MY WORK ... MY PASSION

~ Certified Transpersonal Hypnotherapist ; Past experience: Dream Analysis /10 Years Experience ~ Psychotherapist / Gestalt, Jungian, Zen, Reality and Energy Therapies /10 Years Experience ~ EMDR~ Men and Their Journey: the neuroscience of the male brain, and the implications in sexuality, education and relationship ~ Women: Their Transformation and Empowerment ~ ATOD (Alcohol, Tobacco and Other Drugs) / 21 years experience ~ Ordained Interfaith Minister & Official Celebrant ~ Social Justice Advocate ~ Child and Human Rights Advocate ~ Spiritual Guide and Intuitive ~ Certified Reiki Practitioner ~ Mediation / Conflict Resolution • “Intentional Love” Parenting Strategy Groups ~ Parenting Workshops ~ Coaching for parents of Indigo, Crystal, and Rainbow Children ~ International Training: Israel & England ~ Critical Incident Stress Debriefing ~ Post-911 and Post-Katrina volunteer

BSW - UNC Greensboro

MSW - UNC Chapel Hill

"An Unending Love"

This blog and video is devoted and dedicated to my daughter, my grand daughters, and my grand son. They are hearts of my heart. Our connection through many lives..... is utterly infinite.




The Definition of Genius

"THRIVE"


"ONLY LOVE PREVAILS ....."
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The degree of our enlightenment is the degree of passion that we will have for the whole world." ~The Greystone Mandala


~The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.

Winston Churchill


TECHNOLOGY..........

In “Conversations with God”, by Neale Donald Walsch, there is a warning. I think of it as the Atlantis passage, and I've quoted it a few times before. "As I have said, this isn't the first time your civilization has been at this brink," God tells Walsch. "I want to repeat this, because it is vital that you hear this. Once before on your planet, the technology you developed was far greater than your ability to use it responsibly. You are approaching the same point in human history again. It is vitally important that you understand this. Your present technology is threatening to outstrip your ability to use it wisely. Your society is on the verge of becoming a product of your technology rather than your technology being a product of your society. When a society becomes a product of its own technology, it destroys itself."

Thursday, May 18, 2017

How the People We Once Loved Become Strangers Again

How The People We Once Loved Become 

Strangers Again

(Kind Of)

     Brianna Wiest
It’s interesting to think about how we make people who used to be everything into nothing again. How we learn to forget. How we force forgetting. What we put in place of them in the interim. The dynamics afterward always tell you more than what the relationship did – grief is a faster teacher than joy – but what does it mean when you cycle out to being strangers again? You never really stop knowing each other in that way. Maybe there’s no choice but to make them someone different in your mind, not the person who knew your daily anxieties and what you looked like naked and what made you cry and how much you loved them.


When our lives revolve around someone, they don’t just stop doing so even if all that’s left is some semblance of their memory. There are always those bits that linger. The memories that are impressed on the places you went and the things you said and the songs you listened to remain.
We all eventually find ourselves standing in the checkout line, hearing one of those songs come on and realizing that we’re revolving around them again. And maybe we never stopped.
Do you ever really forget your lovers’ birthdays, or all your first times, intimate and not? Do your anniversaries ever become normal days of the year again? Are the things you did and promises you made ever really neutralized? Do they become void now that you’re broken up or do you decidedly ignore them because there’s simply no other choice? The mind tells you to go on, and forces your heart to follow suit I guess.
want to believe that you either love someone, in some way, forever, or you never really loved them at all. That once two reactive chemicals cross both are changed. That the wounds we leave in people are sometimes too raw to risk falling back into them. I don’t want to believe that we write each other off because we simply don’t matter anymore. I know love isn’t expendable. I wonder, and maybe hope, if we ever just force it to be out of necessity.
Maybe it’s just that we’re all at the centers of our own little universes, and sometimes they overlap with other people’s, and that small bit of intersection leaves some part of it changed. The collision can wreck us, change us, shift us. Sometimes we merge into one, and other times we rescind because the comfort of losing what we thought we knew wins out. 
Either way, it’s inevitable that you expand. That you’re left knowing that much more about love and what it can do, and the pain that only a hole in your heart and space in your bed and emptiness in the next chair over can bring. Whether or not that hole will ever again include the person who made it that way… I don’t know. Whether or not anybody else can match the outline of someone who was so deeply impressed in you… I don’t know that either.
We all start as strangers. The choices we make in terms of love are usually ones that seem inevitable anyway. We find people irrationally compelling. We find souls made of the same stuff ours are. We find classmates and partners and neighbors and family friends and cousins and sisters and our lives intersect in a way that makes them feel like they couldn’t have ever been separate. And this is lovely. But the ease and access isn’t what we crave. It isn’t what I’m writing about right now. It isn’t what we revolve around after it’s gone. We are all just waiting for another universe to collide with ours, to change what we can’t ourselves. It’s interesting how we realize the storm returns to calm, but we see the stars differently now, and we don’t know, and we can’t choose, whose wreckage can do that for us.
We all start as strangers, but we forget that we rarely choose who ends up a stranger too.TC Mark

Saturday, May 13, 2017

Dr. Stanley Krippner – Native American Shamanism, Dream Experimentation, Parapsychology




Episode 92 – Dr. Stanley Krippner – Native American Shamanism, Dream Experimentation, Parapsychology

Dr. Stanley Krippner, a beloved and prolific teacher, facilitator, and researcher in humanist psychology and its many facets, shows no signs of slowing down. Going into his 85th year on this planet, he’s still keeping pace. And for this, we are thankful. Even if you don’t currently know about parapsychology, altered states, dream telepathy, and the like, your gratitude will be happy delayed reaction. A small bio does him no justice. His vitae are mind-blowingly extensive. Going into his 85th year on this planet, he’s still keeping pace. He is considered a PIONEER in the field of consciousness, has worked exclusively with the likes of Timothy Leary, Alan Watts, Jerry Garcia and other members of the Grateful Dead. This is a wonder filled conversation from the mind of a person who has witnessed and been actively part of a revolution in the way we understand consciousness, and consciousness studies. You will love this episode!
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What gaslighting is, and how to spot the signs of it in a relationship

This is important information, especially for women.  Once you know about gaslighting, you will likely recognize it, and many of the "crazy feelings" the gaslighter hopes to evoke in his prey will look familiar.  That recognition is much of the "cure" for yourself. It took me a while to recognize that a few in my extended family are skilled at this. I am praying their victims read this.
Hopefully, you will recognize it in a moment.

According to the experts
Gaslighting, like many other types of emotional abuse, is often hard to identify, which is partially what makes it so dangerous. A form of “persistent manipulation and brain washing”, it’s a tactic intended to make you doubt yourself and ultimately completely lose your sense of identity and self-worth.
It takes its name from the 1944 film “Gaslight”, where a man tries to convince his wife she’s insane by making her question herself and reality. But it can be much more subtle than that. Although it’s associated with romantic relationships it can also happen in the workplace or in politics. Any asymmetric power dynamic in a relationship, with a person who makes unreasonable judgements and micro-aggressions which aren’t based in fact, is emotional manipulation – and probably gaslighting.
Preston Ni, author of “How to Successfully Handle Gaslighters and Stop Psychological Bullying”, identified seven main symptoms of this specific type of emotional abuse. These are the main warning signs:

1. Lying and exaggerating

A gaslighter might set their stage by creating a “negative narrative” about their victim, both to the gaslightee’s face and to others about them. This will inevitably put them on the defensive and give fuel to the idea that they’re “crazy” or “mental”. Ni says this might take the form of a partner saying “my girlfriend is a loser, and she needs to know the truth”, or an employer telling their employee “the work you’re doing is a waste of time and resources. How do you even justify your employment?”

2. Repeating

Much of the tactics of gaslighting as like those used in psychological warfare, such as repeating lies constantly until they become fact. Ni says this allows an abuser to constantly stay on the offensive, control the conversations and dominate their relationship.

3. Escalating

When called out on their lies an abuser will escalate the argument by “doubling or tripling down on their attacks”. This means they’ll deny any wrongdoing and refute any evidence the gaslightee might have with blame, misdirection (blaming other people), false claims and lies intended to sow doubt and confusion in the mind of the victim. One woman tells Ni: “When I caught my boyfriend sexting someone else he flatly said it didn’t happen – that I imagined the whole thing. He called me a crazy bitch.”

4. Wearing out their victim

While in this situation a victim might initially fight back, eventually the behaviour of their abuser will wear them down. They’ll become discouraged, resigned, pessimistic, afraid and self-doubting. Gaslighting over an extended period of time can make a person doubt their own self-perception, identity and reality.

5. Codependency

By assuring that their victim is constantly insecure and anxious, an abuser can ensure that they’re totally emotionally and psychologically reliant on them – basically, a codependent relationship. Ni says: “The gaslighter has the power to grant acceptance, approval, respect, safety, and security. The gaslighter also has the power (and often threatens to) take them away. A codependent relationship is formed based on fear, vulnerability, and marginalization.

6. False hope

Manipulative people aren’t stupid, so they realise that constant negativity doesn’t work. They’ll occasionally treat their victims with superficial kindness or remorse, giving them false hope that “they’re not that bad”, “things will get better” or “let’s give it a chance”. Often, Ni says, this is just a calculated maneuver – in giving their victim a “break” a gaslighter can instill complacency and force them to let their guard down, which can reinforce an unhealthy, codependent relationship.
But beware! The temporary mildness is often a calculated maneuver intended to instill complacency and have the victim’s guard down, before the next act of gaslighting begins. With this tactic, the gaslighter also further reinforces a codependent relationship.

7. Domination and control

Gaslighting is a sliding scale, but at its most extreme the ultimate objective is total control and domination over another individual, team or group. Ni writes: “By maintaining and intensifying an incessant stream of lies and coercions, the gaslighter keeps the gaslightees in a constant state of insecurity, doubt, and fear. The gaslighter can then exploit his or her victims at will, for the augmentation of his power and personal gain.”

Red Pill Logic: Gaslighting Narratives

Red Pill Logic: Gaslighting Narratives



I once made the statement that men are not red pilled through the existence of the red pill, they are red pilled through their own experiences, and are educated in what actually took place by the red pill. The impetus to seek out the literature, videos, and communities that make up the sphere is always a reaction to an observation that contradicts what he has been told. As a social species, our history is full of stories that are used to educate and socialize children, and it’s a common technique to convey information, precisely because of the persuasive and memorable narratives that are tied in with the information.
One of the first things a recent red pill man discovers is that many of the narratives that have shaped his relationships with the opposite sex are at best false and at worst deliberately misleading. Most men are raised with a string of narratives, most fairy tales end with the prince getting his princess and living happily ever after, the supplicating Beta male finally nails his prom-queen, the rule-following, law abiding, dutiful man wins and the alpha, rule-breaking, egocentric man gets his comeuppance. The prevalence of such narratives make perfect sense from a social perspective, after all a society where there is no rule of law, no morality and no code of behavior is bound to rapidly de-evolve into a free for all. However, the danger of widespread narratives is that when they are proven to be false, the ones who espouse them are viewed as less credible.
A child who is informed that his parents have been lying about Santa Claus for years and years is bound to question what else he has been told by his parents that is false information. This is a natural human reflex, when a person proves themselves as untrustworthy, everything they have ever said or done is questioned as a result. If the parents continue to attempt to maintain the lie, and instead question the perceptive abilities of their child, this is what is known as “Gaslighting“. (continue by clicking above on link)

Tuesday, May 9, 2017

4 Signs That Someone Is Probably Insecure | Psychology Today

4 Signs That Someone Is Probably Insecure | Psychology Today

(artist unknown)

(artist unknown)

"Yes, It's Totally Possible to Gaslight A Kid"

Yes, It’s Totally Possible To Gaslight A Kid

The suddenly ubiquitous and frequently misused term “gaslighting” comes from the 1938 play, and later film, Gas Light, which follows a husband who manipulates elements of his wife’s reality, slowly driving her insane. Specifically, it refers to him slowly turning down the lights while denying doing so, forcing her to question her own perception of the world by subtly adjust norms. Over the last few decades, the term has been used mostly to describe men dismissing women and politicians attempting to question the premises of fact-based policies. The popularity of the term stems from the hard truth behind it: Anyone can be convinced that they’re crazy.
That is doubly true when that anyone happens to be a child.
According to Dr. George Simon, psychologist and author who specializes in manipulation, gaslighting is a complicated form of emotional abuse can occur in platonic, professional, and familial relationships. Parents do it. It’s just sometimes harder to notice because kids often occupy fantasies. But there is a different between dissuading a child of something false or fiction and persuading a child to believe something untrue.
“It’s not gaslighting if the kid is being appropriately corrected for their fanciful or their distorted take on reality,” says Simon, adding that convincing kids to believe in Santa and the Tooth Fairy isn’t technically gaslighting either. “Those are tactics of manipulation and control. But they’re relatively benign.”
What isn’t benign is covert aggression.  When a person suffers from a character disturbance or personality disorder, they may be tempted to manipulate others for their gain. When this is done so that the child can’t figure out what’s going on, the kid is being gaslit. This can be a particularly powerful experience for the child because its unlikely that they’ll have developed the self-assurance to question remain confident in their outlook despite the objections of others. This means that they can quickly be taught not to trust themselves. Over time and depending on how bad the emotional abuse is, this can make it nearly impossible for a them to get a grasp on reality.
child sitting on couch
Generally speaking, the people who gaslight children are generally deeply insecure or narcissistic. In both cases, the adult is motivated by a desire to have a child think of them in a very specific way. This tends to result in certain patterns of misrepresentation and mistruth. “It’s kind of like the emperor’s new clothes,” says Simon, “the narcissist doesn’t like to be exposed.”
Should people who don’t crave the approval of a child be concerned that they might gaslight one anyway? Not really. It’s very difficult to gaslight a person, at least in a textbook sense, by accident because intent is at the core of the transgression. Still, Simon is quick to add that it’s quite possible to create a “gaslighting effect” without realizing it. Trying to get a child to see the world through the eyes of another by, for instance, being dismissive of their imaginary friend, can be harmful or confusing. But that’s not abuse; it’s a nearly inevitable product of hanging out with a tiny person that doesn’t have a strong grip on reality.
A father of two, Simon is open about the fact that he worried about accidentally gaslighting his kids when they were growing up. What he didn’t worry about was his intention, which was to raise happy people. Over time, he made peace with the idea that it was that intention that mattered.
“They knew the love was there and had a certain innate confidence that whatever was coming their way, was not designed to demean them,” he say. “It was all about their welfare.”
That’s not called gaslighting; that’s called parenting. It’s also a crazy-making thing, but in a very different way.

Big Pharma Schemes to Destroy Cancer Drug Supply to Drive UP Price!

A major pharmaceutical company is in hot water this week after it was revealed that they considered destroying their own stockpiles of vital cancer treatment medication in order to raise prices.
Aspen Pharmacare had a problem – they could continue to sell their drugs at a lower price, or they could just destroy their supplies in order to artificially inflate the value of what they produced. Placing profit over human life was of course their only course of action.
An investigation by the Times uncovered this planned evil, discovering that the company was seeking to mark up their product 4,000 percent in its distribution to Spanish markets, according to internal emails.
According to these emails, Aspen began withholding five cancer drugs from the market in Spain in May of 2014, forcing residents to search elsewhere for replacement drugs. Aspen held the Spanish government hostage over the drugs, internally suggesting that they would destroy their stocks unless the Spanish health ministry did not agree to the substantial price hike.
As RT notes, Spain wasn’t the only target of Aspen’s price gouging. In fact, they had been seeking substantial cost increases across Europe for the past several years. In each country, Aspen warned the health department – agree to our substantial rate hikes, or get no drugs at all.
The practice of destroying old stock in order to protect the integrity of high-cost items like luxury clothing and accessories is not unheard of, but the idea of applying those same principles in order to keep life-saving medications costly is inhuman. It’s one thing for Abercrombie & Fitch to burn their end-of-season clothing to keep them from filling up Goodwills, it’s another thing entirely to deprive sick Americans from access to cancer medication in order to rake in more money.
Currently in the U.K., there are no protections from companies holding their products hostage in the name of a higher pricetag. In response to frauds like Aspen, the government is now considering legislation allowing it to regulate drug prices if they deem the current cost to be excessive.
Aspen Pharmaceutical is being just like every other company in the Big Pharma gambit – seeking to take advantage of its consumers to make an extra buck, no matter the cost.
 Sydney Robinson is a political writer for the Ring of Fire Network. She has also appeared in political news videos for Ring of Fire. Sydney has a degree in English Literature from the University of West Florida, and has an active interest in politics, social justice, and environmental issues. She would love to hear from you on Twitter @SydneyMkay or via email at srobinson@ringoffireradio.com

Sunday, April 16, 2017

Praying for Those Who Hurt Us - The High Calling - Theology of Work

An often difficult spiritual task, for Easter, 2017


Praying for Those Who Hurt Us

Daily Reflection / Produced by The High Calling

Praying for Those Who Hurt Us
"Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you."
When Jesus calls us to love our enemies, we might wonder what that really means in practice. Surely, we're not to get all warm and fuzzy when we think about those who seek to hurt us. That's our culture's view of romantic love, not the kind of robust, challenging love envisioned by Jesus, a love that is more about action than about feelings. But what sorts of action embody a love for our enemies?
Jesus gives several specific examples in Luke 6:27-36. In verse 28, for example, he says: "Bless those who curse you." To bless, in this instance, means to speak well of someone or to speak kindly to that person. Perhaps there is someone in your place of work who is spreading false rumors about you in order to advance above you. How will you respond? According to Jesus, not by retaliating. Rather, you are to love this "enemy" by speaking well of him, even when his back is turned. Or, when you see her, you should address her politely and graciously.
Jesus adds, "Pray for those who hurt you." There is nothing wrong with asking the Lord to get them to stay their hand. But praying for them involves asking good for them, seeking the Lord's presence in their lives and transformation of their hearts.
Prayer of this sort may sound easy enough in the abstract, but when you are really praying for real enemies, it can feel counterintuitive and even offensive. In the week following the attacks of 9/11/2001, Irvine Presbyterian Church joined thousands of other churches across our nation in hosting a special prayer service. We poured out our grief to the Lord. We asked him to comfort the families of those who had died. We prayed for firefighters and police officers, many who were risking their lives in the wreckage of the World Trade Center.
And we prayed for our enemies, for those who had planned the attacks and were no doubt plotting further harm to the United States. I was responsible for this particular prayer, and I labored over it for hours. What I wanted to say was, "Lord, wipe them out. Destroy them," but I sensed that this was not what Jesus meant when he taught us to pray for our enemies. So, I did pray that those who had planned the attacks would be brought to justice, knowing that is was consistent with God's will. But I also prayed that God would touch their hearts, bringing them to repentance. I asked that he would reveal his love and grace to them, so that their lives might be transformed.
As I prayed this way, I could sense the tension in the room. It was almost as if I had uttered profanity in my prayer. Nobody stormed out in anger. And, near as I can recall, nobody even sent me a nasty email. I did have a few people comment on my "bold prayer." For me, praying for our enemies that day was truly one of the hardest things I ever have had to do as a pastor. It was an act of sheer obedience.
I've said it before. Loving our enemies is not easy. Nor is it easy to bless them or to pray for them. But this is the way of Jesus.
FURTHER REFLECTION:
Have you ever blessed someone who was speaking poorly of you? How did it feel? What happened inside of you when you did this? Have you ever prayed for those who hurt you? Are there people in your life right now who are seeking to harm you, for whom you need to pray? What keeps you from praying for your enemies? What helps you to do it?
PRAYER:
Dear Lord, you know how hard it is to do what you ask in this verse. You know because you did it. You blessed those who cursed you, even as you suffered in agony on the cross. You asked the Father to forgive those who were torturing you to death.
And you ask me to imitate you in this behavior. I must confess that part of me just doesn't want to do this. I want to ignore your command, Lord. I want to pretend as if it's not really for me. Yet your word is clear.
Help me to bless those who curse me and pray for my enemies. Yes, I ask for the grace to pray for global enemies, for those who would continue to want to hurt me and my fellow citizens. But I also ask you to help me pray for the "little enemies" in my life, for people at work who get under my fingernails, for the politicians whose views drive me crazy, for the check-out clerk who didn't even say "thank you." May my heart be trained so that my first instinct when someone wrongs me is to lay that person before you in prayer.
Today, Lord, I also want to pray for my brothers and sisters who are confronting enemies who do far more than curse. I pray for those who are facing harassment, torture, and even the possibility of martyrdom because of their faith. Yes, I continue to pray for their deliverance, for justice and protection. But I also pray that you will give them the supernatural ability to love as you call us all to love, even to pray for those who hurt them.
I pray in the name of Jesus, who lived what he commanded. Amen.
Note: This reflection was originally published in 2011.

"I Give You This One Thought to Keep......by Native American



by Native American..........



I give you this one thought to keep:
I am with you still - I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow;
I am the diamond glints on snow;
I am the sunlight on ripened grain;
I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you awaken in the morning's hush
     of quiet birds in circled flight;
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
     Do not think of me as gone.
I am with you in each new dawn.........



"What Aristotle Taught Me About Happiness" by Eva Gregory



Aristotle had more to say about happiness than any other philosopher before him. While he called it by a different name, eudaimonia, much of what he said is still relevant today.
See how a quick look at Aristotle’s thinking can help you lead a fuller and more enjoyable life.
What Aristotle Said About Happiness
1.     Pursue ultimate ends. We do a lot of things just so we can position ourselves to get something else. Obtaining wealth may symbolize security or luxury for us. Aristotle argues that happiness is the highest good because we value it for itself.
2.     Resist immediate gratification. Challenging activities are usually more rewarding than passive pleasures. It’s tempting to turn on the TV after a hard day at the office, but talking with friends or working on hobbies will probably make us feel better.
3.     Carve out time to reflect. Aristotle says the ability to reason is what makes humans unique. Consider your core values and how to honor them.
4.     Get moving. Put your thoughts into action. Aristotle provided a list of virtues that can guide us to attaining happiness.
The Table of Virtues
1.     Face your fears. Have the courage to be true to yourself. Venturing beyond your comfort zone can bring great rewards.
2.     Practice moderation. Temperance helps you to enjoy basic pleasures without going to extremes. Stop at one chocolate chip cookie.
3.     Spend wisely. Liberality is expressed by using resources wisely. Put your time and your income to good use. Prioritize your daily activities.
4.     Appreciate quality. You can still enjoy the good things in life. Magnificence is at work when you treat your friends to a dinner you can afford instead of being stingy or trying to impress people.
5.     Believe in yourself. You may be used to thinking of magnanimity as generosity. Here it means knowing your worth.
6.     Set goals. Pride can be a good thing when you tie it to your achievements and helping others. Direct your ambitions towards worthy causes.
7.     Cultivate patience. A good temper allows us to wait our turn graciously. Perseverance plays a big part in any success.
8.     Tell the truth. Level with yourself and others. You’ll gain a reputation for being trustworthy and avoid a lot of stress. Acknowledge when you make an error. Let your loved ones know how you really feel even when it seems awkward. It may lead to constructive discussions and closer relationships.
9.     Have a laugh. There’s a light side to Aristotle. He knew that wittiness draws people closer together and provides relief during difficult times. Look for the humor in situations like a long afternoon at your local Department of Motor Vehicles or your puppy picking out your most expensive shoes to chew up.
10. Treasure your friends. Aristotle viewed a complete friendship as one of the greatest goods because it combines pleasure and virtue. Appreciate your loved ones and wish all good things for them.
11. Display modesty. Humility helps us to recognize our limits and get along with others. It’s easier to grow and learn new things when you understand that everyone can teach you something beneficial.
12. Rejoice in other’s good fortune. Aristotle cautions us about avoiding envy or spitefulness when others get the things we want for ourselves. Congratulate a colleague for their recent success and you may be more likely to succeed soon yourself.
You can choose to live a happy life. Give Aristotle’s advice a try. Rely on your reasoning, love your friends, and practice virtue. Living up to your potential will bring you greater bliss.
About Eva
Eva Gregory is a mentor to spiritual entrepreneurs, coaches and holistic practitioners, Law of Attraction expert, speaker and author. Her passion is teaching spiritual entrepreneurs how to tap into their own inner guidance and merge it with the practical steps to create healthy sustainable businesses from a place of purpose, passion and prosperity. Get your FREE REPORT: “Massive Success For Spiritual Entrepreneurs” here. Learn more about how Eva can help you at www.EvaGregory.com.