Bruce Springsteen-Greatest Performer of All-time

For those Sprinsteen-lovers, this is interesting!

Here’s Why Bruce Springsteen Is The Greatest Performer Of All-time

Bruce Springsteen @ Perth Arena. Show pics by Jackie Jethon

Jan 23rd 2017 | 2:34pm | Daniel Cribb

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“We are the new American resistance!” US rock icon Bruce Springsteen yelled to a packed Perth Arena, advocating for tolerance, inclusion, racial justice, LGBTQ rights, gender equality, and so much more.

In stark contrast to the bold figure commanding the unwavering attention of thousands of people, a more casual, softly spoken Springsteen addresses the media during soundcheck. “Our hearts and our spirits are with all the millions of people who marched yesterday, and The E Street Band, we are part of the new resistance…art’s job is to witness and testify.”

The band’s execution of more than 30 songs over three-and-a-half hours was flawless and they made it look so easy. But it was during soundcheck that we see even after forty years, they’re still honing their craft, having been in rehearsals in Perth since Wednesday.  

"Oh yeah, I got it, I got it,” Springsteen says to guitarist Steven Van Zandt after some brief notes on the Land Of Hope And Dreams outro.

Four hours later and the epic chorus soars across a sea of people, and although the crowd is a lot bigger, The Boss remains just as affable and down to earth as he was earlier.

There’s a wealth of homemade signs littering the crowd – some requesting songs, others a dance, and one reads “Springsteen 4 President”. As hit after hit crash into one another, there’s little time for in-between song banter, but the energy coming from the stage says it all, with The E Street Band truly in sync and loving every second of it.

The set takes numerous unpredictable turns after opening with an orchestra-fuelled version of New York City Serenade, courtesy of some local musicians, and every member has their moment in the spotlight; even drummer Max Weinberg is perched on a podium.

Saxophonist and nephew of original E Street Band member Clarence Clemons, Jake Clemons stole the show on numerous occasions, unleashing gut-wrenching solos while pianist Roy Bittan was a driving force.

Despite being one of the more endeared members of The E Street Band, Van Zandt often faded into the background, only reminding punters of his presence with the occasional harmony or by leaning over The Boss’ shoulder.

Tom Morello was a key element of The E Street Band during their last Aussie tour and while his absence could be noted, longtime guitarist Nils Lofgren was on fire, with Springsteen also taking on more guitar solos throughout the set, bending his strings to oblivion on numerous occasions.

With his trademark Telecaster flung over his shoulder, Springsteen strutted back and forth to Out In The Street, shortly after securing his status of the coolest musician alive when sculling a beer presented by an audience member.

Every song was played like it was not only the last tune for that show but the final song he would ever play, with Springsteen screaming the final chorus of Darkness On The Edge Of Town with show-stopping conviction.

He ventured back into the crowd once again and took position on a platform in the middle of the room. A toddler perched upon someone’s shoulders nearby looked on in awe during Darlington Country, a sure sign that the iconic songs will be endeared for generations to come.

Three hours into the set and there was no sign of an end, as the band dished up The Promised Land, American Skin (41 Shots) and The Rising before leaving Springsteen on the stage with just an acoustic guitar. "Let's see if I remember this,” he said, spotting a sign requesting Blood Brothers. A minute to figure out the chords and he was off.

The intimacy was short-lived, though, as in a blaze of glory the house lights turned on and the intro of Born To Run saw a sea of people rise from their seats. Three audience members were plucked from the crowd during Dancing In The Dark before a touching rendition of Tenth Avenue Freeze Out was accompanied by imagery of the late Clarence Clemons.

"I don't think I have anything left," Springsteen said, as a glittering cape was thrown over him and he hobbled off the stage. The charade came crumbling down quickly as he burst back onto the stage to finish Johnny O'Keefe’s Shout and rounded out a set of quality and quantity with Bobby Jean, cementing his status as the greatest performer of all time.

My kid, and USA for Africa – "We Are the World" Michael Jackson 1985 HD Version

To My Daughter .. this is celebration of only one of many events when you were young...I LOVE YOU!  I STILL know all the words!  Bet you do, too!

Last night as I was falling asleep, I heard this song on the radio. It catapulted me into my past, and that of my precious daughter. As I wrote on the 15th, I knew I had the beginnings of a child who showed compassion, passion to make the world better, and urgings to see people as "one".

This was especially poignant when she was almost 7. When she heard this song, she wanted me to write down the words for her. ("for next year, Mom, when I can read better").  Ha! She had them memorized in a day! And we sang it together for a couple of hours until she felt she knew them. She continued to talk about the song and its essence.  She was getting it, I thought.  Some of her remarks during that process moved me deeply. The values in the song had me loving it, too.  To this day, my eyes haze over whenever I hear it.

So she came to me about a week after her "ordination" into junior "fund raising". "Mom", here is what I want to do, but you will have to help me on a big part of it." I listened hard, because she was indeed goal-focused when she wanted to be. (Math homework? Well, maybe not so much at times!)

"So, mom ... the children in Ethiopia are  starving to death.  I want to help them. I want to go to lots of homes, ... like, um, Trick 'n Treat on Halloween.  I want you to carry my boombox, playing this song the whole time. And I will knock on doors and ask if they could give a little money to help them. But what shall I do to let them know I am not really keeping the money for myself?" ("Hmmmm, alert to scams, the parental side of me thought!)

So we took a day making up a flyer. We made sure that a bank was mentioned, as the place the money would rest until we could send it. (37 top artists collaborated ... a great piece!) It said that 20,000,000 copies of the song were sold, obviously winning the Grammy! It said that $63,000,000 was raised by this global venture, for the famine in Ethiopa. Thus, Live Aid was born, amassing numerous stars and performers. It was staged at Wembley in England and broadcast all over the world. Top flight!

I think every kid I knew was really "into" it. (She definitely thought that was cool, but the fact that Michael Jackson was a significant part of it, could not have made it even more worthy of her attention!) Nothing ... I mean NOTHING ... could get her to a TV faster than she when it would come on ... and if it was in the middle of dinner...well her dad and I just giggled and shook our heads about the smoke she left in her trail! Inside, I was joyful, as I saw these values being breathed in by her. (Kleenex!)

I was delighted with her "staging competency", and we set about for the big evening! We took the sheets to a copy machine, then went out for a milkshake after to celebrate her special event! She was so-o-o-o revved up! And really? So was I! Entering a kid's world sometimes is enormously joyful!  Of all the stars, I'd be hard pressed to say which were my faves, but the energy coming forth (like Cyndi Lauper).Gotta say Stevie Wonder and Bruce "The Boss"
Springsteen knocked it clear out of the park with their segment! And it was poignant to see the whole Jackson family there.  I could listen to it over and over! All of them ...transcendent!

Oops, one more detail she wanted ... a tiny copy of the United States flag, and that of Africa. She cut them out, and we pinned them to her teeshirt.  What a beautiful sight!  Huge brown-doe eyes, floor-sweeping lashes, and missing teeth! Well, I can't describe how proud I was of her.  I put Kleenex in my pocket, because I knew I would really need it that night.

As we were walking out of the house, she told me her "game plan".  From our street,  you could look down on about 40-50 homes. It immediately became clear that she wanted to go to every single one  of them. And this was the kid that sometimes rolled her eyes at a request to clear the table!  I went back inside to change into sneakers!

The first home, at the top of her young crucible, was a neighbor two doors down.  I stood outside, the boombox emanating the song.  Her back and shoulders were so straight as she walked up the driveway, and you could just feel her zeal for this. She tripped on the man's step, but recuperated in a flash, avoiding a total face-plant, and was knocking on his door.  (Mom's thought here:  the strength and confidence of that diminutive fist knocking. How did we get to "here" so fast?  Kleenex time! And we had barely started!)

When the neighbor answered, he looked irritated, perhaps interrupted.  She stood quietly for a moment looking at him directly (awesome intuitive response, I thought!), and then started her little speech. Her little voice never wavered as she asked him for a little money to give to these children in Ethiopia. Almost before she finished, he cut her off   with a grumpy, "NO!" For some odd reason, they continued to look at one another.  Then, I heard my daughter say, "You don't have to give quarters, but if you have some pennies, they would be okay....." (Mother or not, this pitch would have surely gotten me!). So he dug around in his pants pockets, and finally came up with four pennies. When he handed those to her, she looked at the coins for a few seconds in her palm. Was she counting them? What next, I thought. She stuck out her hand to shake his, and said in the utmost innocent, gracious   voice, "Thank you, sir. The children in Africa will eat better now." (Kleenex coming out again!)

When she got back to me, the man's door was closed, and I complimented her on the impressive way she had handled that whole thing. "Mom". she said. "he knows 4 pennies can't get much food. He'll think about that." And she skipped merrily on her way to the next home.  For her, it was a highly successful "cold call" ... regardless.

At the end of the evening, she had amassed $32 and some cents.  Her father had said we would match whatever she collected.  You might have thought she had made a million dollars! In her world, she did. And when we went to the bank to prepare the check, her eyes shone brighter than any dime!

Listen to it! Put this on full-screen! It gives you goosebumps! A great piece!
Yup, Kleenex again!

(FYI - I wondered why everybody was using songsheets.  Apparently there were numerous factors which made the taping session impossible for all of the artists to appear together. So, this date was the only one open. Thus, this final recording was done on one night.  No one had even seen the words yet. After what is said to be a 9-hour session, this was their "final word"!  All that makes this even more electrifying!)

"Sex in the Senior Years" By Louanne Cole Weston, PhD

As I sit here ready to post this link from Louanne Weston, I am shaking my head. No pun intended towards Dr. Weston's article.  I will explain myself ... oh, Lord, I can see the emails coming!

Sex is a hot topic, and no less so when you are a senior.  I frustrate myself with the online articles which seemed to put sex into the category of having to use a cane when you f**k. I think it is the mindset you have.  To explain....

Well, I was 14.  My father was a physician and had his offices built onto the other end of our house. It was good for us kids, because if a patient was a "no-show", Dad would pop out and have some tea, and check on all of us. Plus, he did not have to include travel time into his schedule. We would earn extra money by helping him copy and mail out the statements (no computers then!), lick all the envelopes, clean his office rooms, and assorted other chores.  One perk for me was that even in off times, we'd run into some of his patients...and chat for a couple of minutes. That was always nice.

At the end of the year, as we had graduated into some of the more complicated billing, we had the year-end wrap-up. (And wouldn't ya know that came during Christmas break!)  The schedule was always the same. Dad would due all the tallies for the year contingent on his accountant.  And we were called to gather round.  Dad had no qualms whatsoever of explaining briefly his bottom lines.  He would show us his gross earnings. Then, he showed us the list of his expenses.  I always remember that his liability insurance was always staggering. He wanted us to be more frugal around the house. Stuff like that sticks.

I recall once when he and many others were asked to volunteer to give polio shots at the local high school.  All the docs were generous with their time, and that went off without a hitch.  There were about 50 docs who volunteered. Very sadly, one woman out of a couple thousand contracted polio. As a result, the liability insurances of all the doctors were clobbered, but all were accepting because her life was thrown into great difficulty.  An ancillary message for me that season, was observing some of the docs wail like babies because of that. My Dad was always into the question, "What did you learn from that?"  or "What did you observe?'

I remember, cleaning his office  that day, and others,  while he was out on house calls (remember those days of house calls?).  I'd always look at the books which were so far over my head, I had no interest whatsoever.  But then I noted a new one.  It was a volume on sex (apart from missionary stuff!).  Since soldiers were then coming home with all sorts of debilitating injuries, this was a major treatment issue for many of them.

Well, this 14-year-old was as wide-eyed as she could be.  So, I read and read and read. And came back other times to continue reading. The best part was how the book normalized the desire, complexion and completion of sex.

There were so many ways to achieve sexual satisfaction, it was dizzying!  In addition, at that age, I was merely playing with future ideas.  But my eyes were opened for life! My then-young memory was struck with the way the book presented the information (complete with zillions of pictures!) in a very natural, accepting way.  The message was "if two people are consensual, then it is okay". When I started on my sexual path later, and went into marriage, that was a good and remembered message.  I have always seen sex as another language ... one never to be completely mastered, but one to always be studied, loved, and "spoken". Today, I feel the same. There are so many seniors that barely even dare to whisper about it. That's the women, and the men are compliant and they have their own conversations more privately.  I lapse into my junior-high lingo, thinking that is just plain stupid!

This is one of the recent pieces I found that was positive.  I posted it because I thought it was ludicrous to have a lot of negativity, in general,  be the case. So, I know I will be looking into the topic more, e.g., bringing it up more in conversations.  When you study to be a therapist, you are given some good ways to have fun with it! Teensy- weensy mind-benders ... you know.  Right?

Also, get some different music...SO not kidding here.  Some rap or rock, or African drumming can be incredibly rousing!  Metal! Don't forget the rhythm of blues! While you might never play it in other circumstances, go for it ... bet you will fall into the cadences!!! Perhaps the only word from article below, and which is necessary for mountain top delight .... L-U-B-R-I-C-A-T-I-O-N!

This is a time of life to just have fun and realize just how passionate you really still are!

Nothing has really changed in a way, except the fierce successive contortions you could have at 25 are clearly just a bit slower now! Advantage: women's team! More is the same, than not.

So, Tally ho!!!!!!

Sex in the Senior Years

During the last two decades, several studies have left little doubt that seniors have sex well into their 60s, 70s, and beyond. But what quantitative studies don't always show is what senior sex is like -- including its pleasures and problems.

Take the case of a couple I counseled recently. Both were in their 70s, and both were worried about their sex life. The problem? The wife wanted to have sex more often than the husband. As a result, she feared that her spouse no longer found her attractive, and he felt bad about his low libido as well as his short-lived erections and inability to satisfy his wife’s desires.

Challenges for Seniors

Such physical and psychological problems in relation to sex are not all that unusual among seniors.

Certain medications, such as those used to treat high blood pressureand depression, can reduce libido. So, too, can declining levels of testosterone in both men and women. Nerve damage caused by diabetes and other conditions can impair a man’s ability to get and sustain an erection. And low levels of estrogen can thin and dry a woman’s vaginal tissues, making intercourse uncomfortable.

On the emotional front, long-simmering relationship difficulties may dampen desire, as can shame about an aging body. And either partner can suffer a dramatic blow to his or her sex life if the other partner is incapacitated by illness or injury.

Senior Sex Treatment

Many problems that affect senior sexuality can be treated. But studies show most seniors don’t talk about sex with their doctors, perhaps because they were raised to believe such talk is taboo.

In the case of the elderly couple I counseled, the man saw a doctor, who gave him testosterone supplements to increase his libido. I also coached the couple on ways to enjoy sex without intercourse, including oral sex and other forms of foreplay, so the man could free himself of some of his performance anxiety.

Sex Tips for Seniors

Last I heard, my septuagenarian patients were sexually happy and healthy -- and enjoying new modes of intimacy.

Ask your doctor if your problem has a medical cause -- and a solution.

Use lubricant to help with vaginal dryness.

Experiment with masturbation to satisfy unfulfilled desire.

Kick things off with foreplay. Older men need more touching to get an erection, and older women need more touching to get lubricated.

Powerful thought from Henri Bergson

Some years ago, I came across this quote from Henri Bergson, a French philosopher, influential especially in the first half of the 20th century and after WWII in continental philosophy. His depth about many topics is compelling, IMHO. 

This following quote has been over my desk for years, and is always an impetus when a certain part of my "internal flame" is wavering. I also discovered that those who also liked it were folks I wanted to know.

"Fortunately, some are born with spiritual immune systems that sooner or later give rejection to the illusory worldview grafted upon them  from birth through social conditioning.  They begin sensing that something is amiss and start looking for answers.  Inner knowledge and anomalous outer experiences show them a side of reality others are oblivious to, and so begin their journey of awakening.  Each step of the journey is made by following the heart instead of following the crowd and by choosing knowledge over the veils of ignorance."

James Kavanaugh~Poet, writer, priest, advocate

There are few poets as poignant as James Kavanaugh.. He was a visionary, and recognized what he ultimately used as a title for his poetry, "There Are Men Too Gentle to Live Among Wolves".   I used one of his poems in a small men's group, and there were tears in many eyes, as well as mine. 

His poetry, as well as that of Robert Bly, were monumental in my ideas of the consummate male. I even watched myself, through some years, share some about him to a potential love.  The ones who had absolutely no connection were "on the road soon". There were a few ,,, a very few ,,, who strongly resonated with Kavanaugh's heart, and brilliance, and in digging deep into the male heart.

He was a Catholic priest who most remember as an advocate for reform in his Church. He became famous in the mid-sixties with his controversial bestseller, "A Modern Priest Looks at His Outdated Church". He lived to be 81, and not many writers can express so much emotion in such a truly poignant way. I discovered him when I was in  school, and his poetry  moved me deeply. As time went on, I saw that he was, indeed, representative of those men who, while strong and charactered men, were gentle ... who were really capable of love.

This next, had me cry at the authenticity and integrity with which he thinks.

Kavanaugh writes this about himself:

“I am one of the searchers. There are, I believe, millions of us. We are not unhappy, but neither are we really content. We continue to explore life, hoping to uncover its ultimate secret. We continue to explore ourselves, hoping to understand. We like to walk along the beach, we are drawn by the ocean, taken by its power, its unceasing motion, its mystery and unspeakable beauty. We like forests and mountains, deserts and hidden rivers, and the lonely cities as well. Our sadness is as much a part of our lives as is our laughter. To share our sadness with one we love is perhaps as great a joy as we can know - unless it be to share our laughter. 

We searchers are ambitious only for life itself, for everything beautiful it can provide. Most of all we love and want to be loved. We want to live in a relationship that will not impede our wandering, nor prevent our search, nor lock us in prison walls; that will take us for what little we have to give. We do not want to prove ourselves to another or compete for love.

For wanderers, dreamers, and lovers, for lonely men and women who dare to ask of life everything good and beautiful. It is for those who are too gentle to live among wolves.” 

― James Kavanaugh, There Are Men Too Gentle to Live Among Wolves

"The Struggle of Being A Deep Thinker" by Anna LeMind

This article really made me smile, because my own Meyers-Briggs would attest to this very strong leaning. The rest of the quadrants balance me out.  If you take either the Myers-Briggs, or the Kiersey Temperament Sorter ( and I recommend doing it early in life, e.g., your teen kids), but even doing it in the early eighties, you will see how each of the "poles" will indicate how many people (in percentages) have those poles.  So, when part of you feels a little different, you will discover that perhaps 8% of the people tested has that same result. Okay, so you are different, and in a really good way!

While simple, it is also paradoxically  complicated. In any case, it is enlightening to take. Being honest with each question is, of course, necessary.  Once you have taken the test/survey, the results rarely change.  Over 40 years, mine have always been the same, with only two changes, e.g., as I was approaching and moving into retirement, I saw some changes. Yet, were they really changes? Or were they really the core of my personality, adjusted by school, marriage, kids, etc.?  Fun to think about!

When my daughter was about 13, we took it at the same time.  It was suppossed to be something to do on a rainy day.  The results had me know my daughter in a very different way, and I was able to respect those differences, and to separate them from normal "teen angst". It was wonderful seeing her in that light ... the light of her real temperament.

The Kiersey and M-B are the most reliable, but there are a few others which were better designed for movie magazines. You might want to avoid those.

This article seems to be written with certain results being illuminated.

Being a deep thinker is a great gift as it allows you to delve into the very essence of things and be more conscious.

Still, in modern society with its materialistic consumer mentality, this constant inquiry and profound awareness that accompany being a deep thinker can be quite challenging.

Here are some struggles that only deep thinkers can relate to:

1. Feeling of detachment

In a world ruled by greed, primitive desires and material interests, where people’s intellectual, moral and spiritual level is constantly going down, it’s no surprise that deep thinkers often feel like they don’t belong here.

Sometimes, you just can’t understand other people and their actions, which makes you wonder why you are such a misfit and feel like you come from another planet.

2. You have no interest in mainstream culture and popular activities

Similarly with the feeling of detachment, you don’t resonate with the interests and aspirations that are common to the majority of people and don’t enjoy things everyone loves. Those popular TV shows everyone talks about or usual activities like going for shopping with your friends and talking about clothes only irritate you.

You often wonder how it’s possible to waste so much of time on the things that don’t really matter. In general, you have little or no interest in the mundane and material side of being.

3. You have a profound frustration with modern society

Whether you follow what’s happening in the world or not, the only thing is clear – you are quite pessimistic about the future of humanity. It’s all because you deeply realize that humankind is constantly moving away from the true values and the things that really matter. All this ignorance and superficiality of modern people often make you think that the human race is doomed.

4. Others confuse you for being arrogant/weird/absentminded

For the most part, deep thinkers are introverts who remain immersed in their thoughts most of the day and don’t open up to other people easily. For this reason, those who don’t know you well may get a wrong impression that you are full of yourself and are acting snobby, avoiding small talks and group activities.Some may think you are a weirdo or an absentminded daydreamer who just sits there and has his/her head in the clouds all day long.

5. The necessity to solve everyday problems can be a real challenge

You may have reflected on the questions that most people have never asked themselves and have read more books than anyone around you, but solving everyday problems can make you feel really helpless. The mundane aspects of being have never really interested you and your practical thinking skills are not that good, so you try to avoid dealing with such issues at any cost.

6. Periods of introspection and causeless sadness. 

If you are a deep thinker, you are probably familiar with the feeling of sadness you may have from time to time for no obvious reason. It can be compared to depression of a sort. In these periods, you are just drawn into yourself, analyzing your life or reflecting on existential and esoteric issues. Nothing can really get you out of this state unless the flow of your thoughts comes to some conclusion.

7. Lack of understanding

When you have that thoughtful expression on your face, even your close ones may assume that something is wrong with you and start worrying about you, asking questions like “Is everything all right?” or “Are you ok?”

The problem is that it’s not always easy to explain the cause of this mood. It may be something as simple as a book with a sad ending or a thought-provoking documentary you recently watched – literally anything can put you in deep thoughts.

8. It can be difficult to get out of your head and return to reality

When you are reading a book or are simply immersed in your thoughts, it’s like if you were traveling to an alternate reality. A real struggle is when you have to come back to the “real” world and return to your job, everyday duties and activities. This return is always accompanied by a feeling of confusion and even frustration. Remember those mornings when you are having a beautiful dream and it is suddenly interrupted by the sound of the alarm clock? This is what it feels like when you realize it’s time to get out of your head and come back to the real life.

Anna LeMind

Anna is the founder and lead editor of the website Learning-mind.com. She is passionate about learning new things and reflecting on thought-provoking ideas. She writes about science, psychology and other related topics. She is particularly interested in topics regarding introversion, consciousness and subconscious, perception, human mind's potential, as well as the nature of reality and the universe.

"Little Kids Are Already Watching You" - Joshua Alvarez

When I saw this article in Psychology Today, I chuckled.  My now adult daughter, mom of three little ones, was her own brand of advocate in her then 4-year-old way.  Her grandmother had been in a wheelchair most of her life, and Jenn was vigilant and knowledgeable about handicapped laws. She knew some of the logos, and symbols. Well, anyway, when we were out in public she was like a hawk and watched any misuse of handicapped zones. (I mean any!).  I rapidly learned that if she saw someone who was vigorously walking into a store after having driven into a handicapped space, her brows furrowed and she pursed her lips. I was a coward at times, and just looked at something else, before she barraged me about the "now, the people who need to park there can't, Mom!"

She was a bright one and asked endless questions all day (one day her grandmother and I once counted about 230 questions from wakeup to bed...6a to 9p), so I knew it was going to be that kind of morning. I had company coming and food shopping and cooking was my goal that day.  On this day, she watched one man drive into a handicapped space, just like the example above. He jauntily and athletically sped into the store. After we were in the store for about ten minutes, she momentarily slipped away. As I looked over my shoulder, I saw her literally stalking that man, two feet off his heels,  as he put a few items in his cart. Her body language was focused: calm, strong.  Before I could call out, she walked up to him, and tugged on his jacket sleeve .  He was absorbed, and gave her a quick, "Hiya, honey", and went back to his shopping. "Dude, that was a mistake", I thought! I looked at her expression, and inside my head, I said, "Ah, it's on". She frowned again, knowing, even at four years old, that he had just completely blown her off.  But, she persisted, and tugged on his sleeve again.

"Mithter, you are walking great now, but I thaw you park in a thpace out thide, that ith for people like my grandma! That ith not right! Not right! You are not handicapped"  As this 3-foot-plus kid looked up into the face of this 6-foot-plus man, delivering her verbal firestorm,  she looked directly into his eyes, unwavering. By now, I was spell- bound. Was it the smell of blood in the water? I wondered if he would cross a kiddy line. I was ready! His expression softened, as his eye caught momma bear in the background, probably thinking I would have a soft motherly smile.  Nope, I had completely elongated my spine, stood up very straight and stared. I had a real sense of non-betrayal of my little warrior in this event.  He said to her: "Okay, honey, I'll remember that." She slightly tipped her head backwards, looking at him from narrowed eyes. She nodded her head as if she would believe him for now.

So I use that personal story to introduce this piece by Joshua Alvarez. Anyway, I LOVED the expression on that little girl in the picture!

Little Kids Are Already Judging You

It doesn't take us long to start evaluating others' (mis)deeds.

By Joshua Alvarez, published on January 3, 2017 - last reviewed on March 7, 2017

Yuliya Yesina/ShutterstockYoung children are surprisingly skilled at evaluating other people. Here's what they are picking up. Right and Wrong Behavior

Children as young as 3 can watch adults perform an arbitrary manual task and infer that it is being done the correct way, even without being told, according to a report in Psychological Science. A degree of moral judgment seems to appear early as well. "While it's debatable whether children understand what is right and wrong, they know that there is a right and wrong, and they're looking out for social cues," says coauthor Lucas Butler, a psychologist at the University of Maryland. Another paper, in Cognition, showed that, when given a choice, infants and children were more likely to take a single gift from a friendly character than two from an unfriendly character.  "A 3-year-old who watches someone transgress against someone else is actually quite likely to intervene or protest," says University of Virginia psychologist Amrisha Vaish.

Authenticity

In addition to precociously absorbing rules, very young children also quickly become able to recognize disingenuousness. Studies published in Evolution and Human Behavior show that young children are capable of distinguishing genuine smiles from fake ones in photographs—and that they expect kinder behavior from more genuine-looking people.

Intentions and Desires

Four-year-olds judge a person's behavior not only by its outcome but also by what was intended, a recent study found. Yet children seem put off by inner moral conflict, at least early in their lives. Yale University psychologists Paul Bloom and Christina Starmans found that, unlike adults, 3- to 8-year-olds expected better behavior from characters who acted morally without inner conflict than from those who had overcome immoral desires to do the right thing. Young children even favored someone who had committed an immoral act with a clear conscience over one who had struggled with it.

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How to Write A Forever Letter - by Jennifer Haupt

How to reflect on and impart our beliefs to those we love.

Posted Sep 15, 2017

In this age of emoji communication why bother handwriting a full-blown letter? According to Zaiman: “When we write letters to the people we love, we give them a tangible gift that they can embrace for life: a gift they can touch and hold; a gift that reminds them of our love for them and our appreciation of them; a gift that becomes a permanent brick in the structure of our relationship and strengthens our bond.”

Zaiman is a wonderful storyteller, which is evident in this book peppered with personal stories about meaningful letters she has received, stories from people in her workshops, and stories about letter-writing from literature and philosophy. This highly engaging book provides tips for writing not just a letter, but a parable that conveys the essence of what has given your life meaning.

Here’s more from Zaiman about how to write a Forever Letter:

Source: Used with permission: Llewellyn Publications

Psychology Today: To whom do I write?

Zaiman: To your child or grandchild. Your parent or grandparent. Your teacher, student, brother, sister, spouse, partner, or friend. You can write a Forever Letter to anyone in your life who matters to you.

PT: How many Forever Letters should I write?

Zaiman: Start with one. As Lao Tzu said, “A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.” See how it goes. Each letter you write will be different, because each relationship is different. Some Forever Letters will be more difficult to write, others easier. Either way, know this: You will learn a lot about yourself and about your relationship with the person you’re writing to through the writing process.

PT: What if I'm blocked? 

Zaiman: Perhaps you’re thinking, “I’m not a writer.” The good news: You don’t have to be a writer to write a Forever Letter. You have only to be yourself. It’s your voice, your words, your phrasing, your humor, your kindness, your essence, your way of being in the world that the person you’re writing to wants to hear.

Or, maybe you’re thinking, “I’m not good enough” (self-disclosure—I know this one). If self-doubt creeps in, if you think to yourself things like: I’ve not always lived up to my expectations of myself, I’ve not always lived the values I consider important, I’ve not always shown up in the world or in my relationships in the way I hope, so who am I to write a Forever Letter, don’t let these thoughts keep you from writing.

Here’s what I say: Okay, so you’re not perfect. Guess what? You’re in great company. None of us is perfect. We all have pieces within us we want to improve or even remove. So, when we write, we write from a place of humility, honesty, and truth. We say things like, “As I write, I realize I have fallen short of who I really want to be. Hopefully, you will do better than I am doing.”  Or, “I realize now that for much of my early life, I was living life as the person my parents wanted me to be, not as the person I wanted to be, and therefore I was not able to be as present to you as I would have liked, because I wasn’t even sure how to be present to myself.”

PT: Where do I begin?

Zaiman: First, start with the intention to communicate. Second, set aside some time. I suggest two hours as a start. Third, and this may sound overly simplistic, but it works: Write or type the word “Dear” on the page. Then add the name of the person you’re writing to. Fourth, begin to write. Don’t edit. That will come later. Fifth, write from your most authentic place. Write to share your values, wisdom, appreciation, and love, to ask for forgiveness and to forgive, to disclose the struggle in your soul or to reach out to someone whose soul is in pain. Write to express your belief in or your admiration for, to acknowledge and to uplift.

Writing a Forever Letter takes time, fortitude, and emotional presence. But it’s worth it. If you put time and commitment into writing this letter, you can come to better know yourself and connect more deeply with the person(s) you’re writing to.

Jennifer Haupt is a writer based in Seattle, Washington. She has written for O, The Oprah Magazine, Readers Digest, and The Christian Science Monitor.

In Print: 

I'll Stand By You: One Woman's Mission to Heal the Children of the World