch adults perform an arbitrary manual task and infer that it is being done the correct way, even without being told, according to a report in Psychological Science. A degree of moral judgment seems to appear early as well. "While it's debatable whether children understand what is right and wrong, they know that there is a right and wrong, and they're looking out for social cues," says coauthor Lucas Butler, a psychologist at the University of Maryland. Another paper, in Cognition, showed that, when given a choice, infants and children were more likely to take a single gift from a friendly character than two from an unfriendly character.  "A 3-year-old who watches someone transgress against someone else is actually quite likely to intervene or protest," says University of Virginia psychologist Amrisha Vaish.

Authenticity

In addition to precociously absorbing rules, very young children also quickly become able to recognize disingenuousness. Studies published in Evolution and Human Behavior show that young children are capable of distinguishing genuine smiles from fake ones in photographs—and that they expect kinder behavior from more genuine-looking people.

Intentions and Desires

Four-year-olds judge a person's behavior not only by its outcome but also by what was intended, a recent study found. Yet children seem put off by inner moral conflict, at least early in their lives. Yale University psychologists Paul Bloom and Christina Starmans found that, unlike adults, 3- to 8-year-olds expected better behavior from characters who acted morally without inner conflict than from those who had overcome immoral desires to do the right thing. Young children even favored someone who had committed an immoral act with a clear conscience over one who had struggled with it.

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How to Write A Forever Letter - by Jennifer Haupt

How to reflect on and impart our beliefs to those we love.

Posted Sep 15, 2017

In this age of emoji communication why bother handwriting a full-blown letter? According to Zaiman: “When we write letters to the people we love, we give them a tangible gift that they can embrace for life: a gift they can touch and hold; a gift that reminds them of our love for them and our appreciation of them; a gift that becomes a permanent brick in the structure of our relationship and strengthens our bond.”

Zaiman is a wonderful storyteller, which is evident in this book peppered with personal stories about meaningful letters she has received, stories from people in her workshops, and stories about letter-writing from literature and philosophy. This highly engaging book provides tips for writing not just a letter, but a parable that conveys the essence of what has given your life meaning.

Here’s more from Zaiman about how to write a Forever Letter:

Source: Used with permission: Llewellyn Publications

Psychology Today: To whom do I write?

Zaiman: To your child or grandchild. Your parent or grandparent. Your teacher, student, brother, sister, spouse, partner, or friend. You can write a Forever Letter to anyone in your life who matters to you.

PT: How many Forever Letters should I write?

Zaiman: Start with one. As Lao Tzu said, “A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.” See how it goes. Each letter you write will be different, because each relationship is different. Some Forever Letters will be more difficult to write, others easier. Either way, know this: You will learn a lot about yourself and about your relationship with the person you’re writing to through the writing process.

PT: What if I'm blocked? 

Zaiman: Perhaps you’re thinking, “I’m not a writer.” The good news: You don’t have to be a writer to write a Forever Letter. You have only to be yourself. It’s your voice, your words, your phrasing, your humor, your kindness, your essence, your way of being in the world that the person you’re writing to wants to hear.

Or, maybe you’re thinking, “I’m not good enough” (self-disclosure—I know this one). If self-doubt creeps in, if you think to yourself things like: I’ve not always lived up to my expectations of myself, I’ve not always lived the values I consider important, I’ve not always shown up in the world or in my relationships in the way I hope, so who am I to write a Forever Letter, don’t let these thoughts keep you from writing.

Here’s what I say: Okay, so you’re not perfect. Guess what? You’re in great company. None of us is perfect. We all have pieces within us we want to improve or even remove. So, when we write, we write from a place of humility, honesty, and truth. We say things like, “As I write, I realize I have fallen short of who I really want to be. Hopefully, you will do better than I am doing.”  Or, “I realize now that for much of my early life, I was living life as the person my parents wanted me to be, not as the person I wanted to be, and therefore I was not able to be as present to you as I would have liked, because I wasn’t even sure how to be present to myself.”

PT: Where do I begin?

Zaiman: First, start with the intention to communicate. Second, set aside some time. I suggest two hours as a start. Third, and this may sound overly simplistic, but it works: Write or type the word “Dear” on the page. Then add the name of the person you’re writing to. Fourth, begin to write. Don’t edit. That will come later. Fifth, write from your most authentic place. Write to share your values, wisdom, appreciation, and love, to ask for forgiveness and to forgive, to disclose the struggle in your soul or to reach out to someone whose soul is in pain. Write to express your belief in or your admiration for, to acknowledge and to uplift.

Writing a Forever Letter takes time, fortitude, and emotional presence. But it’s worth it. If you put time and commitment into writing this letter, you can come to better know yourself and connect more deeply with the person(s) you’re writing to.

Jennifer Haupt is a writer based in Seattle, Washington. She has written for O, The Oprah Magazine, Readers Digest, and The Christian Science Monitor.

In Print: 

I'll Stand By You: One Woman's Mission to Heal the Children of the World

R.I.P. Gary...., M.D.

Gary,
I write to you last of all. Of all these entries, I am certain you will "know" my message and my heart. I won't write much, because you are no longer here. A little over 50 years ago, and my memories are still strikingly vivid as then. After we met, I realized you had the deepest character in a man I had been exposed to. Your parenting of "Bug" was so poignant it was etched on my heart forever. My grief when both of you were called home was unfathomable. My"whys" broke my heart.
You had just graduated from med school, and your goals for that work were so amazing to me. It some some years to realize I was simply going to carry that in my breast as long as I was on this earth. As time goes along, I will add to this, but right now, you were a major loss in my life.......
For many years, I wanted to meet someone like you, but in all those years no one has ever possessed the ideals you worked so hard to develop, and then to pass on to Bug......Not ended.....

“I was in love with him. I knew that much was true. Love was the swelling, hopeful feeling in my chest every time I saw him. Love was the way I could forget about everything when I was with him. Love was the catch in my breath when he looked at me in his intense way. Love was the gasp he could draw out of me with the simplest of touches. Love was the way I could... I could be myself around him, know that I didn't need to be perfect or worry about what he was thinking, because he accepted me.” 
― Jennifer L. Armentrout, The Problem with Forever

Jeff Brown - Bio

Born in Toronto, Canada, Jeff Brown did all the things he was supposed to do to become successful in the eyes of the world. He was on the Dean’s Honor List as an undergraduate. He won the Law and Medicine prize in law school. He apprenticed with top criminal lawyer Eddie Greenspan. It had been Brown’s lifelong dream to practice criminal law and search for the truth in the courtroom.

But then, on the verge of opening a law practice, he heard a little voice inside telling him to stop, just stop. With great difficulty, he honored this voice and began a heartfelt quest for the truth that lived within him. Although he didn’t realize it at the time, Brown was actually questing for his innate image, the essential being that he came into this lifetime to embody. He was searching for his authentic face.

As part of his journey, Brown surrendered to his confusion and explored many possible paths. He studied Bioenergetics and did session work with co-founder Alexander Lowen. He practiced as a body-centered psychotherapist. He completed an MA in Psychology at Saybrook Graduate School in San Francisco and co-founded the Open Heart Gang, a benevolent gang with a heartfelt intention. He started his own business and became a successful entrepreneur.

The most important thing Brown did, however, was the inner work. By going inside and connecting his spirituality with his emotional life, he learned essential lessons. By learning to surrender to the “School of Heart Knocks” (the school of life), he found his authentic face and embraced the call to write Soulshaping. Although he resisted it at first, he soon realized that honoring the call was his best defense against sleeplessness. If he wrote, he slept. If he didn’t, he lay awake all night. This is in the nature of a calling.

Brown self-published the first edition of Soulshaping in December 2007. Called ‘Soulshaping: Adventures in Self-Creation’, the book was sold on a street level by a homeless man in Toronto and met with a tremendous response. It was picked up by North Atlantic Books soon thereafter and a beautiful new edition, distributed by Random House, entered bookstores in August 2009. Now named ‘Soulshaping: A Journey of Self-Creation’, this edition includes a new preface written by Brown that speaks to the grass roots energy that moved the book into the world so quickly, validating his own intuition about the book’s connective and heartfelt nature.

After writing a series of inspirations for ABC’S ‘Good Morning America’ in early, 2010, and appearing on Fox News.com and dozens of radio shows, Brown wrote the viral blog ‘Apologies to the Divine Feminine (from a warrior in transition)’ that autumn, catapulting him to a greater degree of notoriety, particularly in social media. Soon thereafter, he released his first film- Karmageddon- an award winning spiritual documentary that highlights his journey with spiritual teacher Bhagavan Das. Also featuring profound interviews with ‘Be Here Now’ author Ram Dass, yogis Seane Corn and David Life, and chanters Wah, Deva Premal and Miten, Karmageddon is a courageous, self-honest, unforgettable film about spirituality, integrity, and emotional healing. Winner of the Audience Choice Award at the Costa Rica International Film Festival, it can be purchased at www.karmageddonthemovie.com.

Jeff’s second book- Ascending with Both Feet on the Ground- was published in October, 2012. Strongly endorsed by Oprah ‘Soul Series’ Radio host Elizabeth Lesser and best-selling author’s Oriah Mountain Dreamer and Katherine Woodward Thomas, “Ascending” is a collection of some of Jeff’s most popular spiritual graffiti–quotes, soul-bytes and aphorisms frequently shared in social media. His third book- Love It Forward- was published on Valentine’s Day, 2014. In this second book of spiritual graffiti, Love It Forward includes a number of Jeff’s most popular and profound love and relationship quotes. Endorsed by best-selling authors Carolyn Myss, Andrew Harvey and CNN’S Father Edward Beck, this beautiful book also includes a series of inspirations that Jeff wrote for ‘Good Morning America’ and is a reflection of his new movement, also called ‘Love It Forward’.

In May, 2014, Jeff opened his own publishing house- Enrealment Press- and signed a deal with New Leaf distribution. He began publishing other authors in 2015. Enrealment can be found at www.enrealment.com. Additionally, he opened Soulshaping Institute- ‘an institution of truer learning’- in January, 2015 (www.soulshapinginstitute.com).

In May 2015, his higher consciousness love story- An Uncommon Bond- was published to rave reviews. The next month, he signed an audio book deal with Blackstone audio for Bond. The audio book is now available in download and hard copy. His fifth book- aptly called ‘Spiritual Graffiti’- was published in November, 2015. Endorsed by best-selling authors Katie Silcox, Chris Grosso and Lissa Rankin, Graffiti is his third in the series of quotes books.

Jeff is presently in his writing cave in Toronto, working on a book that reflects his views on spirituality.

Once again...thank you to Jeff and his wisdom!

The School of “Heart” Knocks

Author: Jeff Brown

Attorney, psychotherapist

Article:

I went for a walk today through places I used to know while growing up as a child, places that held heart-wrenching memories of the tsunami of tyranny and trauma that was my childhood. I had last visited these places in my 30’s, after walking away from a burgeoning career as a prominent criminal trial lawyer to find something that I called ‘true-path’. Back then, walking away from law was a most difficult thing to do. I was so eager to be a lawyer and make my family proud. I so wanted to join the world after years on the outside. I longed to eat lunch at the Law Society and get as far away as possible from where I came from – all those nagging memories of poverty and pain. The ego has such a wonderful way of erasing the past (if only for a moment…).
  But a little voice deep inside me kept pulling me away from trial law, pulling me in another, initially hazier direction. This little voice carried a karmic blueprint for my destiny and whispered sweet somethings in my ear whenever I dared to walk a “false-path”. I heard it when I was planning my law practice, involved in an unhealthy relationship, sitting in traffic on the way to work: “No, not that way Jeffrey…walk this way.” Although it came through in hints and whispers, it had an odd sense of authority to it. A distant flute with the energy of a symphony.
  After stepping back from law, I immediately began fixating on my future. Like many conditioned male warriors, I was determined to narrow the mystery of “true-path” down to career identity. If I could just explore every career that interested me, if I could just DO it all, I would clarify my identity in no time.
  I soon learned. After only a few days of exploration, my unresolved emotional material burst through the defenses that had held me safe since childhood. I began to cry, and then rage, as one wave of emotion after another pushed on through, eager to be released from its primal bondage. My inner landscape was obstructed with congealed holdings, carryover remnants from an embattled, unresolved childhood. The Mystery began with my history. How to walk the path ahead, when our feet are still stumbling along old pathways? (Ah, the power of then).
  After a nervous breakthrough of startling proportions, my focused warrior lay down his (bloody) arms, and surrendered to the reality that I had to go back down the path and re-claim my broken heart before I could begin to consider the question of career identity. Soon thereafter, I began to revisit my childhood, beginning at the hospital where I was born. I visited old schools, bakeries, racetracks, people I knew. I walked old neighbourhoods for hours at a time. I sat on old park benches. I bought and read old comic books. I went to the university library and looked through newspaper microfiche. I listened to old music. I stared at family pictures for hours.
Wherever I was, I went for the feeling. It wasn’t enough to know that I had been somewhere, I had to feel it in my bones. When I resisted, I meditated. I closed my eyes and envisioned the person or place. I kept at it until the veil came off and the emotional memory emerged. Then I would turn the page.
  One of the primary issues that came clear during this phase was my fear of homelessness. I would sit across from apartment buildings that we had lived in and feel into the memories. Throughout my early life, my sense of security was undermined by evictions and by my mother’s repeated assertion that I wasn’t welcome in my own home. My muladhara- or root chakra- had never felt grounded and safe on Mother Earth.
  With this in mind, I devoted many years to building an economic and domestic foundation for my life. That phase included the buying of a house in downtown Toronto, the growth of my student business into a solid enterprise, and a determined effort to fortify the boundary between myself and the chaos-mongers I had grown up with. Within this stable cocoon, I was able to ascend to the next stage in my evolution, exploring myself as a psychotherapist, completing an MA in Psychology, and beginning a career as an author. But, of course, the journey doesn’t end there. Just when you think the monster has died, he shows up on your doorstep begging to see you.
  Last month, I made the decision to sell the house that I have lived in for fifteen solid years. With the publicity phase for my book at an end, I am ready to start writing a new book and I prefer to do that in the country. So I sold my house at a price that made living in the country affordable. All Go(o)d, until I purchased a new home that won’t be ready until three months after my current house closes.
  Right after signing the waivers on the new property, I drove back to Toronto. While driving, I was overwhelmed by archaic anxieties, the emotional memories associated with a childhood with no fixed address. I pulled over to the side of the road to calm myself, but it was to no avail. The waves of anxiety deepened, as I was swept under by immobilizing fear. I flashed to memories of my Grandparents helping us pack, time and time again. My witness observer jumped to the fore “Just watch, just watch”, but he was swept under too, his meditation cushion bobbing in the shadowy depths.
  I was right back in the heart of the primal terror, imagining myself in bus shelters, sleeping in my vehicle, riding a Greyhound across North America until the house was ready. Never mind the fact that I have the money to sublet an apartment, never mind that I have a whole soulpod of supporters to stay with, never mind the rational mind. I was awash in an ocean of hopelessness.
  Sleepless in Toronto, I have surrendered to the wave for two weeks, alternating between packing up the house and unpacking my emotional baggage.
  When I had begun to clear my emotional debris all those years ago, I swore that I would heal everything. My warrior did not understand the embodied nature of trauma, the ways that emotional material becomes cells in the bones of our being. Let alone did he understand the beauty of the shadow, the ways that repressed emotions can become actualized, spiritual lessons, the grist for our soul’s expansion. For him, for me, it was just a question of fighting our way through everything.
  He was so wrong. Not to say that we cannot heal many of our wounds, but we cannot heal them all, not in one lifetime. As part of the journey, we may have to accept that certain wounds may never fade altogether. Perhaps healing is not always about killing the monster when he comes. Perhaps it is also about learning how to move forward despite him.
  Today I briefly caught a glimpse of the gift of this moment. With my creative work moving so strongly into the world, I have been taking my press clippings to heart. I have been imagining myself beyond the fray, beyond the challenges and lessons of humanness. Something about this wave of emotional memory is pulling me back to (h)earth, and connecting me to the heart of the matter- my emotional life. This is where I lived for so long, at my familiar desk at The School of Heart Knocks. Sit down, Jeffrey, there is lots of home-work still to be done.

A former criminal lawyer and psychotherapist, Jeff Brown is the author of “Soulshaping: A Journey of Self-Creation,” endorsed by authors Elizabeth Lesser and  Ram Dass. It is Brown’s autobiography; an inner travelogue of his journey from archetypal male warrior to a more surrendered path.

To: RCT! James Blunt - Goodbye My Lover [OFFICIAL VIDEO]

This song, is the memory of one of the nicest men (R.C.T.) I have known. We were like two ships back then, so close, but we grazed in the night. I know you will see this, R. You sent me a copy, after. I still appreciate everything about you. Memories.......so rich and treasured. And you....so caring.......

Taking Responsibility for Our Lives by W. Mitchell

Taking Responsibility for Our Lives

It's not what happens to you that matters, it's what you do with it.
W. Mitchell, Inspirational Speaker

Welcome to the Insight Course. After learning in the last lesson how the media at times manipulates public perception in disempowering ways, it is easy to blame those in the media for many of the problems in our world. Yet in order to be the change we want to see in the world, taking responsibility for our own lives is an essential quality.

As a first step to exploring this key topic, the below two-page article discusses the roles of victim and creator, and how when the going gets tough, we have choice as to which role we play.

https://www.momentoflove.org/g/victim_or_creator_vs

Next, W Mitchell is a man who speaks from rich experience. The below inspiring 15-minute video reminds us that it's not what happens to us that matters, but rather what we do about it. In spite of tremendous adversity in his life, W Mitchell chooses again and again not to be a victim, but rather to be a powerful creative force in life, and an inspiration to all who know him.

https://www.personalgrowthcourses.net/video/what_matters_w_mitchell_pgc

It's not what happens to you that matters, it's what you do with it! After watching this inspiring video clip, think of all the ways you may have blamed yourself or others for shortcomings in yourself or your life.

Does it really serve you to blame anyone or anything? What if we choose to accept our circumstances, to accept our lives, and to accept our world just as they are? Aren't we then freer to move powerfully forward and transform into a more effective, inspiring presence for ourselves and for those around us?

For a thought-provoking three-page essay by a renowned relationship counselor giving more valuable ideas on this potent topic, please see the link below.

https://www.personalgrowthcourses.net/stories/hendricks.chemistryofblame1

So would you rather be right or be happy? The two short, inspiring stories of father and son healing below beautifully demonstrate how one person alone letting go of the need to be right and then taking personal responsibility can dramatically change a significant relationship for the better.

https://www.inspiringcommunity.org/inspiring... - Scott's story (two pages)

https://www.personalgrowthcourses.net/stories... - Fred's story (two pages)

Sacred Cows

Sacred Cows © Spyder Webb

Healing and mastery come as we embrace all that is exactly as it is, while taking complete responsibility for our relationship with it.   ~  Dane Colby

"The Other Side"....I'll see you then......

Poignant words .... and perfect ones. The pain of loss is deep, throughout the years ... throughout the decades.

                                                 "The Other Side"

Meet me on the other side, meet me on the other side
I'll see you on the other side, see you on the other side

Honey now if I'm honest, I still don't know what love is
Another mirage folds into the haze of time recalled
And now the floodgates cannot hold
All my sorrow all my rage
A tear that falls on every page

Meet me on the other side, meet me on the other side
Maybe I oughta mention, was never my intention
To harm you or your kin, are you so scared to look within
The ghosts are crawling on our skin
We may race and we may run
We'll not undo what has been done
Or change the moment when it's gone
Meet me on the other side, meet me on the other side
I'll see you on the other side, see you on the other side
I know it would be outrageous
To come on all courageous
And offer you my hand
To pull you up on to dry land
When all I got is sinking sand
That trick ain't worth the time it buys
I'm sick of hearing my own lies
And love's a raven when it flies

Meet me on the other side, meet me on the other side
I'll see you on the other side, see you on the other side
Honey now if I'm honest, I still don't know what love is