~ Certified Transpersonal Hypnotherapist ~ Dream Analysis (Jungian, Gestalt, Freudian) Workshops ~ Trained Psychotherapist: 13 Years Experience (Gestalt, Jungian, Zen, Reality and Energy Therapies) ~ Men and Their Journey: the neuroscience of the male brain, and the implications in sexuality, education and relationship ~ Women: Their Transformation and Empowerment ~ ATOD (Alcohol, Tobacco and Other Drugs) : 21 years experience ~ Ordained Interfaith Minister & Official Celebrant ~ Child and Human Rights Advocate ~ Spiritual Guide and Intuitive ~ Certified Reiki Practitioner ~ Mediation / Conflict Resolution • “Intentional Love” Parenting Strategy Groups ~ Parenting Workshops ~ Coaching for parents of Indigo, Crystal, and Rainbow Children ~ International Training: Israel & England ~ Critical Incident Stress Debriefing ~ Post-911 and Post-Katrina volunteer


M.S. UNC-Chapel Hill

The degree of our enlightenment is the degree of passion that we will have for the whole world." ~The Greystone Mandala~ ~

"An Unending Love"

This blog and video is devoted and dedicated to my daughter, my grand daughters, and my grand son. They are hearts of my heart. Our connection through many lives..... is utterly infinite.

By happy fraternity amongst themselves, the embodied beings get the supreme peace. Then all this earth shines like one house. When the men, the embodied beings, treat each other with equal respect and have good brotherly feelings amongst themselves, great peace and harmony abound. Then all this earth shines like one house. The whole world shines like the one dwelling house of the entire human family.

~Ramana Maharshi~



Sunday, January 25, 2015

PLOS Medicine: A Comparison of DSM-IV and DSM-5 Panel Members' Financial Associations with Industry: A Pernicious Problem Persists

And we wonder why we are constantly pummeled by TV prescription drug ads, pharmacies and hospitals hounding us to get flu shots (which in this year have roughly about a 30% chance of success in the elderly, and "new" diagnoses every day (of course the y are ones which would benefit from pharmaceutical drugs).......PLOS Medicine: A Comparison of DSM-IV and DSM-5 Panel Members' Financial Associations with Industry: A Pernicious Problem Persists

Most adults would likely fail this 1912 8th grade test—try it

"Now HERE is a reality test!"  (So much for "No child left behind!)

Most adults would likely fail this 1912 8th grade test—try it

Thursday, January 22, 2015

7 Big Lies 'American Sniper' Is Telling America | Alternet

"The film American Sniper, based on the story of the late Navy Seal Chris Kyle, is a box office hit, setting records for an R-rated film released in January. Yet the film, the autobiography of the same name, and the reputation of Chris Kyle are all built on a set of half-truths, myths and outright lies that Hollywood didn't see fit to clear up."  CLICK HERE TO READ....

Monday, January 12, 2015

Former SEAL Chris Kyle Allegedly Killed by Former Marine He Was Trying to Help - ABC News

Former SEAL Chris Kyle Allegedly Killed by Former Marine He Was Trying to Help - ABC News

Why Is the Real American Sniper -- a Hate-Filled Killer -- Being Treated as a Hero? | Alternet

When I read this exceptional review, I felt compelled to share it. As a part of my life's path, I have known several snipers, up close and personal. It has provided an acute sense of the folks they really are "down under".  While the views I have garnered are quite varied, no doubt because of the character of the person before they even engaged in that "job".  I say job, because there are many types of training, "employers", time in active duty, length of time performing the job, and the entire ecology of that person, etc. 

I confess, when in any danger, I would be thrilled to have one of these folks "at my six" with their generally superlative training and keen instincts.  At the same time, we would be naive not to take into account the percentage of sociopaths in any one of our services.  How a Kyle could have made it as far as he did, with his disturbing statements and clear proclivities, remains to be seen....and see we will.

The "Kyles" in our services/ops are a psychologically interesting sort with much that forms them.  So, my likely intention is to see the film. The trailers do intrigue me, not the least of which is Bradley Cooper, immensely pleasing to the eyes.  But that is a point from which to proceed...the eyes, that is.  In each of the trailers, Cooper plays the role with sharpness and clarity, in being able to fix his eyes in a vacuous, "sold my soul to the devil", "no one is really home here", chilling sort of way.  His wife is oblivious to this...amazing.  But it is clear something is stirring in her soul.  It may be that to really acknowledge that, she must face her own demons head on.  Whether she does that will be revealed in the film.

Quotes author and former Daily Beast writer Max Blumenthal. “Kill every male you see,”Rania Khalek quoted, calling Kyle an “American psycho”.

But, see for yourself...let me make that, your Self. by Madelaine Watson

Why Is the Real American Sniper -- a Hate-Filled Killer -- Being Treated as a Hero?

Retaliation from the rightwing twittersphere about the criticism of Chris Kyle was swift and violent.
"I have to confess: I was suckered by the trailer for American Sniper. It’s a masterpiece of short-form tension – a confluence of sound and image so viscerally evocative it feels almost domineering. You cannot resist. You will be stressed out. You will feel. Or, as I believe I put it in a blog about the trailer, “Clint Eastwood’s American Sniper trailer will ruin your pants.”
But however effective it is as a piece of cinema, even a cursory look into the film’s backstory – and particularly the public reaction to its release – raises disturbing questions about which stories we choose to codify into truth, and whose, and why, and the messy social costs of transmogrifying real life into entertainment."    CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE

Is the U.S. Crazy? | Alternet BY ANN JONES


Is the U.S. Crazy?

Inquiring minds from around the world want to know.
Photo Credit: Jan Mika/
To stay on top of important articles like these, sign up to receive the latest updates from  here.
"Americans who live abroad -- more than six million of us worldwide (not counting those who work for the U.S. government) -- often face hard questions about our country from people we live among. Europeans, Asians, and Africans ask us to explain everything that baffles them about the increasingly odd and troubling conduct of the United States.  Polite people, normally reluctant to risk offending a guest, complain that America’s trigger-happiness, cutthroat free-marketeering, and “exceptionality” have gone on for too long to be considered just an adolescent phase. Which means that we Americans abroad are regularly asked to account for the behavior of our rebranded “homeland,” now conspicuously in decline and increasingly out of step with the rest of the world.
In my long nomadic life, I’ve had the good fortune to live, work, or travel in all but a handful of countries on this planet.  I’ve been to both poles and a great many places in between, and nosy as I am, I’ve talked with people all along the way. I still remember a time when to be an American was to be envied. The country where I grew up after World War II seemed to be respected and admired around the world for way too many reasons to go into here.
That’s changed, of course. Even after......"  CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING

Monday, January 5, 2015

The scientific evidence against spanking, timeouts, and sleep training - Quartz

Be aware that Bryson is NOT saying to abstain from any discipline and/or training.  (I can see the emails, now!)

"Bryson is not alone in this approach. She is part of a progressive new group of scientists, doctors, and psychologists whose goal is ambitious, if not outright audacious: they want to redefine “discipline” in order to change our culture. They want to rewrite, or perhaps more precisely said, rewire how we approach interacting with kids, and they want us to understand that our decisions about parenting affect not only our children’s minds, but ours as well."   CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING...)

Saturday, January 3, 2015

Plash | The Power of Meditation and How It Helps Us Rediscover Happiness and Productivity

"Ever since my dad tried to convince me to meditate when I was about 12, I’ve been fairly skeptical of this practice. It always seemed to be so vague and hard to understand that I just decided it wasn’t for me.
More recently, I’ve actually found how simple (not easy, but simple) meditation can be and what huge...."CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING...

Thursday, January 1, 2015

The Anti-Resolution That Could Change Your Life | Psychology Today

"There are many good reasons not to make New Years Resolutions. For one, we know from personal experience and from depressing statistics that they are highly likely to fail. The act of making grand resolutions every year, it turns out, isn’t always the best way to make positive and lasting changes. More often it just leaves us feeling frustrated and disappointed in ourselves....."CLICK TO CONTINUE

Tuesday, December 30, 2014



Thank you for your interest in Power and Control Wheel and other wheels developed by the Domestic Abuse Intervention Programs (DAIP). We invite you to download any of the wheels linked to here and use them to inform and educate your staff, clients and partners.

Because DAIP supports its work through training and curriculum sales, we produce using the wheels, which are copyrighted, in any revenue-generating activity. Please let us know if you have questions about using the wheels.   Email

FAQs About the Wheels

Why was the Power and Control Wheel created?
In 1984, staff at the Domestic Abuse Intervention Project (DAIP) began developing curricula for groups for men who batter and victims of domestic violence. We wanted a way to describe battering for victims, offenders, practitioners in the criminal justice system and the general public. Over several months, we convened focus groups of women who had been battered. We listened to heart-wrenching stories of violence, terror and survival. After listening to these stories and asking questions, we documented the most common abusive behaviors or tactics that were used against these women. The tactics chosen for the wheel were those that were most universally experienced by battered women.

Why did you call it the Power and Control Wheel?
Battering is one form of domestic or intimate partner violence. It is characterized by the pattern of actions that an individual uses to intentionally control or dominate his intimate partner. That is why the words "power and control" are in the center of the wheel. A batterer systematically uses threats, intimidation, and coercion to instill fear in his partner. These behaviors are the spokes of the wheel. Physical and sexual violence holds it all together—this violence is the rim of the wheel.

Why isn’t the Power and Control Wheel gender neutral?
The Power and Control Wheel represents the lived experience of women who live with a man who beats them. It does not attempt to give a broad understanding of all violence in the home or community but instead offers a more precise explanation of the tactics men use to batter women. We keep our focus on women’s experience because the battering of women by men continues to be a significant social problem--men commit 86 to 97 percent of all criminal assaults and women are killed 3.5 times more often than men in domestic homicides1.

When women use violence in an intimate relationship, the context of that violence tends to differ from men. First, men’s use of violence against women is learned and reinforced through many social, cultural and institutional avenues, while women’s use of violence does not have the same kind of societal support. Secondly, many women who do use violence against their male partners are being battered. Their violence is primarily used to respond to and resist the controlling violence being used against them. On the societal level, women’s violence against men has a trivial effect on men compared to the devastating effect of men’s violence against women.

Battering in same-sex intimate relationships has many of the same characteristics of battering in heterosexual relationships, but happens within the context of the larger societal oppression of same-sex couples. Resources that describe same-sex domestic violence have been developed by specialists in that field such as The Northwest Network of Bi, Trans, Lesbian and Gay Survivors of Abuse,

Making the Power and Control Wheel gender neutral would hide the power imbalances in relationships between men and women that reflect power imbalances in society. By naming the power differences, we can more clearly provide advocacy and support for victims, accountability and opportunities for change for offenders, and system and societal changes that end violence against women.

Why did you create the Equality Wheel?
The Equality Wheel was developed not to describe equality per se, but to describe the changes needed for men who batter to move from being abusive to non-violent partnership. For example, the "emotional abuse" segment on the Power and Control Wheel is contrasted with the “respect” segment on the Equality Wheel. So the wheels can be used together as a way to identify and explore abuse, then encourage non-violent change.

Has the wheel been translated into different languages?
Domestic Abuse Intervention Programs has translated the wheel into Spanish. And, the wheel has been translated by many others worldwide. The wheel has also been adapted culturally, such as the wheel adapted by Mending the Sacred Hoop to reflect some of the tactics a Native American batterer might use against his intimate partner to control her.

Can I use or adapt the wheels?
Our wheels are copyrighted. They may be used in men's educational classes, groups for battered women or community education presentations as long as they are credited to the Domestic Abuse Intervention Project as noted on the wheels. For other uses, please submit a written request explaining the desired use and purpose to our National Training Project staff.

Programs wishing to adapt the wheels in any way should submit a written request to our National Training Project staff, explaining the desired use and purpose. In making our decision, we will look at how the adapted wheel reflects power imbalances between abusers and victims, if the segments have been carefully reviewed and edited and whether a wheel would be the most effective learning tools for the adaptor’s purpose. In addition, it is important that the content of the wheel come from focus groups with those experiencing the abuse. Requests are considered on a case by case basis.

Our National Training Project staff may be contacted at

How is the Power and Control Wheel used?
The wheel is used in many settings and can be found in manuals, books, articles, and on the walls of agencies that seek to prevent domestic violence. It has even been seen by millions on national television shows and soap operas!

Many women’s groups use the Power and Control Wheel. Battered women can point to each of the tactics on the wheel and clearly explain how these behaviors were used against them. They are able to see that they are not alone in their experience and more fully understand how their batterer could exert such control over them.

The wheel is also used in counseling and education groups for men who batter to help group participants identify the tactics they use. By seeing that their behavior is not atypical for men who batter, there is an impetus (for those who are motivated to change) to explore the beliefs that contribute to their behavior. The Power and Control Wheel is used in concert with the Equality Wheel to help group participants see alternate ways of being in a relationship with a woman, free of violence and controlling behavior.

The wheel is also used in a variety of settings to describe battering. For instance, in training for law enforcement or prosecutors, the wheel provides an explanation for why a victim might return to an abusive spouse or why victim is refusing to cooperate in a criminal prosecution.

The wheel makes the pattern, intent and impact of violence visible.

Can I purchase a poster-size version of the wheels?
Yes! Click here for our poster-size wheels.

AVAILABLE WHEELS (downloadable PDF):