Sympathy for the Stay-At-Home Mom ~ New Republic / Judith Shulevitz

Sympathy for the Stay-At-Home Mom

November/December 2013

http://www.utne.com/community/stay-at-home-mom-zm0z13ndzlin.aspx

By Judith Shulevitz, from The New Republic

To reject a high-flying career, as this man did and so many women have done, is not to reject aspiration; it is to refuse to succumb to a kind of madness.


Photo By Gordon Surratt

My first mommy date—you know, those painstakingly-dressed-for occasions you hope will turn the mother of your child’s new best friend into your best friend, too—also gave me my first taste of the shame that makes the mommy wars so bitter. Tali’s husband worked on Wall Street, she was a stay-at-home mom with the children, and the playroom in their restored Victorian on a lake in Westchester was photo-spread perfect. There was an expansive, carpeted space for our toddlers to run wild in, an air-hockey table, a big-screen computer, Legos, kindergarten-grade wooden blocks, and a play house, all of it neat on a Wednesday afternoon despite there being no housekeeper in sight.
And what did this particular messy working mother feel? Pure envy: real-estate and clean-house envy, attentive-mother envy, and, when I saw her lovely kosher kitchen, Jewish envy too. Despite sending my kids to a Jewish school, I’d never quite managed the exhausting logistics of kashrut.
Getting over all this, I discovered that Tali was the child of Holocaust survivors, themselves the only living members of their families, and that, despite a wide circle of friends and an active synagogue life, she had the air of a person profoundly alone in the world. I figured that this had more to do with her history than her present situation, and that family life was her consolation. But she told me that she’d left her job in investment banking when she’d had her second child only because when she’d had her first, she’d gone part-time, which had meant working 40 hours a week instead of 60. In other words, five days a week, she had left her house in New Rochelle at 7 a.m. and returned from the city at 7 p.m. For any mother, let alone one who had obviously missed out on the warmth of a large family growing up, this would be hard to take.
The women I met through Tali were also mostly former high achievers with professional degrees—smart, appealing, non-helicoptering, non-Desperate Housewives-like, full-time, suburban mothers. They were the kind of women profiled by Lisa Belkin in her famous (or infamous) 2003 “Opt-Out Revolution” article in the New York Times Magazine; by Judith Warner in her 2005 book Perfect Madness; and by Lisa Miller’s “The Retro Wife” in New York magazine—to give just a few notable examples. These tales of handsomely educated and perfectly sane members of my sex who abandon great careers for children have become so common they constitute a genre of their own. Some of these pieces (or books) explain women’s flight from the professions as the waning of feminist ideals from one generation to the next; others blame the rise of over-mothering, attachment parenting, and other trends of that ilk; some cite all of the above. Miller’s piece introduces “neo-traditionalism,” which she defines as a rejection of feminist definitions of success. In many such essays, Betty Friedan appears as a touchstone, used to show how little has changed since she wrote The Feminine Mystique, or implicitly chided for failing to see how intractable work-life balance would prove to be. Each writer accurately characterizes their subjects’ lives and is right about the trend they represent and is by no means wrong about the pleasures and comforts of the stay-at-home mom life. And all of them, in my opinion, miss a key point.

To understand why female lawyers, doctors, bankers, academics, high-tech executives and other, often expensively pedigreed, professionals quit work to stay home, you need not search their souls for ambivalence or nostalgia. In fact, searching their souls guarantees that you won’t get the story, because it’s not to be found in individual decisions and personal stories, which are always complicated and hard to parse, but in the structural realities of the American workplace. And by this I don’t just mean the family-unfriendly policies of the kind Marissa Mayer is accused of advancing—though refusing to let workers telecommute doesn’t help, and let’s not even talk about how few American companies have on-site child care or adequate parental leave. I mean that among the professional and managerial classes, success at work requires more hours in the office, more hours on the computer at home, more trips out of town, and a much less predictable schedule than it did in Betty Friedan’s day. The life of a Joan or a Peggy at an advertising agency looks almost easy by comparison.
When Friedan was writing The Feminine Mystique, the 40-hour office job was still a norm, even for executives—a norm well on its way to changing, but a norm nonetheless. Today, whether you’re male or female, if you’re taking home an upper-middle-class salary you’re expected to work an average of 50 hours, and probably more, a lot of it after you’ve gone home. As of 1997, the average workweek for a man with graduate education was 50 hours, and for a women 47—that three-hour difference can be accounted for, of course, by all the women who went on mommy tracks. Among American dual-career couples, in the 1990s, 15.2 percent of those with at least college degrees worked a joint 100 hours a week or more, whereas only 9.6 percent of couples without diplomas did that. Try to imagine what that 100-hour workweek looked like to a child: that’s five 10-hour days, plus commutes, for both parents. And those are just averages—for people at the top of their fields, the numbers were a great deal bigger.
That the workweek is ballooning for America’s educated, salaried classes, even as it’s shrinking for less educated, hourly workers, or turning into part-time work, has been called the “time divide”—the increasing inequality of time spent working, which tracks with the rise of economic inequality. As of 2002, for example, Americans in the top fourth of earners toiled an average of 15 hours more than earners in the bottom fourth. I called the sociologist Jerry Jacobs, who along with another sociologist, Kathleen Gerson, coined the phrase in their 2005 book The Time Divide, to ask what the time divide looks like after the recession, now that so many workers, including white-collar ones, are unemployed. The workforce is more unequal than ever, he told me. “People who get a job feel that they have to be willing to work whatever they’re asked to work,” he said. And those lucky enough to work are working with greater intensity. “The American economy is producing more than it did before the recession,” he continued, “and it’s doing it with 8, 10, 12 million fewer workers. Employment isn’t where it was pre-recession, but the productivity, the total volume of stuff being produced, is higher. The only way that can happen is if people are working longer and harder.”
Confirming the sense that those at the top of the heap are feeling the pinch of our increasingly competitive world are studies reporting that they’re more stressed out than they used to be. They juggle more tasks more quickly and with more interruptions, do more work after hours at home to get it all done, and take more out-of-town trips. In 1977, according to a survey by the go-to organization for work-family balance, the Work and Families Institute, 65 percent of men said they had to work very hard at their job, and 52 percent said they had to work very fast. By 2008, those figures were 88 percent (very hard) and 73 percent (very fast). In another study, the institute reported that half as many high-paid managers and professionals (24 percent) as low-paid employees in other occupations (48 percent) say they’re able to wall off their non-work hours from contact from coworkers, supervisors, or clients. As for business travel, among employees whose earnings put them in the bottom quarter of the American pay scale, only 9 percent said they had to do it, whereas among those in the top quarter, 38 percent said they had to travel.
If such sacrifices of time are now routine for office workers, what does it take to move up through the ranks? Jacobs, who teaches at the Wharton School of Business at the University of Pennsylvania, told me the story of a recent graduate who had been determined to be among the top 10 performers among several hundred peers at a Wall Street firm. He worked non-stop for two years, getting four to five hours of sleep a night. By the end of that period, he was named the very top performer in his group—at which point he decided he’d had enough, and left finance.
To reject a high-flying career, as this man did and so many women have done, is not to reject aspiration; it is to refuse to succumb to a kind of madness. Professional accomplishment shouldn’t and doesn’t have to look like this. The main reason white-collar workers can be driven to work 80-hour-or-so weeks is that very few of them have government protections. Most of them are exempt from the Fair Labor Standards Act, which mandates the 40-hour-week and overtime pay. American managers aren’t allowed to join unions. Other countries have laws that protect against overwork even for professionals, such as standard or maximum number of hours anyone can work in a week.
And then there’s the way we talk about the problem, which makes it hard to see that the culture of overwork hurts everyone, not just those who can’t hack it. “One of the things that feminism had at its core was that it saw these as societal issues that needed to be addressed at a large scale, not at the individual level,” Ken Matos, a researcher at the Work and Families Institute said. “The narrative changed. It became the story of the unique individual who overcomes barriers in spite of all odds. That wasn’t the story that was supposed to be told.”

When my children were toddlers, I worked at home, which is to say, I didn’t do much work at all on a book I turned in four years late. So I spent a lot of quality time with mothers who weren’t trying to do anything other than mother, women who walked their children up and down my block or hung out in the parents’ room at my kids’ preschool. I admired them for having stood up to our society’s denigration of the important and unpostponable work of care; I liked them, their kids, their homes, their sense of community, and their comparative serenity; and I was scared to death of turning into one of them, of becoming a stay-at-home mom. Luckily, I’m a writer, rather than, say, a surgeon or a corporate lawyer, so all I had to do to pull myself up out of the ranks of what we’re no longer allowed to call housewives was sit down and actually write. When I meet young female undergraduates and graduate students today, which I do when I speak at universities, I don’t find them neo-traditionalist or lacking in aspiration. They don’t seem to want to stay home with their kids. They have every intention of using their formidable educations to achieve professional success, just as I did when I was in college. And like me back then, they don’t really grasp what that will require.
In our interview, Jacobs told me about a recent class in which he and his students discussed a study done of graduates of the University of Chicago’s business school. After 10 years, the study’s researchers found, the female graduates were making half of what their male classmates were making; the 90th percentile for women was where the median was for men. “Of course,” added Jacobs, “they’re all making a ton of money. It’s not like you could feel terrible for these women. But in terms of the disparity, it was pretty dramatic.” As the discussion continued, the young women in the class started putting their heads in their hands or on their desks. They hadn’t heard any of this before. But they’ll be hearing a lot more of it in the years to come.
Judith Shulevitz is the science editor and chief science writer of The New Republic, as well as a regular contributor to The New York Times. Her latest book is The Sabbath World: Glimpses of a Different Order of Time (Random House, 2010). Reprinted from The New Republic (March 21, 2013), a monthly magazine that tackles politics, culture, and big ideas from an unbiased and thought provoking perspective.

The Best-Kept Secret To Highly Successful Couples ~ Huffington Post / Adam Grant

"According to Adam Grant, Wharton's most popular and youngest tenured faculty member and the author of Give and Take: A Revolutionary Approach to Success, people fall into one of three distinct categories: givers, matchers and takers. While Grant's book is written for a business audience, its theories provide extraordinary insight into romantic relationships. The category you fall into may well determine the success and happiness of your relationship.

For example, has a romantic relationship ever made you feel like you were not good enough? Have you ever been taken advantage of by a romantic partner? Have you ever felt like you gave everything to someone and ended up completely worn out? Then you may just fall into the "giver" style of romantic partner….."    CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING

"Legalize Marijuana"! | The Nation

Despite growing support for legalization and the lack of any clear scientific evidence of marijuana’s health hazards, police departments in the United States make an average of almost 700,000 arrests for marijuana per year………READ THIS ARTICLE BASED ON LOGIC!

"How Teaching Kids Gratitude in School Makes Kids Happier" ~ Huffington Post / Emily Campbell

This article originally appeared on Greater Good, published by the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley. For more, please visitgreatergood.berkeley.edu.

Posted: 11/22/2013 8:44 am EST  |  Updated: 11/22/2013 9:19 am EST

By Emily Campbell

As Thanksgiving approaches, kids may start hearing and thinking more about gratitude at school. Maybe they'll make handprint turkeys and write something they're thankful for on each feather, or do something similar. Sure, it's a nice exercise, but does being grateful really make a difference for kids?

Previous research clearly shows that it does. Practicing gratitude increases students' positive emotions and optimism, decreases their negative emotions and physical symptoms, and makes them feel more connected and satisfied with school and with life in general.

But most of these studies have been done with upper-middle-class students in middle or high school. The results raised the question: Would these findings hold true for other types of students, particularly younger kids or kids in high-risk situations?

Two new studies find that gratitude is associated with real positive effects in the lives of these kinds of kids -- enough to suggest that it should be a focus for students all-year round.

Making Young Kids More Grateful
Jeffrey Froh is a pioneering researcher of gratitude in youth. He and colleagues tested a new kind of gratitude curriculum for elementary school children (ages 8 to 11), the youngest studied thus far. First, children learned about the three types of appraisals that make us feel grateful:

• That someone has intentionally done something to benefit us
• That providing this benefit was costly to them
• That the benefit is valuable to us

After one week of daily half-hour lessons, these students showed significant increases in grateful thinking and grateful mood -- meaning that the lessons worked. Also, when all the children were given the chance to write thank-you notes to the PTA after a presentation, the students wrote 80 percent more notes than kids who didn't receive the lessons, showing that their enhanced gratitude translated into more grateful behavior.

In the second part of the study, researchers delivered the curriculum over five weeks, with one lesson per week. The students' outcomes were tested right after the program ended and then several more times, up to five months later.

Compared to kids who didn't get the lessons in gratitude, these children showed steady increases in grateful thinking, gratitude, and positive emotions over time. In fact, the differences between the two groups were greatest five months after the program ended, indicating that the gratitude lessons had lasting effects.

Overall, this study suggests that even young students can learn to look at the world through more grateful eyes -- and that they may become not only more appreciative but also happier as a result.

Working with at-risk youth
In another recent study, Mindy Ma and colleagues looked at gratitude in a very different kind of population than those used in previous youth gratitude studies: African-American adolescents (ages 12 -14) in low-income, low-performing urban schools.

They wanted to know if, in this kind of high-risk environment, gratitude would help protect them from stresses they faced at home and school. The researchers surveyed almost 400 students from three different middle schools to see if they felt grateful emotion in response to things others do that benefit them (which researchers call "moral-affect" gratitude) or if they tended to focus on and appreciate the positives in our lives and the world (called "life-orientation" gratitude for short).

The researchers found that those who were more likely to feel grateful to others also scored higher on academic interest, grades, and extracurricular involvement; those who appreciated the positives in general scored lower on risky behaviors like drug use and sexual attitudes and activity. One factor, positive family relationships, was associated with both types of gratitude. In other words, at least for this group of students, moral-affect gratitude seemed to enhance the positive conditions of their lives, while life-orientation gratitude seemed to buffer against some common high-risk pitfalls.

Of course, this study couldn't determine whether gratitude actually caused the good outcomes (or vice versa). But it did provide promising evidence that gratitude can play a critical role in protecting at-risk adolescents' from the difficulties of their lives, possibly by broadening their mindsets and building their personal resources and coping skills.

Future studies should include experiments with programs -- such as Froh's new curriculum, perhaps -- to test the effects of teaching gratitude in at-risk populations as well. Which might give us all something more to celebrate on Thanksgiving!

7 (Realistic) Ways to Reduce Stress ~ Huffington Post / John Tsilimparis

John Tsilimparis

Writer, Psychotherapist, Featured on A&E's 'OBSESSED'

7 (Realistic) Ways To Minimize Stress

Deep Breathing vs. Shallow Breathing 
Breathing deeply can help to reduce your stress and provide oxygen to your brain to help you focus. Most people do not know how to "deep breath" and so they end up breathing shallow breaths which can cause hyperventilation.

Place your hand on your stomach and push your tummy out. Then breathe deeply by watching your tummy and your chest rise. As you do it, think of some aspect of the breathing, like your lungs expanding with air or the air itself, passing through your nostrils. Hold it for three seconds then exhale through your mouth. If you do five rounds of the deep breathing three times per day you will greatly reduce your stress level.

Many people take the benefits of deep breathing for granted. It is an integral part of stress reduction that cannot be ignored. And most importantly, it gives the "racing mind" something to focus on other than the stresses of the day. Breathing deeply is the ultimate distraction.

Muscle Relaxation 
The process of slowly tensing and then relaxing muscle groups of your choosing is very important also. It accomplishes two goals, it naturally relaxes your muscles since you are probably very tense from stress and it distracts the "racing mind" by helping it focus on something different.

Stretch or tense muscle group for five to 10 seconds, and then release the pressure. You can do this for the same muscle groups multiple times. It's up to you which ones you choose. For example, start with your feet and ankles and work your way up. Stretch and tense your wrists, arms and shoulders. Then neck and face.

For the morning or evening stretch, lay flat on your back and cross your right leg over your body and pivot your hips to follow it so that your knee touches the floor. Do the same with the other leg. You can also pull your knees up to your chest, etc.

Ground Yourself
Sitting and "white-knuckling" through your stress hoping it will go away will only make it worse. The trick is to "ground" yourself in a tangible activity that will bring you back to reality. It will remind you that you are okay! Distract your mind by doing a concrete task around the house like cleaning, washing, organizing a closet, etc. You may read, or do a crossword puzzle or call a friend. Or, try running your fingers along the teeth of your keys, squeezing a stress ball, or holding any object in your hand that you can focus on, etc. Do not sit home alone and do not watch TV.

Thought Replacement 
Thought replacement techniques have been around for years and they actually work if you know how to use them. When you experience a negative thought that is causing you stress, say "stop" to yourself. Write it down and then cultivate an alternative thought. Write the alternative thought down even if you don't believe it will help. Alternative thoughts are simple, more rational thoughts that give you peace. They help you see the larger picture.

For example, if you think you will get fired from your job because you were recently late for a very important meeting, stop that thought immediately and replace it with a more rational thought: "I am only human and can't always predict traffic. My self-worth is not dependent on being a perfect employee."

Guided Imagery 
Close your eyes and try to think of a safe place that represents peace and calm. It could be your home, a beach, a forest, or being in the presence of a loved one or your favorite pet. Then imagine going there and embracing the experience with open arms. What are the sounds, smells and the particular sights you see? Get specific and keep deepening the details of the imagery until you feel your stress level come down. Try this two times per day.

Accept your Anxiety 
Cultivating radical acceptance of your symptoms of stress is the first step towards reducing its power over you. Accept that that you are scared, and scrutinize the negative thoughts you are having. Is it danger or discomfort? Most of the time, our stress is the "anticipatory" kind which is when we panic about things in the future that have not happened yet or about things that will never happen.

Don't assume that just because you are stressed, there must be danger lurking somewhere. Stress skews our thoughts and tricks us into thinking that way.

Exercise 
We all know that exercise releases endorphins which are responsible for increasing your minds ability to elevate mood and feel good. Exercise does not only mean heavy cardio activities or going to the gym for three hours every day. It simply means being as active as possible like taking a 15- to 30-minute walk once or twice a day. It can also mean "light" cardio like bike riding, a short hike, playing tennis or golf. It also means taking a yoga or Pilates class. The more you are active the better you will feel. If you are a couch potato, your chances of elevating your mood and reducing stress are slim to none.

Right-wing “family expert”: "Treating husbands and wives as equals is unchristian" - SALON / KATIE MCDONOUGH

Russell Moore called egalitarian marriages "false gospel" that defy the Bible …  CLICK HERE TO READ:

The Singular Waste of America's Healthcare System in 1 Remarkable Chart ~ The Atlantic

The U.S. spends far, far more per person than any other rich country on healthcare. We don't get more for it.   CLICK HERE TO READ!

The U.S. Health Care System Is Terrible, In 1 Enraging Chart - Huffington Post

"Hello, did you know the American health-care system is terrible? It is. Don't let John Boehner tell you otherwise.

If you're unconvinced, here is a chart that demonstrates its terribleness. It shows, using OECD data, how much money different countries spend on health care per person, charted against life expectancy in each of those countries. As you can see, there is a pretty close relationship between health-care spending and life expectancy. Except for one very, very terrible country. Can you spot it?"…    CLICK HERE TO READ DETAILS OF THIS UNCONSCIONABLE FACT!

An Introvert’s Guide to Reality / Psychology Today / Arnie Kozak, Ph.D.

Extroverts have a socially-embedded sense of self. “Me” arises out of a wide array of social connections, activities, and stimulation. While most introverts have rich and meaningful relationships, their sense of self is not as socially embedded as the extroverts. Introverts have an introspective-narrative-embedded sense of self.

The flower and face experiment lends some support to this notion. In 2011, a study was published by I. Fishman et al. in the journal, Cognitive Neuroscience.   CLICK HERE TO READ MORE…

"A Theory About Why the Powerful Don't Care For the Powerless" / Psychology Today / Eric Horowitz

CLIK HERE TO READ: A Theory About Why the Powerful Don't Care For the Powerless

"George Zimmerman’s Icarus complex" - The Washington Post / Jonathan Capeheart

Zimmerman is a dangerous man. Let's stop using taxpayer dollars, and put him in jail. He is a typical narcissist … malignant at the very least.   In addition, the dysfunctional Florida legal and law enforcement systems play directly into his drama.   CLICK HERE TO READ ARTICLE!

Fact Check: Social Security Does Not Increase the Deficit | Alternet

"The latest volley is a shameful and distorted editorial in the Washington Postwhich attempts to downplay the retirement crisis faced by Americans and to stoke generational tensions by suggesting that Social Security is a burden on young people instead of a vital safeguard. The editorial actually mocked a sensible bill introduced by Sen. Tom Harkin (D-Iowa) that would boost Social Security benefits by increasing taxes on the wealthy. The Washington Post's nonsense was blasted by Senator Elizabeth Warren, who spoke out strongly against cuts of any kind, including Obama's "chained CPI" cut which would prevent Social Security from keeping up with seniors' increasing costs….."

CLICK HERE TO READ THIS ARTICLE!

10 Tips for Great Sex (That You Won't Find in Cosmo Magazine) | Alternet

CLICK HERE TO READ THIS ARTICLE!!: 10 Tips for Great Sex (That You Won't Find in Cosmo Magazine) | Alternet

10 Deranged Dispatches From the Right-Wing Wackosphere This Week - ALTERNET

CLICK TO READ THIS ARTICLE! 10 Deranged Dispatches From the Right-Wing Wackosphere This Week

McDonald's Advice To Underpaid Employees: Break Food Into Pieces To Keep You Full - Alternet

CLICK TO READ!! McDonald's Advice To Underpaid Employees: Break Food Into Pieces To Keep You Full

Pentagon Forged Financial Documents Amid Failure to Manage Budget (The Day Before 9/11 – Investigation

"sage:  I am remembering Donald Rumfeld’s statement on September 10, 2001 about $2.3 trillion having gone “missing” from Pentagon coffers and the resulting “crash” into the Pentagon the next day in exactly the spot where the financial documents were being processed."    CLICK TO CONTINUE READING

"Common Professions of A Narcissist" by Sam Vaknin

This is an insightful comment from an individual on the site of the Vaknin videos:

'This man is interesting because he is himself a self-described narcissist….somehow i respect him for being aware of himself …i suspect most narcissists would never admit to such a truth even if their life depended on it....i like this narcissist ...i say all his sins are forgiven in exchange for blowing the cover of countless creeps.'

Sam Vaknin has written in-depth, at length, about narcissism.  As the remark says above, this is homage to his own awareness of this condition and its malignancy. If any psychologist, psychotherapist learns about this character and personality disorder, Vaknin is likely the most followed for his acuity, and sheer excellence in his works.

This particular video is well worth listening to, and extremely interesting.

"What Is Gaslighting"? by Sam Vaknin, author and expert about narcissism / malignant narcissism

Daily Kos: Research Study Explains How U.S. Media Brainwashes The Public

BY\

by Ray Pensador


"The corruption in this country has reached such alarming levels, and the consequences when it comes to the direct harm that corruption inflicts on the population (and the world) so atrocious, that for many years now I have been wondering if the only way a population can remain so passive is if it is subjected to massive brainwashing.
Given the increasingly blunt manner in which the ruling elites continue to engage in blatant acts of corruption and oppression, born our of government and corporatist collusion, if the population were not under the control of the mind-numbing corporate media conglomerate propaganda, right now we would have the equivalent of Occupy Wall Street, ten times the size of what it was at its height…."  CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING:

So You Love An Angry Person - article by Dr. Lynne Namka

"People from all over the world write to me, mostly women but sometimes it is a man, asking about what they can do to help their family member, loved one or partner "control" his or her anger. Or how they can help "diffuse" their partner's anger. They say that their partner is "such a good guy" and his only flaw is his "anger problem." Or they feel sorry for their out-of-control child or abusive parent."  CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING

TRUTHSEEKING: No, Obama Didn't Lie to You About Your Health Care Plans | Alternet

CLICK HERE TO READ FACTS:

To the wave coming after me….from grand children to seniors!

"Gang Rape in India, Routine and Visible" - from "Want to Know" / New York Tomes

Gang Rape in India, Routine and Invisible
2013-10-27, New York Times
Posted: 2013-11-05 08:53:34
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/10/27/world/asia/gang-rape-in-india-routine-and-i...

http://www.wanttoknow.info/subscribe

The trial in [a] Mumbai gang-rape case has opened ... without the crush of reporters who documented every twist in a similar case in New Delhi in which a woman died after being gang-raped on a private bus. The Mumbai case provides an unusual glimpse into a group of bored young men who had committed the same crime often enough to develop a routine. The police say the men had committed at least five rapes in the same spot. Their casual confidence reinforces the notion that rape has been a largely invisible crime here, where convictions are infrequent and victims silently go away. Not until their arrest, at a moment when sexual violence has grabbed headlines and risen to the top of the state’s agenda, did the seriousness of the crime sink in. “It was exactly like watching a kid in school who has been caught doing something,” said [the victim's coworker], who spoke on the condition of anonymity to protect the identity of the victim, who cannot be identified according to Indian law. “It’s like a bunch of kids who found a dog and tied a bunch of firecrackers to its tail, just to see what would happen. Only in this case it was far more egregious. It was malevolent, what happened.” None of the men worked regularly. There were jobs chicken-plucking at a neighborhood stand — a hot, stinking eight-hour shift that paid 250 rupees, or $4. The men told their families they wanted something better, something indoors, but that thing never seemed to come. They passed time playing cards and drinking.

Note: For more on sex crimes, see the deeply revealing reports from reliable major media sources available here.

EXCELLENT! Daily Kos: "Won't Somebody Please Think Of The Children?"

The Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA), in their continuing effort to protect people from reality, has slapped an R-rating on Lee Hirsch’s new documentary 'Bully,' which followed the lives of middle-school & high-school students.     CLICK HERE TO READ THIS COMPREHENSIVE ARTICLE

Joel Osteen’s gay problem: The religious right is history if he can’t solve it

Joel Osteen’s gay problem: The religious right is history if he can’t solve it

The Surprising Truth About Wheat, Carbs, and Sugar – Your Brain’s Silent Killers | Alternet

The Surprising Truth About Wheat, Carbs, and Sugar – Your Brain’s Silent Killers | Alternet

You Will Be Shocked at How Ignorant Americans Really Are | Alternet

CLICK TO READ: "You Will Be Shocked at How Ignorant Americans Really Are" | Alternet

Scientists finally admit H1N1 vaccine causes increased risk of Guillain-Barre syndrome

"A new study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA) admits that the vaccine widely administered for H1N1, also known as "swine flu," is linked to causing neurological damage in the form of Guillain-Barre syndrome. The findings confirm several earlier studies in both the U.S. and U.K. that also linked the H1N1 vaccine to severe neurological damage......"  (CLICK HERE TO READ....)

"The Sankofa Bird ... and the Meaning of the Symbol"

The Meaning of the Symbol of the Sankofa Bird

The concept of SANKOFA is derived from King Adinkera of the Akan people of West Afrika.  Literally translated it means "it is not taboo to go back and fetch what you forgot".

"Sankofa" teaches us that we must go back to our roots in order to move forward. That is, we should reach back and gather the best of what our past has to teach us, so that we can achieve our full potential as we move forward. Whatever we have lost, forgotten, forgone or been stripped of, can be reclaimed, revived, preserved and perpetuated.

 Visually and symbolically "Sankofa" is expressed as a mythic bird that flies forward while looking backward with an egg (symbolizing the future) in its mouth. This is emphasizing on the fact that even though the bird is advancing, it periodically makes it a point to examine/ return to it's past, since this is the only way for one to have a better future. It affirms the belief that there must be movement and new learning as time passes, but as this forward march proceeds the knowledge of the past must never be forgotten

Some also interpret Sankofa to mean, no matter how far away one travels they must always return home.  If not physically, then figuratively.  However Sankofa is interpreted, the basic and important meaning still lies; one's past is an important aspect of one's future. So in order to make the best of one's future ... to lead a life with ongoing health and growth ...unequivocally one must visit one's past .  

Meet 3 Master Manipulators of America’s Oligarchy | Alternet

Financiers Stanley Druckenmiller, Pete Peterson and John Arnold form a trifecta of treachery.

Photo Credit: Shutterstock.com

October 24, 2013  |  

Ideas are costly, especially bogus ones. And a growing class of billionaires is more than willing to pay.

Whether they’re ginning up deficit hysteria to cut Social Security or blaming teachers and firefighters for state budget crises, these 1 percenters pose as defenders of your interests while arranging things so that they can plunder America and 
leave hard-working people with scraps.....CLICK HERE TO READ ARTICLE

Here’s how GOP Obamacare hypocrisy backfires - Michael Lind / Salon

GOP base doesn't understand right wants to turn Medicare, Social Security and more into a very similar program......

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Consumer Alert: 300+ Health Problems Linked To Statin Drugs

"A growing body of clinical research now indicates that the cholesterol-lowering class of drugs known as statins, are associated with over 300 adverse health effects -- research boldly flying in the face of national health policy, medical insurance premium guidelines, statin drug manufacturer advertising claims, and the general sentiment of the public, with approximately 1 in every 4 adult Americans over 45 currently using these drugs to "prevent heart disease."

The Cholesterol Myth

For well over 40 years, statin drugs have successfully concretized a century old myth about the primary cause of heart disease: namely, that cholesterol "causes" plaque build up in the arteries, ultimately leading to obstruction of blood flow, and subsequent morbidity and mortality.................."

CLICK TO READ THIS IMPORTANT ARTICLE

Textism: Is Spelling Over? | Alternet

".....case, the grammar that Mrs. Bustard drilled into my head served me well on standardized tests, in college and in my career, so it’s easy for me to go wobbly on rules now.  But what about today’s texting toddlers who grow up thinking that lol is a word?  Are we raising a generation of illiterates whose fuzzy spelling is the precursor of fuzzy thinking? .........
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"Get Your GOP Hands Off My Medicare!" | Alternet

CLICK TO READ THIS EXCELLENT ARTICLE!!

Backfire! GOP Hostage-Taking Boosts Obamacare's Popularity | Alternet

"Polls find Americans want more healthcare options".......“The opposition to the insurance companies is so palpable in the groups,” Greenberg said. “The biggest changes in this law is that insurance companies actually have to act like insurance companies and provide health coverage when you need it.”

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Doctors' Secret for How to Die Right | Alternet

Why do physicians make different end-of-life choices than the rest of us?
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"The religious right is a fraud: Nothing Christian about Michele Bachmann’s values" ~ Salon

"The American right obsesses over abortion and birth control, not helping people. It's different around the globe."

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"The Dark Side of Soy" ~ Mary Vance Terrain / Utne Reader

by Mary Vance Terrain

Image by Mo Riza, licensed under Creative Commons.

As someone who is conscious of her health, I spent 13 years cultivating a vegetarian diet. I took time to plan and balance meals that included products such as soy milk, soy yogurt, tofu, and Chick'n patties. I pored over labels looking for words I couldn't pronounce--occasionally one or two would pop up. Soy protein isolate? Great! They've isolated the protein from the soybean to make it more concentrated. Hydrolyzed soy protein? I never successfully rationalized that one, but I wasn't too worried. After all, in 1999 the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) approved labeling I found on nearly every soy product I purchased: 'Diets low in saturated fat and cholesterol that include 25 grams of soy protein a day may reduce the risk of heart disease.' Soy ingredients weren't only safe--they were beneficial.
After years of consuming various forms of soy nearly every day, I felt reasonably fit, but somewhere along the line I'd stopped menstruating. I couldn't figure out why my stomach became so upset after I ate edamame or why I was often moody and bloated. It didn't occur to me at the time to question soy, heart protector and miracle food.
When I began studying holistic health and nutrition, I kept running across risks associated with eating soy. Endocrine disruption? Check. Digestive problems? Check. I researched soy's deleterious effects on thyroid, fertility, hormones, sex drive, digestion, and even its potential to contribute to certain cancers. For every study that proved a connection between soy and reduced disease risk another cropped up to challenge the claims. What was going on?
'Studies showing the dark side of soy date back 100 years,' says clinical nutritionist Kaayla Daniel, author of The Whole Soy Story (New Trends, 2005). 'The 1999 FDA-approved health claim pleased big business, despite massive evidence showing risks associated with soy, and against the protest of the FDA's own top scientists. Soy is a $4 billion [U.S.] industry that's taken these health claims to the bank.' Besides promoting heart health, the industry says, soy can alleviate symptoms associated with menopause, reduce the risk of certain cancers, and lower levels of LDL, the 'bad' cholesterol.
Epidemiological studies have shown that Asians, particularly in Japan and China, have a lower incidence of breast and prostate cancer than people in the United States, and many of these studies credit a traditional diet that includes soy. But Asian diets include small amounts--about nine grams a day--of primarily fermented soy products, such as miso, natto, and tempeh, and some tofu. Fermenting soy creates health-promoting probiotics, the good bacteria our bodies need to maintain digestive and overall wellness. By contrast, in the United States, processed soy food snacks or shakes can contain over 20 grams of nonfermented soy protein in one serving.
'There is important information on the cancer-protective values of soy,' says clinical nutritionist Ed Bauman, head of Bauman Clinic in Sebastopol, California, and director of Bauman College. Bauman cautions against painting the bean with a broad brush. 'As with any food, it can have benefits in one system and detriments in another. [An individual who is sensitive to it] may have an adverse response to soy. And not all soy is alike,' he adds, referring to processing methods and quality.
'Soy is not a food that is native to North America or Europe, and you have issues when you move food from one part of the world to another,' Bauman says. 'We fare better when we eat according to our ethnicity. Soy is a viable food, but we need to look at how it's used.'
Once considered a small-scale poverty food, soy exploded onto the American market. Studies--some funded by the industry--promoted soy's ability to lower disease risk while absolving guilt associated with eating meat. 'The soy industry has come a long way from when hippies were boiling up the beans,' says Daniel.
These days the industry has discovered ways to use every part of the bean for profit. Soy oil has become the base for most vegetable oils; soy lecithin, the waste product left over after the soybean is processed, is used as an emulsifier; soy flour appears in baked and packaged goods; different forms of processed soy protein are added to everything from animal feed to muscle-building protein powders. 'Soy protein isolate was invented for use in cardboard,' Daniel says. 'It hasn't actually been approved as a food ingredient.'
Soy is everywhere in our food supply, as the star in cereals and health-promoting foods and hidden in processed foods. Even if you read every label and avoid cardboard boxes, you are likely to find soy in your supplements and vitamins (look out for vitamin E derived from soy oil), in foods such as canned tuna, soups, sauces, breads, meats (injected under poultry skin), and chocolate, and in pet food and body-care products. It hides in tofu dogs under aliases such as textured vegetable protein, hydrolyzed vegetable protein, and lecithin--which is troubling, since the processing required to hydrolyze soy protein into vegetable protein produces excitotoxins such as glutamate (think MSG) and aspartate (a component of aspartame), which cause brain-cell death.
Soy also is one of the foods--in addition to wheat, corn, eggs, milk, nuts, and shellfish--most likely to cause allergic reactions. Most people equate food allergies with anaphylaxis, or a severe emergency immune response, but it is possible to have a subclinical sensitivity, which can lead to health problems over time (and is exacerbated by the lack of variety common in today's American diet).
'People can do an empirical food sensitivity test by eliminating the food for a period of time and reintroducing it to see if there's an immune response, but most don't do this,' says Bauman. 'Genetically modified (GM) soy is the most problematic, and that's probably what most people are eating if they're not paying attention. People can develop sensitivity to a food that has antigens or bacteria not originally in the food chain, as is the case with GM foods.'
Yet avoiding GM soy doesn't mean all is well, Daniel says: 'One question I get all the time is, ?What if I only eat organic soy?' The assumption is that GM soy is problematic and organic is fine. Certainly, organic is better, but the bottom line is that soybeans naturally contain plant estrogens, toxins, and antinutrients, and you can't remove those.'
The highest risk is for infants who are fed soy formula. 'It's the only thing they're eating, they're very small, and they're at a key stage developmentally,' says Daniel. 'The estrogens in soy will affect the hormonal development of these children, and it will certainly affect their growing brains, reproductive systems, and thyroids.' Soy formula also contains large amounts of manganese, which has been linked to attention deficit disorder and neurotoxicity in infants. The Israeli health ministry recently issued an advisory stating that infants should avoid soy formula altogether.
Antinutrients in soy block enzymes needed for digestion, and naturally occur-ring phytates block absorption of essential minerals. This is most worrisome for vegans and vegetarians who eat soy as their main source of protein, and for women in menopause who up their soy intake through supplements.
Soy contains phytochemicals--plant nutrients with disease-fighting activity--called isoflavones. Studies claim isoflavones can mimic the body's own estrogens, raising a woman's estrogen levels, which fall after menopause, causing hot flashes and other symptoms. On the other hand, isoflavones may also block the body's estrogens, which can help reduce high estrogen levels, therefore reducing risk for breast cancer or uterine cancer before menopause. (High estrogen levels have been linked to cancers of the reproductive system in women.)
Although soy's isoflavones may have an adaptogenic effect (contributing to an estrogen-boosting or -blocking effect where needed), they also have the potential to promote hormone-sensitive cancers in some people. Studies on the effects of isoflavones on human estrogen levels are conflicting, and it's possible that they affect people differently. In men, soy has been shown to lower testosterone levels and sex drive, according to Daniel.
Bauman believes processed soy foods are problematic but maintains that soy has beneficial hormone-mediating effects. 'People are largely convenience-driven,' he says. 'We're looking at this whole processed-food convenience market and we're making generalizations about a plant. Is soy the problem, or is it the handling and packaging and processing of the plant that's the problem?
'Primary sources of food are a good thing. Once there was a bean, but then it got cooked and squeezed and the pulp was separated out, and it was heated and processed for better shelf life and mouth feel. Soy milk is second or third level in terms of processing.'
Bauman's eating-for-health approach calls for a variety of natural and seasonal unprocessed whole foods, including soy in moderation, tailored to individual biochemistry and sensitivities. 'Using soy as part of a diet can bring relief for perimenopause, for example,' he says. 'Throw out the soy and you throw out the isoflavones.' (It is possible to obtain plant estrogens to a lesser extent from other foods, such as lima beans or flax.) 'The literature is extensive on the benefits of soy, and that should always be stated, just as the hazards should be. That's science. These studies are not ridiculous or contrived, but take a look at them. Who's funding them?' asks Bauman.
'There are a lot of problems with these studies,' Daniel says, adding that the 1999 heart health claim was an industry-funded initiative. 'Even if there is positive information, and even if these studies are well designed, we need to weigh that against the fact that we've also got really good studies showing the dangers. Better safe than sorry is the precautionary principle. Possible bene-fits are far outweighed by proven risks.'
Daniel and Bauman agree on the benefits of variety. 'My experience as a clinical nutritionist is that people who have a varied diet tend not to get into trouble,' says Daniel.
'We like to demonize certain foods in this society,' says Bauman. 'If you want to find a fault, you'll find it. The bottom line is: What is a healthy diet?'

Reprinted from Terrain (Spring 2007), published by Berkeley's Ecology Center. Dedicated to fine feature writing about environmental issues, Terrain is distributed free throughout Northern California. Subscriptions: $15/yr. (3 issues) from 2530 San Pablo Ave., Berkeley, CA 94702; www.ecologycenter.org/terrain.

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Soy 'Nuggets'
Tofu
Soy milk, curdled and pressed into cubes of varying firmness. Often used as meat substitute. A nonfermented product, tofu contains antinutrients, which can block absorption of essential minerals.
Miso
Fermented soybean paste, used in soups and sauces. Rich in probiotics, good bacteria that aid vitamin absorption. Miso is high in sodium but is considered one of the healthiest soy products.
Soybean Oil
To extract oil, soybeans are superheated, ground, pressed, mixed with chemicals, and washed in a centrifuge. Soybean oil accounts for 80 percent of all liquid oils consumed annually in the United States.
Soy Milk
A processed beverage made of ground soybeans mixed with water and boiled, which removes some toxins. Sugar is added to improve flavor. An eight-ounce serving contains up to 35 milligrams of isoflavones, which may change estrogen levels and hormonal function.
Snack Food
Highly processed, a source of trans fat. Check your labels: Potato chips, tortilla crisps, and many other deep-fried things have been cooked in soy oil--straight up or partially hydrogenated.
Tempeh
Whole soybeans pressed into loaves, which are then fermented. Often used as a meat substitute. Tempeh is rich in B vitamins, minerals, and omega-3 fatty acids.
Fast Food
A source of hidden soy. Processed soy proteins extend some burgers and chicken (nuggets, patties, even 'grilled breasts'). Buns contain soy oil and to a lesser extent soy flour and lecithin. Soy oil also appears in dressings and dips, in American 'cheese,' and as the No. 2 ingredient in fries. There's even soy in Big Mac's secret sauce: Soybean oil nets top billing.
Edamame
Whole soybeans, commonly boiled in the pod and eaten as a snack. Most commercial edamame has been preheated to make digestion easier, but it still contains antinutrients.

Image by Mo Riza, licensed under Creative Commons. 

"You Think You Knew Crazy? Think Again. 10 Shockers from the Increasingly Unhinged Right Wing" | Alternet

Nothing shuts down America's far-right lunatic fringe.........



CLICK HERE FOR ARTICLE

"How Redshirting Your Kindergartner Could Backfire" ~ Benjy Hansen-Bundy

Delaying kindergarten can have early benefits, but the long-term effects aren't so appealing—for both redshirted kids and their peers.

By Benjy Hansen-Bundy | Wed Oct. 2, 2013 3:00 AM PDT

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Social Title: 

How redshirting your kindergartner could backfire

In this era of hypercompetitive parenting [1], more families are choosing to delay their children's entry into kindergarten, under the impression that the kids will have an academic and social advantage. In fact, a 2008 study [2] by Harvard researchers claims that since the late 1960s, the number of six-year-olds in first grade has dropped by 9 percent because they are increasingly likely to be enrolled in kindergarten.
No one disputes the immediate results of "redshirting," a phrase borrowed from the sports world [3]. Six-year-olds categorically test better [4] than five-year-olds in kindergarten, and they enjoy greater social and physical maturity that helps them make friends and win at tag. But there's a growing [5] debate [6] about the effectiveness of redshirting in the long term—not only for the kids held back, but for their peers, as well.
Some context: Like private school, redshirting is most prevalent among white, Asian, and relatively wealthy families. Here's 2010 data [7] from the National Center for Education Statistics on the percentages of kids delaying kindergarten:

There are several factors at play here, including the traditional wisdom, backed up by research [8], that shows little boys to be particularly fidgety in kindergarten. That said, the most striking disparity is also the most worrying. For families earning the least in this country, redshirting is cost-prohibitive [9] (PDF). As higher-income families delay their kids' kindergarten entry, children from lower-income families end up "competing" against older and more-prepared classmates—at a crucial time for learning and development.

Given the increasingly dramatic size of the existing achievement gap [10]—one exacerbated by few affordable pre-K options [11]—some worry that as teachers make kindergarten more challenging to engage the older students, low-income kids will fall even further behind [12](PDF). Poor students already repeat the grade three times [7] more frequently than wealthy kids.
What's more, a growing body of research suggests that redshirted kids might not enjoy benefits over the long run, anyway. A 2007 paper[13] for the National Bureau of Economic Research argues that "contrary to much academic and popular discussion of school entry age—being old relative to one's peers is not beneficial." (Also, unpublished research [14] from 2012 found that the advantages of redshirting "fade out and appear to reverse by eighth grade.")
Until more-conclusive research emerges, well-meaning parents are likely to continue redshirting their children. And depending on the individual child, that could be the right choice. But as Harvard researcher David Deming says, it's crucial that parents "make a decision with the whole life course in mind."

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Source URL: http://www.motherjones.com/mojo/2013/10/redshirting-kindergarten-backfire-education

Links:
[1] http://www.motherjones.com/environment/2013/09/high-tech-baby-gadgets-helicopter-parents
[2] http://scholar.harvard.edu/files/ddeming/files/deming_dynarski_childhood.pdf
[3] http://www.nytimes.com/2006/05/07/magazine/07wwln_freak.html?pagewanted=all&_r=1&
[4] http://files.eric.ed.gov/fulltext/EJ973826.pdf
[5] http://www.nytimes.com/2011/09/25/opinion/sunday/dont-delay-your-kindergartners-start.html
[6] http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/elements/2013/09/youngest-kid-smartest-kid.html
[7] http://nces.ed.gov/programs/digest/d12/tables/dt12_136.asp
[8] http://www.terry.uga.edu/~cornwl/research/cmvp.genderdiffs.pdf
[9] http://researchroom.wikispaces.com/file/view/Retention,+Social+Promotion+and+redshirting.pdf
[10] http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/04/27/no-rich-child-left-behind/
[11] http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/08/17/crushed-by-the-cost-of-child-care/
[12] https://www.msu.edu/~telder/2009-JHR.pdf
[13] http://www.nber.org/papers/w13663.pdf?new_window=1
[14] http://conservancy.umn.edu/bitstream/123591/1/Bixby_The%20Effect%20of%20Academic%20Redshirting%20on%20Math%20and%20Reading%20Achievement%20An%20Analysis%20of%20Short%20Term%20and%20Long%20Term%20Impacts.pdf

"The Shutdown in 10 Infuriating Sentences" by Kevin Drum / Mother Jones

Forget the blather. Here's what is actually going on.

By Kevin Drum | Fri Oct. 4, 2013 3:00 AM PDT

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Social Title: 

The shutdown in 10 infuriating sentences

At its core, the dispute over the budget and the debt ceiling isn't complicated at all. But it is full of misconceptions and urban myths. Here are the 10 facts worth remembering past all the obfuscation:
1. Democrats have already agreed to fund the government at Republican levels. [1]
2. Despite what you might have heard, there have only been two serious government shutdowns in recent history, and both were the result of Republican ultimatums. [2]
3. Democrats in the Senate have been begging the House to negotiate over the budget [3] for the past six months, but Republicans have refused.
4. That's because Republicans wanted to wait until they had either a government shutdown or a debt ceiling breach as leverage, something they've been very clear [4] about all along.

5. Republicans keep talking about compromise, but they've offered nothing in return [5] for agreeing to their demands—except to keep the government intact if they get their way.
6. The public is very strongly opposed [6] to using a government shutdown to stop Obamacare.
7. Contrary to Republican claims, the deficit is not increasing [7]—it peaked in 2009 and has been dropping ever since, declining by $200 billion last year with another $450 billion drop projected this year.
8. A long government shutdown is likely to seriously hurt economic growth [8], with a monthlong shutdown projected to slash GDP in the fourth quarter by 1 percentage point and reduce employment by over a million jobs.
9. No, Democrats have not used debt ceiling hostage taking [9] in the past to force presidents to accept their political agenda.
10. This whole dispute is about the Republican Party fighting to make sure the working poor don't have access to affordable health care. 

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Source URL: http://www.motherjones.com/kevin-drum/2013/10/shutdown-debt-ceiling-explained